Losing Makoto
by Tinni
Summary: Makoto get's scouted by a talent agent to be a model and moves to Tokyo to pursue a career in modelling and music. Suddenly Haru faces the prospect of losing Makoto and is spurred into action to chase the man he has loved since age 4. Meanwhile Makoto has become a source of warmth and happiness for Rin that he doesn't want to lose... M rated for angst (no smut)
1. Chapter 1

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing!

* * *

It was a typical lazy Iwatobi day that Makoto was spending window shopping along Iwatobi's main shopping street. He wasn't looking for anything particular but Makoto knew some birthdays were coming-up, as were his parents anniversary and he wasn't the type of guy to leave things last minute. For one thing, he didn't have a lot of money as his allowance wasn't large and because being a swimmer wasn't cheap. Even with Makoto supplementing his allowance doing odd jobs from time to time, usually down at the fishing port and sometimes at the beachfront stores, he still had to budget carefully for presents. So when Makoto had a chance, like he had today, he made a point of looking for bargains, sales etc on nice things that his friends and family would love.

Makoto came across a sweet store and stopped to decide if there was something he would like to bring back for Ren and Ran, maybe something for Haru too. Caught-up trying to remember how much money he had with him, since he wasn't really comfortable pulling out his wallet and counting how much had on him, as well as trying to decide what he should get - Makoto didn't notice that a strange looking man was inching closer and closer to him. Not until the man had invaded his personal space enough that Makoto felt the man's breath on the side of his neck.

"Ah!" exclaimed Makoto as he jumped back and faced the man with a look of confusion mingled with fear on his face, "What…"

"You are gorgeous!" the man declared, as he took steps to bridge the gap Makoto had just created between them, "Absolutely, stunningly gorgeous! I bet you have a lovely body! Yes, I can tell, its all muscular and sexy as hell. I want to see it! Every inch of it!"

"Ehhhhhh," exclaimed Makoto as he slowly started to back away.

Makoto was about ready to turn and run when the man actually grabbed him in a surprisingly strong grasp, "Don't run! And don't be afraid! I am not going to hurt you! I just want your body!"

"Huh!" Makoto exclaimed as he desperately looked around for Haru, only to remember Haru wasn't here.

But then, "Oi," came a low dangerous voice.

The man holding Makoto turned towards the street side and then was met with a solid fist to his guts that left him winded but otherwise unhurt. "Rin!" cried Makoto in patently relief as he jumped behind Rin, thus placing the shark between himself and the strange aggressive man.

Rin sighed, "Honestly Makoto, you are a freaking giant that's made of muscles but still the biggest potential rape victim I know!"

"Huh?" started Makoto, "Do potential rape victims have a specific type or something?"

"Sort of," said Rin, before sighing again, "You are too gentle for your own good. Anyway, let's get out of here."

"Wai….wait," wheezed the man, "Don't go! Please don't go! I can't let such a find like you go without tests shots!" Rin cracked his knuckles, the man got the hint and started to explain, "I am sorry if I came across a little weird, but I just couldn't help myself. You are so gorgeous!" he once again said to Makoto, "But," he added quickly, eyeing Rin carefully, "I wasn't thinking any perverted thoughts. I am actually not into that kind of thing. I just liking looking, which is why I am so good at what I do! Scouting out models!"

"Huh!" both Rin and Makoto exclaimed.

The man by this time had recovered enough to stand properly, he reached into his pocket and pulled out his card, "I am Tanaka Lory! I work for a Kyo-Kon talent agency's modelling section and I want to explore the potential of putting that gorgeous body of yours to work for my agencies clients!"

Rin and Makoto both gave blank stares before Rin exclaimed, "This is like an intro to a porno!"

"No I swear I am legitimate!" said Tanaka, "You can do searches on my company and call them up to verify my credentials. In fact," he looked at Rin, "You can come as a bodyguard to make sure I don't do anything to your boyfriend."

"He's not my boyfriend," both Rin and Makoto exclaimed in unison, before Rin added, "Speaking of boyfriends, where is Haru? Shouldn't he be here making sure you don't get in trouble?"

"Haru's not my boyfriend either!" exclaimed Makoto, slightly irritated.

"Could have fooled me," said Rin evenly, "The way you too act, you might as well be married."

Makoto's eyes twitched, "Are you making fun of me?"

"No just stating facts," said Rin with a grin, "Anyway, let's go."

"No wait please," Tanaka blocked Makoto's path, "Just take my card and think about it! There could be good money in it for you. Just some test shots! And you can bring whoever you like to the session! Just… just come and let us take some pictures that we can add to our portfolio. We can't pay you for the session but we will happily provide you with digital copies of the photos. These will be professional shots, so they are worth something!" Tanaka proceeded to press his card into Makoto's hands, saying, "Just think about it! And if you are at all interested, give me a call and we can work out a suitable time. But mind you, I am always travelling so the sooner you call the better!"

* * *

"Just throw away the card and forget it," Rin had advised Makoto before they had parted but Makoto's curiosity had gotten the better of him. Instead he had come home and researched the talent agency and dug around the web for information on Tanaka Lory.

Tanaka Lory was a legitimate talent scout as well as a legitimate weirdo who did like ogling both men and women. But he had a good eye and so the company tolerated his eccentricities. As for the company, they had a good reputation and had a helpful "what to expect when starting to model" section on their website that laid bear the uncertainties, low pay and costs the model had to pay from their own pocket etc. Makoto is left with no delusion and he can respect a company that doesn't try to sugarcoat reality. Yet…

Makoto thinks about all the things he wants to give his friends and family. He would love to be able to join a gym with an indoor pool with Haru and watch Haru swim all year long. He wants to give Ren and Ran more toys, more sweets, more books and more of everything. He would love, absolutely love to be able to send his parents on a long vacation for their anniversary that's coming-up. Plus there is the future to think about. He could do with some money.

Not that Makoto thought he was going to land any jobs. But was it really okay not to try? The test shot sessions were not going to cost him anything but some time. Maybe he should go… but he didn't really want to go alone… at the sametime he didn't want to tell any of his friends because the whole thing was making his a bit self-conscious. But Rin already knew so…

Makoto texted Rin, "Rin, I think I want to do the test shot session thing. But I really don't want to go alone and I don't want to tell Haru and the others if I don't have to. Could you come with me?" As Makoto hit send he wondered if Rin would agree. If he didn't… should Makoto ask Haru? Would Haru come with him? Makoto was certain Nagisa would come and would probably drag Rei, Gou and even Haru long because this is the kind of thing that would make Nagisa excited. Which is exactly why he didn't want the whole gang there.

Makoto sighed, if Rin said no, he would ask Haru and if Haru said no, Makoto would forget it. With that resolution, Makoto headed to bed but just then his phone rang, "Hello Rin," he said, having noticed the caller ID.

"Why are you doing this?" Rin demanded, getting straight to the point.

"I could use the money," said Makoto frankly, "Well, assuming I get anywhere that is and this is not just a dead end. But its likely to be more fun than helping unload fish and a lot less smelly."

"I don't know, models wear a lot of perfume," Rin offered dryly. Makoto laughed. Rin sighed, "I'll go with you but I still think this is a bad idea."

"Don't worry," said Makoto gently, "I doubt I'll get anywhere. I mean, would you buy a product my face was peddling?"

"Makoto, you really have no idea do you, how many men would turn gay for you and how many women would go to the ends of the earth to have you all to themselves," wondered Rin.

"Zero?" offered Makoto.

Rin laughed, "Don't change," he told him, "Text me the details when you have them," and with that they hung-up. Afterwards Makoto went happily to bed, but Rin stayed-up with an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach.

* * *

**Author's Note:** So this is an idea that came to me about Makoto being discovered by a talent agency and becoming busy modelling and later releasing and promoting a debut single (Rage On of course because Makoto's VA sings that). Suddenly Haru and the gang, plus Rin, are looking at losing Makoto to the idol-dom and well… cue the angst?


	2. Chapter 2

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Just three days after Makoto's strange encounter with the talent scout Tanaka Lory, Makoto and Rin found themselves standing in-front of an inconspicuous looking house. It looked just like a residential property, so Rin couldn't help asking, "You sure you got the right address?"

"I think so," said Makoto, double checking the email he was sent on his phone, "Let's knock and find out."

They barely finished knocking when the door was enthusiastically opened by a thoroughly excited Tanaka, "Tachibana-kun! Come in, come in and I see you brought your handsome not-boyfriend protector with you too!"

Rin rolled his eyes but said nothing while Makoto laughed nervously, "Thank you for having us," Makoto said politely.

"No, no, thank you for calling," said Tanaka, "Let me introduce you to our photographer," he lead them inside and it was then that they realised that the inside of the house had been completely remodelled into a photographic studio, "Ah here is the genius with the lens, Hayate Asami! Asami-chan let me introduce you to… Tachibana Makoto and um..."

"Matsuoka Rin," Rin introduced himself.

Asami acknowledged them both with a nod before turning to Makoto and studying him carefully and closely. She began to slowly walk around him, studying him like an artist would study the medium they were about to carve, mold or otherwise shape into art. Makoto felt more than a little uncomfortable under her gaze. Finally she nodded, "Time to strip," she finally stated.

"Eh!" gasped a shocked Makoto.

"We are leaving!" declared Rin, as he gave the evil eye to Tanaka - who had started drooling.

Asami sighed, "Let me elaborate," she pulled back a curtain to reveal a changing room, "Please go in there and put on one of the three outfits there. Than we can get started."

Now that he was here, Makoto started to feel a rising panic. What the hell was he doing? Was modelling just about putting on different clothes and standing in front of a camera? Of course not! If it was, anyone could do it. He knew nothing about posing and stuff like that. What on earth was he doing?

"Haru," he found himself mentally calling out, "Haru," But Haru wasn't there and he had no one to draw strength fro…

"Don't overthink it," Rin interrupted his thoughts bluntly, "Not like anyone is expecting you to be a supermodel from the get go. Beside, we can just leave if you really don't want to do it anymore."

"Yes, yes, that's exactly right!" interjected Tanaka, "Well at least the part about no one expecting you to know everything from the start! The leaving part is wrong! Don't leave! Just put one of the outfits on and let Asami-chan ogle you with her camera!"

"Why do I get the impression this day is going to end with me punching you again," said Rin, addressing Tanaka.

"Again?" wondered Asami.

Tanaka laughed self deprecatingly, "I got a little over enthusiastic when we met. Enough of that," he started to pull Makoto towards the change room, "Get dressed! Get dressed!"

They started with getting Makoto to just stand naturally before coaxing him into striking different poses, making different facial expressions etc, etc. They got him to wear all three outfits in-turn and did similar things. But as the session wore on, they also asked him to think of poses that he thought best suited the outfit he was in or just to strike a pose he naturally would in the outfit in question. Makoto did his best and hoped he wasn't disgracing himself too badly.

Standing at the back of the room, Rin found a feeling of unease at the pit of his stomach. Especially since he could see the laptop that was connected to Asami's digital camera and where a copy of the pictures she was taking were also displayed. Rin did not know much about photography and even less about fashion but it was obvious even to him that Makoto was terribly photogenic and he was learning very, very quickly to pose and emote.

Why was he uneasy? Wasn't it a good thing that Makoto was showing potential for modelling? Afterall, he couldn't spend his life being Haru's conduit to the world beyond water, not to mention other people. Eventually Makoto was going to find something all his own. It might as well be modelling! Yet the unease did not lessen.

* * *

"I am sorry it took so long Rin," said Makoto, the whole session had taken about two and a half hours, "I really thought it would be done sooner."

Rin shrugged, "Wasn't your fault."

"Let me buy you dinner," said Makoto, "It's the least I can do and you must be hungry. What do you want to eat?"

"Ramen sounds good," said Rin. They found a ramen place and sat down to dinner. They talked about random things of no consequence. Before finally Rin brought-up the topic weighing him down, "I think you are going to be pretty successful as a model Makoto."

"Thanks, that's very kind of you to say," Makoto replied with a smile.

"I am serious," said Rin, "Anyway, you should tell Haru and take him with you… um… next time. I mean you are doing this for him aren't you."

"Well not just for Haru but," Makoto smiled that smile, the smile he has on his face when he looks at Haru or, as he was now, thinking about Haru, "I didn't care when he quit competitive swimming. That was, afterall, never his thing. But our old swim club closed about the same time and suddenly Haru didn't have a place to swim since the school pool was only for the club. There was only so many times we could break into the pool after hours. I… don't really want that to happen again. So if I can earn enough to get us into a gym with an indoor pool, well then, it'll all be worth it!"

"Will it?" wondered Rin and then Makoto's full speech registered, "Also, why did Haru quit competitive swimming anyway? Seems like a daft thing to do."

"Ah well…" Makoto realised he couldn't just tell Rin that Haru had quit because Rin had been hurt. For one it wasn't his place. So Makoto just smiled and said, "Ask Haru sometime," he said, "As for it being worth it," Makoto smiled that thinking-of-Haru smile again, "Watching Haru swim and be happy is always worth it."

Rin said nothing and returned to eating his ramen. Makoto took the hint and changed the topic to something Rin would be interested in, like the upcoming swim trials for the national team, "Are you going to go?"

"Of course," replied Rin, "Captain Mikoshiba is also going," Rin sighed, "We'll be sharing a dorm room while at the trials… I am going to have to listen to him gush over Gou for an entire week!" Makoto smiled in sympathy and they continued on the topic of the swim trials, including events Rin was going to take part in and his chances of success for the rest of their meal.

After they parted, Makoto decided that no matter what happened with the modelling thing. He was glad he decided to do the test sessions, if only because it was nice to spend time with Rin without Rin being all angsty, troubled and so very, very angry. Makoto, afterall, did miss the sweet smiling innocently romantic Rin of the past. But the current badass, sexy, broody Rin wasn't bad either, in fact, he was pretty cool. Overall, Makoto was glad Rin was back, even if Rin did have a tendency to disturb Haru's peace of mind.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well a lot of people showed interest in this fic so I guess I'll continue it for now and see where it goes. Thanks for all the comments and reviews from last chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Three days on from the test shots, the only people other than Rin who knew about Makoto's fashion adventures were Makoto's parents. At least Makoto assumed his father knew. He had in fact only told his mother a heavily edited version of his encounter with the Tanaka the scout, leaving out the ogling and Rin's punch, and expressed his desire to go the test session just to see where the path might lead. His mother had given him her enthusiastic support but was surprised that Rin, not Haru, was the one going with him. Indeed his mother had a hard time remember who Rin was but eventually remembered that Rin was the "cute little red-haired butterfly swimmer who smiled a lot". Makoto commented that Rin was no longer little but rather tall and more handsome than cute but he didn't have the heart to tell her that he didn't smile much anymore.

Apart from a "How did it go?" from his mother straight after his return, Makoto hadn't talked about his brush with modelling. Figuring he would let Ren, Ran and Haru in on the story once he received the email containing the photographs from the test session. They would have a look at the pictures together, Makoto would get laughed at and teased and that'll be that. Because every passing day was convincing Makoto more and more of how absurd the whole concept of boring old him being a model was. Makoto wasn't totally oblivious to his looks but models were super hot right? Or at least looked super hot in fashionable cloths and so make you want to emulate them and buy the clothes, the perfume, the gum or whatever else it is that they are selling. Who would want to emulate him, Makoto wondered.

So it was that Makoto was completely and utterly shocked when his phone, which he never put on silent because mostly Haru and his family ever called him and if they were calling him - Makoto needed to pick-up no matter what he was doing, went off during lunch and it was the photographer Hayate Asami on the other end, "It's lunch time right? It's been awhile since I was in school."

"Ah, yes, umm… Hayate-san?" ventured Makoto since Asami hadn't jumped straight to asking him about lunch and so Makoto had, had to place her voice.

"Call me Asami," she said, "You have some awesome karma," she declared.

"Ha?"

"Yesterday Tanaka made his monthly scouting finds presentation to HQ in Tokyo and your pictures were of course included. Just as your gorgeous smile was lighting-up the room the creative director Go Out magazine, who was in our offices for a meeting, walked by and saw you picture through the glass wall of our meeting room. He decided you were the kind of person who would be able to pull off the edgy styles they are known for. Plus you looked like someone who had an appreciation of the outdoors," she explained before adding, "Do you?"

"Well my family do camp out every summer," offered Makoto with a forced laugh, his head spinning because Go Out was a popular magazine.

"Well that's just perfect," said Asami, "I am heading to Tokyo this afternoon. Get packed, and meet me at train station by 7 PM. You can bring the red-head if you like. The office is happy to advance you money for two tickets. You'll stay the night at one of the apartments our office rents for guests, out of town models and for shoots. You'll have to share a double bed though, if you bring your friend but I imagine that's not going to be a problem."

"Ah, I have school tomorr…" started Makoto.

"Get used to skipping," said Asami, "See you at 7," with that she hung-up.

Makoto held the phone to his ears long after Asami had hung-up, just listening to the disconnected tone. His mind reeling. Tanaka had told him that his first jobs were likely to be catalogue work and maybe some of the small magazines but instead he was off to Tokyo tomorrow to take part in a shoot for Go Out? This was unbelievable!

"Mako-chan," Nagisa gently prodded, "Are you okay?"

This brought Makoto back to reality and made him notice that all three of his friends were looking at him with worried gazes. He quickly put away his phone and forced himself to smile, "I am fine! I just… won't be at school tomorrow," he said as he looked away.

Nagisa pouted and was clearly about to ask why but Haru jumped Nagisa to the gun and demanded, "Why? And who's Hayate-san?"

"Are you having an affair with an older woman?" Nagisa asked suddenly.

"Huh! Why did your mind go there Nagisa!" demanded Makoto.

"I saw something like that in one of my sisters shoujo mangas," Nagisa said cheerfully, "So, so, Mako-chan, is that why you are skipping school tomorrow?"

"Nagisa-kun!" exclaimed the exasperated Rei as Haru's expression tightened.

Makoto swallowed and decided to just come clean and told them everything. This time he didn't bother to censor anything either.

"Wow! Mako-chan is going to be a model!" exclaimed Nagisa, "That's great!"

"Congratulations senpai," said Rei, "Modelling is a truly beautiful profession," he declared.

Nagisa then turned to Haru and asked, "So Haru-chan, I guess you'll be going with Mako-chan right?"

"He can take Rin," Haru said in his deadpan voice but Makoto felt the full force of Haru's anger.

"Haru…" he started but he couldn't really continue in front of Nagisa and Rei. Fortunately, they were not as bad at reading the mood as people believed them to be and excused themselves before long, leaving Makoto and Haru alone.

"Haru," Makoto started again, "I am really, really sorry I ended-up going with Rin. It's just that…" Makoto sighed, "I was embarrassed and Rin already knew… it seemed easier just to ask him. But while I was there, I was really scared and then I thought of Haru and thinking of Haru calmed me down and I was able to do my best. That's why, that's why I would really appreciate it if you would come with me to Tokyo, Haru."

There was a moment of silence that seemed to extend even to Haru's mind because Makoto had not a clue what Haru was thinking. Finally Haru asked, "What are you trying to do?"

Makoto blinked, hadn't Haru asked this before? Yes, Haru had asked it of Rin when Rin had told them he was going to Australia. "I don't have any big dream or set goals," admitted Makoto, "I just want to follow this road for a while because it seems fun and collect some coins along the way. If I get enough coins, I would like to get my parents a big present for their anniversary and do something nice for Ren and Ran," Makoto explained, he hesitated for a moment before adding, "I also would like to do something nice with Haru-chan. Maybe join a gym with an indoor pool so I can swim with Haru-chan all year long or go with Haru-chan to that new water amusement park and…"

"Makoto," Haru interrupted, "You shouldn't do these things for other people. You should think of yourself more."

"But I am thinking about myself, Haru-chan," said Makoto, "Because nothing makes me happier than seeing the people I love happy. Especially Haru-chan," and that Haru knew to be the absolute truth.

For reasons Haru could never comprehend, Makoto's own enjoyment of something was always heightened when he saw Haru was also enjoy it. Whether it be gazing at the reflecting of the stars on a puddle of rain water or swimming in the relay together or simply enjoying a festival, no matter how happy the activity was making Makoto, if Haru was also happy, Makoto was happier.

"I'll go with you," Haru finally said, "Besides, school would be a pain without you anyway."

Makoto smiled one of his big smile and all was right between them… until the next day when Haru watched in Makoto during the magazine photoshoot and felt… Haru wasn't sure what he was feeling but he didn't like it. He didn't like it one bit. Because the Makoto who stood underneath the glare of the spotlights, striking poses as instructed by Asami did not feel like Makoto, even if Makoto's eyes were frequently tracking to Haru and Haru knew Makoto was drawing strength and courage from Haru like he would normally, Haru felt uneasy. He didn't like this. He didn't like this at all.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** The game "Animal Crossing: Deep Sea" mentioned is from FrFr short 1 that was included with the first DVD volume. It's apparently what Makoto and Haru play with Ran and Ren. As I said before, the underwater hotel is real but not yet built. If you want to see concept pictures and stuff, go here: underwaterhoteldubai dot org


	4. Chapter 4

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Like many of Haru's epiphanies, his epiphany regarding why he did not approve of Makoto's bygoning modelling career had come in the pool. In a Tokyo pool of the apartment complex where he and Makoto were staying during Makoto's second call-up to Tokyo. This time it had been during a weekend and so Makoto had not hesitated to ask Haru again. Makoto had felt very guilty about the first time because Haru had missed school. He had worked hard to get notes for the indifferent Haru and made sure Haru would not fall behind due to Makoto's selfishness. But since the second time was during a weekend, Makoto had allowed himself to be selfish and had all but begged Haru to come with him again.

Haru had gotten bored of watching Makoto's shoot and so had wandered back to the apartment complex and had made his way to the pool. He wasn't really swimming as he was drifting on his back and that's when it hit him, Makoto was drifting. Makoto was drifting away from Iwatobi and Haru and Makoto didn't even realise he was doing it. Haru righted himself and started to tread water so he could remain upright, as a sort of panic filled him.

He knew this may be coming since their future beyond high school was not necessarily intertwined but he had hoped, prayed that he would still have the rest of high school to enjoy being besides his best friend. But now, now Haru realised he had taken for granted that Makoto wouldn't change, wouldn't start to drift away, at least until the end of high school. Haru swam to the edge of the pool and was about to pull himself out when, "Haru-chan," Makoto was there, holding out his hand to pull Haru-up, "I hope you weren't too bored. Sorry I couldn't get away sooner. Are you hungry?"

Haru let himself be pulled up and said, "Makoto, you should probably get used to coming to Tokyo without me," it hurt to say, "I mean, I can't always be beside you. Especially if you are serious about this."

"I am sorry Haru-chan," whispered Makoto, "I was being very selfish wasn't I? Dragging you here with me, I mean. I am really sorry."

"Don't be," said Haru, "I wanted to come too. I wanted to support you and if this is what I want to do…" Haru trailed off. Even though they were still holding hands, Haru felt a growing distance between them.

"Hey Haru-chan," Makoto suddenly asked, "Do you realise how long we have been together?"

"13 year, six months and 12 days," offered Haru.

"I think the months and days might be a bit much Haru-chan," said Makoto, picking up on the fact that Haru was making a joke to try and lighten the mood, "And besides, how can you calculate the days and months when we can't remember when we met exactly. I mean, for me, you were always just there."

It was the same for Haru as well. All he really remembered was starting to call Makoto, Makoto around kindergarten. Haru wasn't even sure what he called Makoto before that, just that since kindergarten Makoto has been Makoto and he has been Haru-chan. Kindergarten was 13 years ago. They have been together since the age of four. No wonder they were often teased as being the old married couple by their schoolmates.

"The point is, Haru-chan," Makoto continued, "I don't want us ever to part but I know we probably will after we graduate. I don't even know what you want to do after graduation and if I don't know, I can't follow you… and that's assuming you are okay with me following you and don't think I am being some sort of creepy, clingy, stalker who is weirdly dependent on you and…"

"Makoto," said Haru, "If you ever call yourself those things again, I swear I will never speak to you. Think about it Makoto, a lifetime of the silent treatment!"

Makoto laughed, but then became serious, "I don't know what I want to do. Not right now and certainly not what I want to do after graduation. Except that I want to be besides you always. So for now, I want to try walking along this road and see where it leads. I… probably will have to walk alone because I can't keep dragging Haru-chan with me to Tokyo and," Makoto blushed, "It seems I might be coming to Tokyo a lot."

Haru blinked, just how far had Makoto drifted already? the Go Out magazine wasn't even out yet! "Did something else happen?" wondered Haru.

"Few more people showed interest," said Makoto, "But nothing serious. They want to wait for the Go Out issue to come out and also the ad I shot today to start running before they sign me up for anything. Makes sense, I might totally bomb with the consumers."

For a moment Haru almost wished Makoto would bomb. Almost, but his better feelings caught-up with him and checked the wish. Instead Haru said as sincerely as he could, "I'll be cheering for you."

Makoto smiled, "Thanks Haru-chan, but for now. Let's just return to Iwatobi and resume our everyday lives."

To this Haru readily agreed, adding, "I don't know what I want to do after graduation yet, Makoto," explained Haru, "So don't worry too much about it. But what I do know is that I don't want to part from you either," and that made Makoto smile, really genuinely smile. They headed back to their apartment. They had an early train to catch in the morning.

About a week after Haru and Makoto returned to Iwatobi, the ad Makoto had shot ran in a weekly magazine. Two weeks after that, the Go Out magazine came out. Both were hits and Tachibana Makoto landed a year long contract with Go Out and that was just the start.

* * *

Dear Rin,

Thanks for coming with me to the test session. Sorry it took me five weeks to find a way to properly thank you.

"Actually Makoto, I think you thanked me by buying dinner," Rin thought but kept reading the letter he had unexpectedly received from Makoto, about six weeks after he had accompanied Makoto to the test session. In that six week Rin received one text thanking him again and informing him Makoto was off to Tokyo for his first shoot with Haru and that had been it. It was actually one text more than Rin had expected because… well, he wasn't exactly close friends with any of them any more.

I don't know if you have seen any of the stuff I appeared in...

Rin glance at the few magazines on his table, that otherwise was spartanly neat and tidy and generally only had his school books. Yeah, he might have kept abreast of Makoto's modelling activities...

...but my next job is for an amusement park. I managed to get day passes for everybody. The day passes also act as transport passes which is great because the park is a bit far and you have to take a Shinkansan. I sent you two. I hope you can make it. You don't have to meet-up with us if you don't want to. You can always just meet-up with Gou-chan. I gave two to Gou-chan so she can go with her friend, Hanamura Chigusa. Have you met Chigusa-chan? She's kind of cute, I think you'll like her. Of course Gou-chan might decide to go with Captain Mikoshiba. ^.^

"Don't even joke about that Makoto," Rin chastised mentally, "And I also hope you and Gou aren't trying to set me up with this Chigusa-chan. I don't have time for dating crap."

Anyway, hope you can make it and if you like, come and watch me prance around pretending to be on a date with the model Hinamori Chizuru. Have you seen her work? They think we look good together so I keep getting paired with her. Haru doesn't like her.

"Of course he doesn't, you dolt!" thought Rin, "I get jealous and I am not your other half."

- Makoto

Rin sighed and looked at the passes he was sent. He stared at it for a good five minutes before calling out, "Nitori!"

Nitori jumped and instinctively slammed shut his journal, into which he was writing his Rin related observation from the day, "Yes!" he called back from the top bunk.

"What are you doing this sunday?"

"Umm…" Nitori had no plans but he felt he should maybe say he was going to do something productive like training or studying. That's the kind of thing is perfect senpai Matsuoka Rin would be doing on a sunday right?

"What to go to an amusement park with me?" Rin asked.

Nitori tilted down from his bunk and gave Rin a surprised look, double checking that he was not being toyed with. Rin stared back impassively, but that seemed to be enough to satisfy Nitori who smiled a radiant smile and replied, "Yes, of course! Let's have fun senpai."

"Whatever," replied Rin and turned away to text Gou to let her know he would be at the park and wasn't averse to meeting-up with her for part of the day if she wanted to spend some time with her brother.

* * *

Rin didn't want to admit it but he was having fun. Gou's friend was cute to look at and she had the good grace to keep Nitori company as Gou herself clung to Rin, delighting in being able to spend some quality time with her older brother.

They saw Haru, Makoto and Makoto's family in the distance with Nagisa and Rei tagging along but Rin changed course so he at least wouldn't run into them. Dealing with Makoto was one thing, dealing with the whole gang together… especially Haru… just the thought soured Rin's mood. But it soon lifted as Gou dragged him away to ride a roller coaster with her. Rin liked roller coasters, though Nitori was green by the end of the ride.

Sometime in the afternoon Gou got a text from Nagisa telling her they were about to start shooting Makoto's commercial and gave her the location to come if she wanted to watch. She did, Rin didn't but Gou insisted, he went along because he didn't have the energy to argue but made the point of putting on his baseball cap and hanging back so he didn't ran into Haru and Nagisa. Gou took the hint and silently agreed to the compromise.

Still, from Rin's position, he not only had a good view of Makoto and the model Hinamori, who had a habit of clinging onto Makoto even between takes and Makoto was of course too nice to shake her off, but also of Haruka. Rin was not as adept as reading Haru's mood as Makoto but even he could tell that Haru was getting more on edge and annoyed the longer the commercial shoot lasted.

"Action," cried the director for the tenth time.

Makoto took his position in front of a visitors map that served to discreetly advertised the name of the park while the camera captured Makoto casually lounging. "Damn he's sexy," thought Rin, "When the hell did this happen?" he wondered, "When did our cute Mako-chan become… become like this? Damn you puberty!"

On cue Hinamori run into the shot calling-out an apology and asking, "Have you been waiting long?"

And there it was, the Makoto smile, warm and comforting but this time tinged with something indefinably sexy with bedroom eyes thrown in for good measures as he extended his arm to Hinamori and said simply, "Not at all, let's have fun…"

And for the tenth time in a row, Hinamori fumbled her bit. Rin rubbed his forehead, why the hell could the girl not manage the simple task of smiling back and going, "Let's!" and walking off arm in arm with Makoto? Wasn't she supposed to be a professional?

"I guess Hinamori-chan is struggling because this is her first TV commercial," Gou's friend Chigusa pipped in, "She's only done print stuff so far."

"Are you a fan, Chigusa-kun?" asked Gou.

Chigusa nodded, "Just a little," she said with a smile before turning back to watch Hinamori, who was apologising again to Makoto and the director. Makoto was being understanding, the director clearly was running out of patience. "Mind you though," Chigusa added, "If Tachibana-senpai looked at me like that, I would forget my lines too! I wonder if he's thinking of anyone when he makes that face."

"Haru."

"Haruka-senpai," said Rin and Gou respectively, simultaneously.

"Eh? Are they going out?" wondered Chigusa.

Gou didn't know how to answer that but Rin said, "I don't think they are going out. Maybe they should, maybe they will or maybe they never will and eventually find a pair of girls who can accept the ridiculously closeness they share and settled down with said girls. But right now, there is only one person Makoto could be thinking of to bring out that look of love and that's Haru," and admitting that kind of hurt but what else was new. Thinking of Haru, Makoto and Nagisa did have a habit of making Rin's heart hurt.

"Speaking of Haruka-senpai," said Gou, "I think he's about to pull something."

Sure enough, on cue Haru started stripping for a nearby fountain. "Haru!" screamed the flustered Makoto and ditching the set ran forward to stop his friend from doing something that was going to get him kicked out of the park.

"I swear he does it just to gain Makoto-senpai's attention," said Gou.

"Of course he does," said an exasperated Rin before starting to wander off, "I am going to the restroom."

"We'll wait here!" called back Nitori. Rin was kind of relieved. He liked Nitori more or less but he would have been really creeped out if Nitori had suddenly decided he needed the restroom too.

* * *

Just as he got out, Rin got a text that the the director had called a short break so Hinamori could calm down and collect herself and Makoto could take Haru to the indoor wake-pool to calm him down. Rin texted back that he was going to walk around a bit and would meet-up with them later. Rin spent about ten minutes randomly walking around when he unexpectedly came across Makoto, alone, leaning against a tree. He looked exhausted.

Rin wasn't sure what possessed him but he snuck-up behind Makoto and called his name softly. As soon as Makoto turned a bit, Rin leaned forward and pretty forcefully kissed Makoto on the lips. Makoto was too stunned to react at first but then quickly broke and kiss and demanded, "Rin! What was that for?" he wondered.

Rin blinked, no anger, just confusion, "Really Makoto, just a little anger would be nice."

"Ha?"

"I just forced a kiss on you and all you are is confused? That's just wrong!"

"I don't get it," replied Makoto honestly.

"Makoto, you are now part of the cut throat hyper sexual world of fashion. You really should be more on your guard and not let random people kiss you."

"But you are not a random person," Makoto pointed out.

"That doesn't mean you can trust me. I mean, for all you know I dream of nothing but tying you up and raping you. You can't really trust anyone Makoto. Not teammates, not teacher and certainly not coaches."

"Teammates, teachers and Coaches?"

Shit, thought Rin. He had meant to just say the generic friends and family.

"Rin, did something happen?" asked Makoto gently, "I mean, your mind seems to be running along one very specific track. I mean, this is the second time you suggested I might become a rape victim and last time, you suggested I fit some sort of profile for a rape victim. What's up?"

Rin turned away, and seemed to change the subject, "Where's Haru?"

"At the wake pool," replied Makoto, "I left him there with Nagisa, Rei and my sibling, Ren and Ran. I have to go back to the set. Hopefully Hinamori-chan will have settled down and we can wrap things up. Haru is pretty upset."

"I would be too if my boyfriend was being clung to by a ditzy girl who couldn't even remember simple lines," replied Rin.

Makoto didn't even bother pointing out Haru and he were not going out, Rin knew that perfectly well afterall, instead Makoto said, "Hinamori-chan is not a ditz. She's a very nice girl who is just having a bad day."

"Sure, sure," said Rin, "By the way, hope that kiss I gave you wasn't your first."

"No," replied Makoto, blushing slightly as he looked away.

"Let me guess, Haru."

Makoto blushed more, "Everybody was talking about first kisses a lot in middle school and silly me started freaking out about it. Wondering if I would ever get to kiss anyone, wonder if I would mess-up. So one day Haru just kissed me and said, that now that we were each others first - I could stop thinking so much about it," Makoto laughed, "Shortly after I started dating Zaki-chan, who ironically was probably the one girl I could have had my first kiss with without you know, embarrassing myself."

"Zaki? You mean Yazaki Aki from our class and swimming club," Makoto nodded, Rin was surprised, "Haru was okay with this."

"Why wouldn't he be?" wondered Makoto, "It was Zaki-chan. I mean, she loved us both, me and Haru but was with me because… well Haru's Haru. But she understood our relationship and never got in the way. In fact it was the opposite, she rounded us off. It was nice."

Now that Rin thought about it, Zaki was probably the only girl Makoto could date without Haru getting jealous or Haru could have dated without breaking Makoto's heart. "Why did you guys break-up?"

"We had no choice," replied Makoto, "Her father worked at the same company as Haru's father and they were both transferred at the same time. Haru stayed, Zaki didn't. I didn't think it was fair to tie her down in a long distance relationship so we broke-up. I miss her sometimes." admitted Makoto sheepishly.

"My first kiss was with a girl called Anne," replied Rin, "When I got to Australia my english was good enough to be a understood but needed to be a lot better. One of the teachers jokingly suggested I get a Australian girlfriend so I can improve my english quickly. I took the suggestion seriously and first chance I got, I confessed to who I thought was the cutest girl in class. That was Anne. She had eyes like Haru's but smiled like you and she was overflowing with energy just like Nagisa. She also swam breast like Nagisa and like you used to. I was genuinely in love with her."

Rin sighed before continuing, "We were together for a long time for mere kids dabbling in their first love. But after… after I couldn't beat Haru I… I focused so much on training that I didn't have any time for her. Eventually we decided to break-up but before we did, we decided to be each others first time. I mean, we loved each other and so why not? After that, I didn't have any proper relationships. I mean, I hooked-up a lot but it was mostly stress relief, occasionally it was fun and I actually cared about the person I was doing it with. Most of the time I didn't even care who was under me or for that matter, what gender they were." Rin stopped and wait for Makoto to say something.

Makoto didn't but wordlessly encouraged Rin to keep going, keep talking and maybe finally, finally let his old friend back into his heart, "I was so focused on training, on improving and my distant goal of the olympics that at times seemed so, so unreachable that I didn't notice… but we weren't friends anymore… but we were teammate and I did still care about her…" Rin closed his eyes as his shoulders slumped, "About six months before I returned to Japan, Anne suddenly asked me to take her out on a date. To pretend for one night that we were still together, that we hadn't broken-up over swimming."

"I was surprised but I agreed. We had a good time and it really was like we had never broke-up. At the end of the night she kissed me and said that she wished it was real, the fact that we hadn't broken-up and were still together. But that she understood that I had a dream that I had to run towards with all my might. She wished me good luck and told me she'll be watching for me to not only get to the Olympics but win medals by the bucketload. It felt like farewell but I couldn't bring myself to question her, she seemed so sad." Rin sighed again, "Three days later, she killed herself."

"Wait what!" cried Makoto, he was not expecting the story to take this turn.

"In her suicide note she talked about how she had been repeatedly raped by her breaststroke coach. But how nobody believed her. Not her parents, not the school and not even her teammates and friends. When she tried to go to the police directly, the school had threatened her… well… with me."

"You?"

"Remember how I said I hooked-up a lot? That wasn't exactly keeping with school or swim team policy. All the students had to sign a code of conduct that said we had to act morally all the time. Casual indiscriminate hook-ups aren't exactly going to win you prizes for morality. The school turned the other cheek if you kept up your grades and kept winning medals and trophies but I wasn't one of their stars. They could afford to sacrifice me."

"But the people you did it with…"

"It was probably a hollow threat if you think about the collateral damage," said Rin, "Alternatively, they could have sacrificed some mediocre swimmers to expel me and thus carry out their threat. Whatever the truth, Anne believed them and since she still cared about me, she kept silent until she just couldn't."

Rin laughed a hollow painful laugh, "Even at the end she didn't name me by name, just said something like 'the only person she still cared about'. I knew it was me because that's what she had told me during our last date, that I was the only person she still cared about…"

"Makoto," Rin gripped his shirt, near his heart as he continued, "If I don't make it to the Olympics… it would all have been for nothing. My mother, my single mother is drowning in debt from paying for my schools, my training. By the time my grandmother died, she had already spent just on me the inheritance meant for both myself and Gou. Anne actually died trying to protect my dream and I…" still can't move forward.

Rin took a deep breath and released it slowly, "Point is Makoto, you can't trust anyone," said Rin as he slowly turned to face Makoto, "You are an angel and you'll be playing with devils. They will want to tear out your wings and rip away your halo if only for the hell of it. They won't need any reason beyond that but if they wanted more reasons, I am sure they could find them. Jealousy, envy, lust…" Rin smirked, "I know because I am one of them."

"You are not," said Makoto firmly.

Rin laughed dismissively, "I think you are meant to be on set."

Makoto yelped and checked his phone, sure enough there were texts demanding to know where he was. "I'll see you later Rin!" Makoto called as he ran.

"Yeah," said Rin. He stayed where he was for a few minutes to compose himself, before checking his own phone and heading to meet-up with Gou and the others.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Yazaki Aki or Zaki-chan is a character from High Speed! the prequel novel to Free! that is focused on the elementary school relay that keeps getting reference in Free! Zaki of course doesn't appear in Free! but I think if she had, she would definitely have been a love interest for either Makoto, Haru or Rin. Most likely Haru who nearly drowned trying to retrieve her scarf and despite her white scarf becoming horribly discoloured, Zaki kept wearing it. So yeah, I am not making her up.

Anyway, I don't normally do this but I got anonymous review for chapter 2 and 3 that I feel I should address. Reviews,

Guest 9/5/13 . chapter 2

Hahahaha oocness abounds! Also, Makoto as a model is not really believable. *shrugs*

Guest 9/6/13 . chapter 3

Oh man, this chapter didn't do you any favors in making things better. I wanted to enjoy it but I just can't take it serious with the horrible oocness and unbelievability. You write well but this fic is not a great example of that I'm afraid. :/

My first reaction was "but I worked really hard to keep people in character!" But then it occurred to me that this is a fic that's probably impossible to write without making Rin, Haru and Makoto out of character. So my apologies for the out of character-ness. I'll do my best however to keep everybody's "core" correct. Nothing to say about not believing Makoto as a model. I mean, it might just be my "Makoto is awesome" goggles but that's pretty much the cornerstone of this fic. If you can't believe Makoto can be randomly scouted and be someone people would go "I want him to model for my magazine" or "I want him in my ad" then well, this is not the fic for you.


	5. Chapter 5

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Yamagami Shiori was a manager of considerable talent, which was a good thing because her cold, calculating and manipulative nature did not make her friends. She liked making stars more than working with stars. The reason was simple enough. She hated dealing with the insufferable egos stars tended to develop as they become successful and tended to drop her charges as soon as they started acting like entitles divas. Yet Tanaka Lory had specifically requested her to be Makoto's manager and the photographer Hayate Asami, who had the dubious title of being Shiori's only friend, had agreed.

Shiori herself had been reluctant. She already had four other charges with two of them had just recently had a breakthrough and she was busy trying to help them build upon their successes. She had gathered from Asami that Makoto was not interested in modelling per say and so Shiori had concluded that Makoto was just in it for the money. Shiori had better things to do then work with a person who had no passion for the craft they were engaged in. However, Asami and Tanaka had insisted and finally her boss had just ordered her to work with Makoto, at least for the time being.

Having worked with Makoto for couple of months now, she was willing to admit she had been wrong. Very, very wrong. Makoto was too humble to realise the full extent of his own appeal and as a result, the fact that modelling might be a career option for him never occurred to him. However, now that he was modelling, he was taking his job seriously. At least, Shiori thought unamused, when he was actually taking jobs. If there was one thing Shiori hated about Makoto, it was how he refused to take his foot out of Iwatobi. He was still enrolled in Iwatobi High, still returned home after almost every job, even though he now had an apartment in Tokyo and there was Nanase Haruka. Just thinking of Haruka gave Shiori a headache. But at least Haruka was a good bargaining chip because unlike what Shiori had first assumed, Makoto wasn't all the interested in the money.

O he liked the fact he was earning a lot more money than he was from his previous part-time jobs working at beach shacks, hauling fish back in Iwatobi and he spent what he earned generously on his friends and family, keeping for himself the bare minimum he needed to pay for his Tokyo apartment (a six tatami dump far, far, far below what Makoto could afford), Tokyo living expenses and this train tickets back and forth between Tokyo and Iwatobi. But what it did mean was that Shiori could not dangle large paychecks in front of Makoto to get him to take more jobs or specific jobs she thought he should take. Not if it meant Makoto would have to stay in Tokyo for more than a week at a time. Since Makoto wasn't interested in the fame aspect of modelling either, Shiori was forced to use Makoto's love for his friends and family, more specifically Nanase Haruka, to get him to dance to her tune.

Right now Shiori's was using the soon to open Dubai underwater hotel to get Makoto to do his first catwalk show. Valentines day was coming-up and a bunch of designers and stores were doing valentines themes fashion shows all around Tokyo. It was a perfect venue to get Makoto some experience.

Shiori's bait to Makoto was quite simple, it would be about a month and a half until the underwater hotel in Dubai would open. To celebrate, the hotel was going to put on some shows, including hold a fashion program to show off their event facilities. Some of the Japanese fashion houses were more than keen to make further inroads in the Dubai fashion scene and had eagerly signed-up for show slots. If Makoto could prove he could work the catwalk, Shiori would do her best to get booked to walk the catwalk in Dubai and he could take Haruka with him. Of course staying at the underwater hotel was out of the question but she would get them on a VIP tour of the place and Dubai did have beachs. Needless to say Makoto took the bait eagerly.

And so here they were, at the first rehearsals for the catwalk show for one of the larger Tokyo retail chains which sold both daywear and evening wear, including some edgy stuff generally meant for clubs and stuff. Thus the creative director had come-up with the concept "Angels and demons" for the show and was explaining it to the models.

"First will come the angels," he was saying, "So you will all start off modelling the daywear, the kind of clothes you would wear to dates at an amusement park or to have coffee and other wholesome activities that your parents would totally approve of. Everybody will make one pass and then three of you, ah… Inoue, Kurosaki and Tachibana," Makoto jumped at the mention of his name, "Will make the final daywear pass and during this pass, the accompanying girls will strip off their daywear on stage to reveal their edgy, sexy and unangelic clubwear and will push the angels off the catwalk, and that's when the devils will appear and we'll start the clubwear modelling run. Inoue, Kurosaki and Tachibana will not be included in the devils but they would have made two passes as angels so it'll all be fair."

"How do we exit the stage after we are thrown off the catwalk?" asked Inoue, "Just get-up and run back."

"I was getting to that, you aren't actually going to be allowed to fall on the floor you know," the director pointed to three circular platforms at a slightly lower level than the catwalk, "You'll be 'pushed' on to those platforms and are to remain there for the rest of the show watching the devils like guys who have been dumped. In this show, we are trying to communicate that being an angel is not enough! You need to also have a dark side to hold on to the girl!"

Shiori rolled her eyes but she supposed as a fashion show concept it could have been worse. They started the rehearsal and Shiori switched all her attention to Makoto. He had been given a crash course in catwalk modelling last weekend. He had done his best to absorb everything but he clearly also practiced in his own time because he was walking well. He also did a convincing job of falling when he was "pushed" away by his date and… dear god what the hell was Makoto thinking of!

Shiori blinked as the look on Makoto's face fully registered. Inoue and Kurosaki wore looks of indignation and anger but not Makoto. He was still smiling but it was an absolute heartbreaking smile tinged with the sadness of rejection but at the sametime acceptance. Makoto was looking at the poor unfortunately girl who had, had to push him as if he was saying "its alright, I wasn't good enough. So it's alright, go on, be happy and…"

"I can't do it!" cried the girl Makoto had been paired with, "The internet will roast me alive if I dump Tachibana-san."

"What?" asked the irritated director, "What are you on about?"

"Look at his face," the girl said, "Any girl who dumped a man for such flimsy excuse as not dark enough is already not a nice person. But at least if the man was angry or something, it would be… I don't know better. But Tachibana-san is not angry! He's, he's… being supportive and encouraging! As if its somehow his fault that I am supposed to be a shallow idiot! I can't do it! No one woman in her right mind would ever dump Tachibana-san," Makoto blushed at the compliment but kept his silence as it was not his turn to speak.

"They would if they were into devils!" the director pointed out.

"Yes but then they wouldn't date him in the first place," the girl pointed out.

Director rubbed his forehead, "Tachibana-san can you please not um… give that look? Try and look angry or something."

"But would an angel be angry?" wondered Makoto. Fair question, Shiori thought.

"Now that you mention it," said Inoue, "Tachibana is right. I was just being myself and I would be angry if I got suddenly dumped like that for a crappy reason. But an angel or a person with good traits like an angel probably would be more understanding."

The director huffed, "Just look sad! That's enough for the purposes of the show," they all agreed and the rehearsal resumed. Unfortunately, Makoto had decided to go for the sad kicked puppy look for the 'just look sad' instruction and this time the girl outright asked to be swapped out. It took awhile before a director could find a volunteer among the girls who was comfortable enough to 'dump' Makoto on stage.

"You are going to get eaten alive by his fangirls you know," Shiori heard one of the girls tell Makoto's new partner backstage.

"I know but at least they will be talking about me. That's enough for now, " she replied. Smart girl, thought Shiori.

She finally located Makoto, who was typing something on his phone, "Chatting with Haruka," she guessed.

Makoto smiled, "Just letting Haru-chan know how today went."

"Does he reply?" Nanase Haruka did not strike Shiori as someone who talked a lot, even via text.

"Not to every text," admitted Makoto, actually Haru generally sent one email at the end of the day and it wasn't particularly long but it never failed to make Makoto's day, "But that's okay. I feel better just letting Haru-chan know what's happening."

Shiori had nothing more to say on the topic of texting, "Let's get going," she said, "I'll drop you at your apartment."

"Thanks Shiori-san," said Makoto with a smile.

They headed to Shiori's car, "What were you thinking about?" Shiori asked, "When you made that face? I mean, I doubt you have ever been dumped."

"Ah well, I have only had one girlfriend and we, ah, broke-up because we had to," explained Makoto, "So I guess that doesn't really count as being dumped. I mean, we both cried and wished we could be still together. But she was moving away and I had to let her go. I guess I was thinking of her a little," admitted Makoto, "Having to let go of a person because it wasn't fair to keep them caged out of your needs but I also thought of what it would be like if Haru-chan ever got sick of me. I worry about that a lot. Haru deciding he didn't want me around," Makoto got that look again, a look of sad resignation and acceptance, "I want Haru to be happy, always and if that means I have to leave his side and never show my face to him ever again… well…" Shiori was certain that the smile on Makoto's face was the saddest thing she had ever seen.

Flipped out her phone and took a picture. "Hey!" protested Makoto.

"Needs to go in your portfolio," said Shiori indifferently, "Well obviously my phone's photo quality won't be good enough. But next time we can book in some studio time with Asami to take some independent shots, we'll try to recreate this face and get it properly captured. So this is a reference shot," Shiori explained.

Makoto huffed. But he didn't mind working on his portfolio because he usually did it with Haru. They had put one, a digital portfolio using the talent agencies special software and published through the agency for potential clients to browse, together some months ago but it had to be constantly updated as new shots were added to Makoto's library. Makoto had a habit of just shoving everything in. Haru had a better eye for the whole thing, thinking about themes and grouping things together based on the themes. He was also good at leaving stuff out. Makoto sighed, he missed Haru.

* * *

You would think that as an introvert, Haru would handle his separation from Makoto better but he wasn't. He missed Makoto constantly. Everyday he would get-up and check his phone to see if there was a text from Makoto telling him he was heading home. Haru had also gotten in the habit of carrying his phone and the habit of checking it frequently throughout the day. It usually had a message from Makoto.

Heading to the first catwalk rehearsal. Wish me luck.

"Good luck," this one Haru actually texted to Makoto, getting a smiley face in return.

I am going to get dumped live on stage! The catwalk concept is angels and devils. I am an angel who is going to get dumped for a devil. I am supposed to be sad about it and so I thought of something really sad. But it upset the girl who was paired with me. :( I guess I should think of something less sad than Haru-chan leaving me forever.

"Idiot," thought Haru, "As if that would ever happen." Although Haru didn't bother texting that.

Catwalk show rehearsal just wrapped-up. Heading back to the apartment. Wish I was going home instead. I miss Haru-chan.

"Then come back already," Haru thought but this too he didn't text. Damn. Haru didn't think he was capable of feeling lonely but there it was. He was lonely. The last text for the day Haru received from Makoto was just before bed. It read simply,

Good night, Haru-chan. I miss you.

"Then come back already," Haru couldn't hold back this time and ended up texting his desire.

I will soon.

For Haru, it could not be soon enough. Haru sighed and reached for the printout Gou had given him. It had the instructions on taking part in the swim trials for the national team. Gou had already signed him up for the swim trials and was encouraging him to go and not pullout. She wanted Haru there chiefly because she thought it would motivate her brother to do his best, since Rin had a dark sort of obsession with Haru that he will never fully get over. But to Gou's credit, she wasn't just thinking of her brother and genuinely believed it would be good for Haru to just go and try.

Haru didn't really care about making the National Team but he knew Makoto wouldn't be able to return until after valentines day. That was two weeks away. If he went to the trials, he would have an excuse to be with Makoto, to crash at his apartment. Haru decided he was going to go. He would take the trials seriously of course. It would be an insult to the water if he entered it half-heartedly but he wouldn't lie to himself. This time, being in the water was secondary to being with Makoto.

"I am coming to Tokyo," he texted to Makoto, "I want to take part in the swim trials to get into the national team training program. Let me crash at your place," Haru didn't need the ecstatic reply to know Makoto would be delighted to have him.

* * *

**Author's Note:** So I decided on a time frame for this fic. Assuming the Free! series is set in this year, which I think it is, Makoto got scouted roughly in October 2013. This chapter is set February 2014 and I am thinking that the remaining chapters of the fic will stretch until October 2014 because October 2014 is when the Asian games are going to be held in South Korea.

Asian games would be one of the international competitions Rin would have to perform well in to be get on the radar of the Japanese Olympic Committee for the games in 2016. I roughly know what the last chapter is going to be like and for it to have the full impact, I think it would be fun to have Makoto, Haru and Rin in South Korea and some bad things to happen to Makoto. Look forward to it!


	6. Chapter 6

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

When Gou told Rin that Haruka would also be going to the national team trials, Rin didn't know how to react. Truth be told Rin was afraid, afraid that Haru who still trained half-assedly would go in and blitz his event and make it in while Rin himself, who had been working so hard wouldn't be able to make it. But this feeling, this fear, these thoughts of inadequacy were nothing new and Rin had gotten good at literally running them off. So he was running, doing extra laps of the campus than usual to calm himself down, strengthening his legs to heighten the one advantage he had over Nanase Haruka, a strong kick. It also helped that Rin had decided to concentrate mainly on butterfly.

Oh he would also be swimming the freestyle trials but they were going to be his secondary events. He just had to get into the training program afterall, once he got into the training program he would ask continue specialising in both butterfly and freestyle front crawl and see what the coaches said. But really, even excluding Haruka, with people like Mikoshiba around his chances of making the program through freestyle was very low. Whatever, butterfly was his stroke anyway.

He returned to the dorm of find Nitori reading something on his tablet while lying on his stomach in his bunk bed. "Welcome back, senpai," Nitori said as way of greeting, "I was just reading Tachibana-san's fan forums."

"He has a fan forum? Already?" wondered Rin, "Also, how did YOU know about it?"

"It recently started and doesn't have a lot of members," explained Nitori, "Just twenty or so people but they seem very enthusiastic and post everything they can find about Tachibana-san. They even posted some of the photos from the prefecture and regional tournaments. That's how I found them," Nitori went on to explain, "I am helping maintain our clubs website and we have a ping-back bot enabled for when people link to us. We had some pictures up that had Tachibana-san in them and they posted them on their site. I saw the ping-backs and saw we were being linked to a site called 'I love Mako-chan', so I checked it out."

Rin nodded, "Makoto's doing well then," he said, as he threw himself on his bed, feeling utterly exhausted.

"I don't know much about idols so I can't tell," said Nitori, "But these girls seem to think Tachibana-san is doing well for a model who only made his debut a few months ago. They think he'll explode soon and are rather proud that they are his first fans. I think one of the girls might be Tachibana-san's classmate. She seems to know him, know him and posted a whole bunch of stuff about him and Nanase-san. Actually she said some pretty mean things about Nanase-san."

"Haru?" Rin was surprised, "Why would anyone not like Haru? I mean, he doesn't talk much and doesn't suffer fools but he's very kind hearted. Makoto's not the only saint in that pair."

"Well she thinks Nanase-san is gay for Tachibana-san," said Nitori, "But she doesn't think the feeling is mutual since Tachibana-san had a girlfriend in middle school. A pretty serious and long term girlfriend, according to her. She think Tachibana-san isn't dating right now because he's still hung-up on her and because Nanase-san hogs all his time and attention and so keep Tachibana-san from moving on and getting a new girlfriend."

Rin snorted, "That girl is an idiot."

"Yeah, that's what I thought," said Nitori, "I mean, if Nanase-san is gay for anyone, it's probably senpai!"

"Huh!"

Nitori had not meant to say that out loud, "I mean… I mean… senpai and Nanase-san has such an intense relationship and its a… it sort of a… looks like a plot of a BL manga!"

"How do you know what the plot of a BL manga looks like?"

"Ah… I… I read them sometimes…," admitted Nitori, "Because they have good plots and stories sometimes! I specially like Senpai and Kohai stories!"

"Senpai and Kohai stories..." repeated Rin a tad suspiciously.

Nitori was mortified, he REALLY hadn't meant to let that slip. "It's not like I have a senpai I am in love with," Nitori insisted loudly, rather happy that he was sitting on the top bunk and Rin was on the bottom bunk and thus could not see his cherry red face, "I just like the character dynamic of those types of stories! Because… because I have so many wonderful senpais that I could fall for… I mean if I was gay… which I am not!" he hastily added, "Not that I think there is anything wrong with being gay but I definitely like girls! Really!"

Rin sighed and decided to put Nitori out of his misery, "Nitori, enough," he said, "You don't have to justify yourself or your sexual preferences to me. You can be gay, straight whatever. Doesn't bother me. But just in-case that was a weird-ass confession," continued Rin as Nitori went still, "I'll tell you this. I am not interested in relationships with anyone at the moment."

"But… but would you date a… a man," wondered Nitori and was greeted with silence from the bottom bunk, "Ah sorry senpai! That was a really personal question! Please forgive me for overstepping my bounds. I just got carried away because we were talking about BL and…"

"I would date Makoto," Rin replied honestly, "Hell I could probably see myself dating Haru too. Although he would be an absolute pain to have as a boyfriend with his bullshit water fetish! But honestly, they are the only ones," said Rin, "I had a girlfriend whom I really loved. She… died."

Nitori gasped at that but Rin ignored him and continued, "But everytime I think back at what we shared I get warm and fuzzy inside. I would like to feel that again. Makoto," Rin let himself smile because he knew Nitori couldn't see him, "Makoto is the only person I can think of who would make me feel warm and fuzzy inside if we were dating. Maybe Haru could too but I can't be sure. Haru and I don't always get each other and end-up hurting each other without meaning to. So yeah, I would turn gay for Makoto."

Rin didn't bother mentioning that he had been with guys in Australia. Mostly because he hadn't really see those encounters as "gay", just as he hadn't seen his encounters with girls (apart from Anne that is) as "straight". They had simply been warm bodies that made him warm when he felt cold inside and out.

"Just… just Tachibana-san?" wondered Nitori, a little despondently.

"Just him," Rin emphasised.

"Then you should go for him!" said Nitori, "I will do my best to support and cheer you on!"

Rin laughed, "Didn't I say I wasn't interested in a relationship at the moment? Swimming first Nitori, swimming first. Besides, trying to win Makoto's heart would be a pain in the ass. A time consuming pain in the ass. Definitely something I don't have time for."

"But senpai if you wait…"

"Nitori, you misunderstand me," said Rin, "I am not in love with Makoto at the moment. Just saying he is someone I can see myself be in love with. I am not in love with anyone at the moment. So it doesn't bother me if Makoto ends up in a relationship by the time I get to a position when I am ready to start dating and stuff," Rin explained, "Who knows, I might have found someone more warm and fuzzy then Makoto by that time."

"I hope you do Senpai because I don't want Senpai to be cold," Nitori said sincerely.

"You too Nitori, you too," said Rin, having said and shared more than he had ever meant to, Rin let the conversation drop.

* * *

**Author's note:** I guess this is what you would call a "filler" chapter. But Rin did say one thing in this chapter that's going to be very important when the proverbial "shit hits" the fan (currently actually thinking of all manner of dramatic scenarios involving Makoto). So it's not a totally filler!


	7. Chapter 7

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Makoto: I can't wait for you to get here Haru-chan. It'll be a like a sleepover that lasts two weeks or maybe it's more like camp. ^.^

Haru: I am bringing Mackerels and borrowing a sleeping bag from your parents.

Makoto: Ah! But I already bought a futon for Haru-chan! I am also going tomorrow with one of the girls from the talent agency to buy fresh mackerels for Haru.

Haru: Don't do anything unnecessary. Especially with random girls.

Makoto: Are you jealous? ^.^

Haru: No

Makoto: ^.^ Megumi-san practices LOHAS. She's going to help me buy fresh organic mackerels. She says it more delicious than ordinary mackerels. So I thought I would get some for you.

Makoto: I'll grill some for you or would you rather have it cooked in miso?

Makoto: Haru-chan's not responding.

Makoto: Let me guess, you are thinking "Makoto you idiot, mackerel is just mackerel"

Makoto: Haru-chan, I can't keep reading your mind from this distance you know.

Haru: So I win!

Makoto: Lol, are we playing that game again? You still haven't explained the rules to me.

Haru: You read my mind, I win if you fail or aren't 100% accurate.

Makoto: Can I even win this game?

Haru: If you are losing it just means you are not paying enough attention to me!

Makoto: Lol, I suppose that's fair.

Haru: Did you contact Aki?

Makoto: Why would I contact Zaki-chan?

Haru: You miss her don't you? And you are in Tokyo, she's in Tokyo and…

Makoto: Are you trying to set me up?

Haru: No.

Makoto: Haru-chan...

Haru: I don't want you to have regrets.

Makoto: I don't have any regrets. Not about Zaki-chan. I miss her but not enough to drop into her life and see if she's single and still has a soft spot for me.

Haru: Do you want a new girlfriend?

Makoto: Where are these questions coming from?

Haru: sends link to fan forum post

Makoto: Oh Haru-chan! I am so, so sorry! I am so sorry you got dragged into this and they said such mean things about you! Honestly, you are not the reason why I don't have a girlfriend. I just don't know any girls I want to date. If anything, I am the one holding Haru-chan back!

Haru: I don't care what they say about me and I am happy with you.

Makoto: That makes me so happy! But how did you find that place?

Haru: Nagisa found it.

Makoto: So that's who BigCutePenguin is? The one who is defending you and tearing that poor girl apart.

Haru: He seems to be enjoying himself.

Makoto: He seems to be quite the troll… I mean he seems to be just bashing the poor girl at this point. I should tell him to stop. She said some mean things about Haru-chan but I am sure he made her realise her mistake 20 posts ago.

Haru: I'll tell him to stop.

Makoto: Thanks Haru-chan. I am looking forward to seeing you again.

* * *

Makoto met Haru at the train station late saturday night and that night Makoto cooked Haru some of the "organic" mackerel he had gotten, while Haru had a bath.

"Sorry the bath tub isn't very big," Makoto said when haru came out with a towel wrapped around his waist. Contrary to popular believe he did not always wear his swim suit or always wear his swim suit in the bath. In fact, since he started swimming again, he wore his swimsuits in the bath less and less.

"It's fine," he said, as he went to his bags and started taking his sleeping clothes out.

Makoto set the table while Haru got dressed. They sat down to eat and discussed their schedule for the coming two weeks, "I have two shows tomorrow," said Makoto, "Nothing big. Just something one of the bigger malls is putting on to entertain their customers and promote the cloths of the retailers. I do one at noon and another at 3PM, then I am free to do anything Haru-chan wants."

Haru nodded, "Kou got me into a gym nearby for the two weeks. I can train and swim there leading-up to the the trails."

"Great!" said Makoto, "I have a lot of shoots and other shows lined-up with the big one, the angels and devil show I was telling you about being schedule for the 11th. I have a few shoots after that but no shows. But I'll definitely be able to come watch you swim on the 13th."

"You don't have to," replied Haru, looking away slightly.

"I want to," said Makoto smile that smile he usually only smiles at Haru but this time Haru returned the smile. Making Makoto's heart jump and his smile bigger.

After dinner and the clean-up, they put away the table by resting it against the wall and laid out the futons side by side. They crawled in.

"I am cold," complained Haru.

"I am sorry," whispered Makoto, starting to get out, "I'll turn the heater back… Haru?" Haru had simply crawled onto Makoto's futon and under his quilt and then put his own quilt over both of them as he transferred his pillow so that it was mostly on makoto's futon with the spillage being on Haru's futon.

"It good like this," he said through an yawn.

Makoto smiled, "Okay, Haru-chan," he laid back down.

"I am glad Makoto doesn't have a girlfriend," Haru suddenly said.

"Huh? Why?"

"I would feel a little guilty if I did this while Makoto had a girlfriend," Haru confessed.

"But why? We are childhood friends. We have slept like this lots of time. Plus not like we are about to do anything perverted," Makoto pointed out, "We are just going to go to sleep."

"A girl might still get jealous," replied Haru.

"I wouldn't date a girl who got jealous of something like this," Makoto declared in a huff.

"Still," said Haru, "I am glad I don't have to share Makoto."

Makoto smiled at that but only said, "Goodnight, Haru-chan."

"Goodnight… Mako-chan," Haru replied in a tone that he would normally use to say drop the -chan.

But Haru's plan backfired because Makoto just laughed, "I feel like I am four again!"

"Idiot!"

* * *

"So what's the progress on Tachibana Makoto, Yamagami-san?" asked Shiori's boss.

"We have had good success so far," Shiori started, "Tomorrow he will be walking in the angels and devils valentines show. After that we have a few more shoots but then he's returning to Iwatobi for exams and to finish out the rest of his current school year. But he's returning during spring break for more shoots and a few shows."

"Is he transferring to Tokyo for his 3rd year? He should. This back and forth is limiting our potential to use him," her boss pointed out.

"No but that's not necessarily a bad thing. We don't want him over exposed," Shiori pointed out.

His boss made a noise that was semi-disapproving but didn't say anything. Instead he turned on a video recording of Makoto that they had made to showcase his TV commercial potential.

"Hi, I am Tachibana Makoto," Makoto was saying in the video with a huge smile plastered on his face, "I am 17 years old. I study at Iwatobi High and I am a member of the swim club. I have been swimming since I was about 8 years old. I really enjoy it. My best friend in all the world is a boy called Nanase Haruka. We have been friends for as long as I can remember. He is a swimming prodigy. I am not a prodigy though. In fact, I am a little afraid of the water but especially of the ocean," his face and smile took on a achingly vulnerable quality, "That's why I swim the backstroke, its good for people who are afraid of the water."

Cheering back-up, "I don't have any special talents but I can sing a little and play the guitar. I enjoy music very much and its one my best subject along with maths. But then maths and music are related so that makes sense. But my absolute best subject is Japanese Language."

Someone off camera asked Makoto to sing something. Makoto looked embarrassed and protests he's not that good but after a little pressing says, "Well I wrote a song for our middle school talent contest. I guess I can sing that. Since I wrote it, I won't be insulting anyone by singing it badly," he said with an apologetic smile. Then taking a deep breath he started,

Kokoro wo saa / ashita he tsunagu you ni

Egaite motto motto / jiyuu na jounetsu de

Oretachi nara / dokomademo ikeru

Shinjite mezashite susundeku / sorezore no sutorooku

Kitto shizen na nariyuki de

Dakedo, kou nareba ii na to omotta yo

Minna to tsukutta kono basho ha

Dare hitori kaketa tte nanika chigatteta ne

Shiori's boss paused the video and leaned back on his chair, "How is someone this ridiculously talented, this ridiculously unaware of his own talents?"

"I think he knows at some level," said Shiori, "Nor else he wouldn't have mentioned he could sing but the humility is genuine. Makoto meant it when he said he choose to sing one of his own songs because he wouldn't insult anyone by butchering their song. But probably because we unexpectedly asked him to sing. If we gave him time to prepare, I think he would have sang whatever we gave him."

The boss nodded and unpaused and video. Listening to the rest of the song. When Makoto finished the off screen voice asked him if he won the talent contest back in Middle school, "I did with Haru-chan," he said with a big smile, "I was going to sing alone because Haru-chan didn't want to take part but I really wanted to win the playstation 3 for my siblings. But then Haru-chan agreed to do a duet with me and we ended-up singing a different song and winning!"

"I was really glad," Makoto continued, "I don't think I would have won without Haru-chan."

Shiori's boss paused his video again, "This Haru-chan…"

"Annoying obstacle or good leverage," said Shiori, "He tends to oscillate between the two on a daily bases."

"Not what I was going to ask," replied the boss, "I mean, are they… involved?"

"Absolutely not!" said Shiori a little annoyed, "They are just best friends."

"Oh good," said the boss, "We want the fangirls to think they have a chance with 'Mako-chan'. Do let Tachibana know we prefer he NOT be dating at the moment and if he absolutely has to date someone, girl or boy doesn't really matter, he has to be super discreet!"

"I'll let him know but I don't think there is any danger of him dating," said Shiori, "He's… too picky," but then she thought for a moment, "Although I am yet to meet Mr Shark-teeth so maybe I shouldn't get too ahead of myself. "

"Mr Shark-teeth?"

"I can't remember his name or if I was even told his name, just that Asami said he had shark like teeth," explained Shiori, "He punched Tanaka when Tanaka came on too strongly with Makoto during their first meeting and then came with Makoto to Asami's studio. But I have never met him. Not even during the amusement park shoot - during which I pretty much got to meet almost everybody important to Makoto."

Her boss did not look happy, "Find out who this shark-teeth person is and if he's something we have to manage. Tachibana could be big and very profitable for our agency. I don't want to be blindsided by anything. New talent, Yamagami-san, new talent is like a fragile bud that can be easily trampled on."

Shiori nodded in agreement, like she always did when her boss brought-up the "new-talent is like fragile flower" analogy. They turned to the other talents under Shiori's charge.

* * *

At about the time Shiori was meeting with her boss. Mr Shark-teeth aka Matsuoka Rin found himself staring-up at a billboard showing Makoto pulling on a clean white shirt while walking. It was supposed to advertise a body spray but it took Rin full 5 minutes to tear his eyes away from Makoto and pay attention to the rest of the billboard to pick-up on that.

Rin swore under his breath as he finally turned away and headed to the restaurant that had been recommended to him, "Yep," he found himself thinking, "If I had the time to be dating, I would definitely turn gay for Makoto."

* * *

**Author's note:** Sorry for typos and stuff. Didn't have time for clean-up and if I don't post it now, I wouldn't be able to post it for a bit. Also, obviously all celebs have their image controlled to a certain degree but I gather they control celeb images a great deal in Japan. But I will be taking liberties with both the swimming and celeb world because I am not 100% on either. Especially for the swimming where I will be borrowing a lot from how they do things in Australia.


	8. Chapter 8

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer**: I own nothing!

* * *

_I know you are busy with swim trials but if you have some time I have a big fashion show on the 11th. Haru will be there. Three of us could go for dinner after, maybe?_

It was the 10th and Rin had just finished his butterfly trials. He won his heat, as well as his quarterfinals and semifinals but only managed to come second after the current national high school butterfly champion. Rin had not competed in the butterfly during the last high school tournament, obsessed as he had been with beating Haru in the 100m freestyle. So he had not gone head to head with the 3rd year before. Rin knew he was good but still losing stung.

However, 2nd was still good enough to move on to the next round and the next round was extensive round of medicals, which included both a physical and a psychic evaluation. There would also be interviews to gauge his level of commitment and other things. Currently the "other things" part was worrying Rin because apparently the national team was concerned about burn-out, having lost a couple of promising athletes, on whom a lot of time and money had been spent, in the past year to burn-out. So they wanted new athletes who were going to be accepted into the program to have a bit more "balance".

At least that's what Rin had heard from Mikoshiba who had gentle pointed out to Rin on the train from Iwatobi that Rin's life was basically school, swimming and more swimming with little outside interest and that might not go down too well this year. Rin had protested that he could chill with the best of them and wind down with friends all the time. Mikoshiba had challenged him to name one instance of when Rin was "chilling", Rin mentioned the day at the amusement park with Nitori, Gou and Gou's friends. Mikoshiba was incredulous and being Mikoshiba had actually called Nitori then and there to confirm. Rin had been annoyed but at the sametime grateful that he had not been pressed to name a second day of fun because Rin didn't have one.

What would happen if the Swim team management actually did press him to name some interests outside of swimming? Rin signed and texted back, "I'll be there. I am dropping out of the Freestyle trials anyway. So after a few administrative stuff tomorrow, I am done."

There, now he could honestly answer the damn management that he hung-out with friends in totally non-swimming related places like fashion shows with a straight face and even give a specific example to convince them that he wasn't lying and just telling them what they wanted to hear. He would also mention his love of reading and watching english movies and surely that was more than enough?

As these thoughts swirled his Rin's head, he received a reply from Makoto, _Congratulations! That was from both me and Haru. See you tomorrow!_

"How did you know I did well?" Rin texted back.

_You dropped out of the freestyles and have admin stuff to do. Haru told me the process. You wouldn't have to do admin stuff if you hadn't done well._ Makoto replied back.

Right, it was a straightforward deduction when Rin thought about it. "I am not in yet. Management still have to approve me but I am a step closer," Rin replied back.

_You'll get in!_

For some inexplicable reason. That simple reply made Rin really, really happy. "A crap," he found himself thinking as he tossed his phone away, "This is so not a good development," he rolled over and buried his face in his pillow. But the happy feeling refused to go away. Well, at least he was no longer stressed and nervous.

* * *

"Absolutely no stripping and jumping into the fountains," Shiori warned Haru as they got closer to the show venue. Haru rolled his eyes as Makoto sniggered.

"I mean it!" said Shiori, "I bought handcuffs!"

"Handcuffs?" asked Makoto suddenly alarmed.

"Yes handcuffs," said Shiori, "I am fully prepared to handcuff Nanase-kun to the nearest fixed railing if he does not behave!"

"Please don't do that," begged Makoto, "Haru will be good, won't you Haru?"

"Depends," replied Haru, deadpan.

"On what?" wondered Makoto, getting slightly alarmed.

"On how pretty the fountains are," answered Haru with a mischievous grin.

"Haru!" whined Makoto. But Haru only smiled as Shiori seriously contemplated using the handcuff.

Rin was waiting for them at the venue. One look at his teeth and Shiori figured out Rin was Mr Shark Teeth. She immediately started to observe him closely but he just seemed like a mutual friend and so she relaxed. Rin was not an issue that needed managed. At least at this stage.

"You have an hour or so before you have to go backstage," Shiori told Makoto, "Enjoy yourself but don't wander too far and keep your phone close."

* * *

Rin was worried that things between the three of them would be awkward. He underestimated Makoto's power of conversation and Haru's power of silence. They got drinks, which Makoto insisted on paying for. Found a fountain they could sit near. Haru gently played with the water as Makoto asked Rin about his trial experience. Rin described his results briefly and talked a bit about the interviews he had, had that morning.

"You may want to dial down the water fetish for the interviews, Haru," Rin advised Haru, "I am not sure how, 'I just want to feel the water' would go down with management."

Haru gave Rin a look that Rin couldn't begin to fathom. So Makoto translated, "Haru-chan wouldn't want to swim for people who didn't understand his love of water."

"I suppose its not a big deal for you," conceded Rin, "Actually, come to think of it. The fact that dreams of olympic glory don't get you up in the morning is likely to be a bigger hindrance for you. If I was sitting in the panel judging your fitness for the National Team, I would seriously worry about your motivation."

Haru shrugged. "I don't think it really matters to Haru," Makoto elaborated on the shrug, "I think Haru just wants to see how far he can go. But that's a kind of motivation too, isn't it?" adding his own thoughts, "I mean, a medal is a nice concrete goal but there is something to be said about a more abstract goal of 'doing my best'. At least that's what I think."

This time Rin shrugged dismissively before segwaying, "You know, Haru, I always wanted to know, what the hell would you do on dates? You can't take Makoto with you to translate for you."

"I talk," Haru mildly protested, "Besides, isn't listening more important on dates?"

"First date maybe," said Rin, "But even then you are supposed to get to know each other. But if only the girl talks, she's not going to learn anything about you."

"I wouldn't date a stranger," replied Haru.

"Even if you dated a friend you would still have to learn to connect as a couple," Rin pointed out, "Besides, you aren't friends with any girls besides Gou and you can't date Gou," Rin informed him, "My sister is off-limits!"

"You should worry about Mikoshiba and Nagisa more than," replied Haru indifferently.

"Huh? Nagisa?"

Makoto laughed, "They can be cutely in-sync," admitted Makoto, "But I don't think its romantic. They are both just very enthusiastic and so are first to agree and react to each others suggestions. But we all get pulled along by their overflowing energies."

"Nagisa doesn't have enough muscles for her anyway," Rin commented, "Seriously though, Haru," Rin said as he returned to teasing Haru, "What are you going to do once you start dating?" Haru choose not to answer.

Rin turned to Makoto, "Eh…" Makoto stared at Haru for sometime before venturing, "Haru's not interested in dating anyone…" offered Makoto slightly hesitantly.

"Like not now or like never?" wondered Rin, "I mean you aren't seriously going to spend your life like one of those loner shut-ins are you?"

This time Haru looked straight at him and said, "I have Makoto."

"Haru-chan…" whispered Makoto, smiling sweetly as Rin felt a small stab in his heart, "That makes me so happy! But…"

"So its official thing," wondered Rin, talking to distract himself and maybe make the pain subside, "You two are going to start dating and move in together and spend the rest of your life together and shit like that?"

Makoto sighed, "I don't think that's what Haru-chan meant," Haru flinched ever so slightly, which Makoto would have normally noticed but didn't on account of being preoccupied talking to Rin, "Well not exactly anyway. I mean, I want to be best friends with Haru until I die and I hate living in Tokyo while Haru is in Iwatobi. I am just too used to having Haru-chan live near enough to… look out my window and see his house at least. It would be great if we could always be together."

Both Rin and Haru stared at Makoto trying to decipher what he meant exactly because they both felt as if Makoto was on a totally different wavelength. "Wh… what?" wondered Makoto, "Did I say something wrong?"

Haru sighed, "You really are a wishy-washy guy, you know that Makoto."

"Eh?"

"Seriously," agreed Rin, "You could and totally do make people unconsciously fall in love with you and just as unconsciously break their hearts."

"Eeeh?"

"But it doesn't matter for now, I suppose," said Rin, feeling happy again upon concluding that Makoto was not in-love with Haru and thus fair game… if Rin was interested in dating, which he totally wasn't at the moment.

"Just don't remain wishy-washy forever," added Haru, deciding he was okay for the moment to let Makoto be surprisingly dense and imperceptive of Haru's feelings, "Or else you'll always get dumped for mackerels."

Before either Rin or Makoto could comment, Makoto's alarm went off and he excused himself to head backstage. Wanting to be where he was supposed to be at least 5 minutes early. Leaving Rin and Haru in a somewhat awkward silence.

After a moment, Haru broke the silence with a smile and said, "I am glad we are friends again."

Rin let out a sigh and smiled back slightly, "Yeah well, the night's just starting. Wait until after Makoto's show and dinner before deciding us being all friendly is a good thing. But," Rin added with a smile of his own, "So far, I am glad I came."

They made their way towards the stage and found their place. Soon after they were joined by Shiori looking somewhat concerned.

Haru looked at her questioningly while Rin straight-up asked, "Everything okay?"

"Yes and no," she replied, "I missed the dress rehearsal yesterday," she explained, "So I did not know where they were going to place the cameras for the webcast or, for that matter, the final walk pattern."

"Oh?" prompted Rin since so far Shiori had explained nothing.

"You'll see soon enough," said Shiori, "Just watch…" as she said that the music started and the show began.

* * *

**Author's note:** Thank you to everyone who reviewed. I really appreciate everybody's kind words!


	9. Chapter 9

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Back in Iwatobi, Nagisa, Rei and Gou gathered in Nagisa's house to watch the webcast of Makoto's fashion show. They had decided to make a night of it with pizza, popcorn and lots and lots of strawberry shortcakes.

"It's really amazing to think how far Makoto-senpai has gone in such a short time," comment Rei.

"It's also very sad," Nagisa piped in, "I don't like seeing Haru-chan sad and he would be sad if Mako-chan went away for good."

"I don't think Makoto-senpai would leave Haruka-senpai behind," protested Gou.

"Although if he did I would have Haru-chan all to myself!" said Nagisa enthusiastically but then quickly deflated, "A sad, lonely Haru-chan who wouldn't be very Haru-chan," suddenly Nagisa got determine and declared, "If Mako-chan hurts Haru-chan, I'll never forgive Mako-chan and avenge Haru-chan by destroying Mako-chan's reputations as BigCutePenguin!"

"Destroy his reputation with what?" wondered Rei, "Stories of his overwhelming kindness?"

Nagisa pulled a face, "I could spread rumours about how he's a scaredy cat."

"Wouldn't that just make him more adorable?" wondered Gou, "Like a big cuddly cute dog that's afraid of loud noises? Plus it's not like he's not brave. He might be afraid of ghosts and stuff but if his friends and family were in trouble or danger, he would totally jump in and protect them."

Nagisa pouted as Rei pointed out, "He did jump in and try to save me back during camp. Even though he's afraid of the ocean."

Nagisa was deflated for less than a minutes before his energy returned with a vengeance, "Well BigCutePenguin will find dirt on Mako-chan for Haru-chan's sake!"

"I am surprised you weren't banned from Makoto-senpai's fan forums after the prolonged trolling you engaged in," commented Rei.

"I was banned, I appealed!" explained Nagisa with a mischievous grin, "With cute pictures of Mako-chan from the swim club."

"That's just wrong," Rei opined.

"Oh!" exclaimed Gou, "It's starting!"

The show started with upbeat totally sugary sweet pop music as the stage was flooded with simulated sunlight as beautiful girls and boys walked the catwalk holding hands and looking like happy couples out for a strolled.

"Oh! There is Mako-chan!" cried Nagisa, "He looks good!" Indeed he did in stylish casual day wear holding hands with a happy smiling girl, his face was half turned towards her and half turned towards the audience and the camera but still managed to look as if he was giving all his attention to her, "I hope this is not upsetting Haru-chan!"

"Haruka-senpai is not that petty," replied Rei exasperated, "I mean, he likes to mess with Makoto-senpai but he wouldn't actually do anything to seriously sabotage Makoto-senpai's work."

"He did strip and create a minor scene during the amusement park commercial shoot," Gou pointed out.

"Makoto-senpai's manager, Yamagami-san, okayed that!" Rei revealed.

"Huh?"

"She was getting annoyed with Hinamori-chan's antics and told Haru-chan that if he felt like making a scene she wasn't going to complain this time," Nagisa piped in. "So Haru-chan did. Before he was just going to take-off and let Mako-chan finish-up," he paused and added, "Yamagami-san is kind of scary."

"But at least she has Makoto-senpai's back," said Rei, "Sort of… as long as he remains handsome, healthy and model quality at least."

"Oh Mako-chan is back!" and he was, in another smart casual day wear but this time the girl was wearing a trenchcoat of sorts and then, she suddenly whirled on Makoto and pushed him off the catwalk on a small platform directly facing the camera and the majority of the life audience, "Wha… what is she doing?" wondered Nagisa.

The girl's face took on a fierce look as she artfully stripped out of her trench coat and tossed it at Makoto's feet, revealing a skimpy clubwear in which she struck a sexy, confident pose as a guy also dressed in clubwear came-up and claimed her and they strutted down the catwalk and off again. But Nagisa, Rei and Gou were not watching her or her new partner. Their gaze was glued on to Makoto's face, Makoto's sad but understanding face and watched riveted as his hand seemingly unconsciously went to the discarded trench coat and caressed it…

"That's… that's so sweet!" exclaimed Gou, "He misses her!"

"I don't like that girl," said Nagisa, "How dare she dump Mako-chan."

"You guys are taking this show entirely too seriously," declared Rei.

"Rei-chan is so cold! I mean, look! Look at Mako-chan's face! It's making my heart hurt," Nagisa said in a mockingly sad voice.

Rei rolled his eyes, "Still," he added, "That was not beautiful."

* * *

Back in Tokyo, "What the fuck," said Rin, "What moron thought this was a good idea? I mean, I don't particularly want to buy any of these cloths if it'll attract shallow girls like that chick."

Haru nodded in agreement, "Makoto said there was going to be three people getting 'dumped on stage', so how come only he was dumped?"

Shiori replied grimly, "The creative director decided, quite accurately, that having three male models sit on their asses for the entire second half of the show was just a waste and decided to only have Makoto be dumped since Makoto looked weird in the club wear they wanted to showcase," she explained.

"Too masculine?" Rin guessed, eyeing the cloths the male models were wearing in mild disgust, "I guess Haru might look good in these. I would look ridiculous, my muscles would just bulge out and not in a good way."

"Pretty much," admitted Shiori, "On the upside, Makoto is spotlighted, on the downside, MAKOTO is spotlighted."

"I don't understand," commented Rin.

"Models are supposed to show off the cloths they are supposed to be promoting. They aren't necessarily supposed to attract attention to themselves in a way that detracts from the cloths," Shiori pointed out, "Right now, a significant amount of attention is on Makoto and due to the terribly shortsighted concept, a lot of people are feeling like you are Matsuoka-san. So right now, Makoto is a detrimental distraction to the show. That said," added Shiori, "He is following the script he was given and it is not his fault the show's concept was flawed from the start. Plus he's doing a great job selling that trench coat. Still..."

"This could hurt Makoto?" wondered Haru.

"You should almost happy," Shiori accused.

"I am not," protested Haru, adding, "I miss our normal lives but I don't want Makoto to get hurt."

"This is a double edged sword," replied Shiori, "We'll have to wait to see how it cuts."

* * *

Things were a bit tense backstage when Shiori went to collected Makoto. The director was seething and really, really wanted to take his disappointment out on someone. Preferably Makoto since it was clearly all his fault. But the director was rather afraid of Shiori, who had plainly called him an idiot before the show and more or less accurately predicted the topic that would dominate the show's hashtag on twitter during the second half of the show.

Sure enough, people live tweeting the show could only talk about Makoto during the "devil" portion of the show. On the upside, the trench coat that Makoto had so sadly caressed was totally sold out, with girls tweeting things like "I am going to wear it and imagine Mako-chan is caressing me!" or "Just managed to get my order in. Such a sweet coat, just like Mako-chan!" or "I had that coat from before but now I'll always think of Mako-chan when I wear it."

Plus deep down the director knew he was the one who had messed-up and so resorted to silently glare at Makoto. Who was looking downcast and apologetic. Shiori rolled her eyes and told Makoto to go have fun with his friends, "Do you need me to drop you back to your apartment?" she asked.

"No, no, we'll take the train," replied Makoto and with that Makoto went to find Haru and Rin. But Shiori lingered to have a word or two with the director.

* * *

"It's not your fault," Rin assured him as they ate ramen, "The concept was stupid."

Haru nodded, "I wouldn't buy any of those cloths."

"You don't date and I bet you have never been in a club," Rin pointed out, "You are not the intended audience."

"We went to a club once," said Haru.

"Please don't bring that up," protested Makoto.

"What happened?" asked Rin.

"Nagisa said a cool new dance club opened couple of town over," said Makoto, "And wanted us to sneak in. Haru agreed because supposedly being in the club made you feel like you were underwater due to the lighting. That part turned out to be true but what Nagisa hadn't told us was that it was a weird S&M dance club or something. There were half naked men wearing strange S&M themed leather cloths with gas masks! They kept coming on to me," Makoto added looking traumatised.

Rin howled with laughter, "Remind me never to take Nagisa's advice on anything."

"The lighting was still cool though," commented Haru quietly.

"When are you returning to Samezuka?" Makoto asked Rin.

"Tomorrow afternoon. You guys?"

"I have some photo shoots scheduled for tomorrow but then I am done. So I get to watch Haru-chan swim on the 13th," said Makoto, with a soft smile, "Hopefully Haru-chan will be called for medicals and interview. But whichever way, we should be heading back on the 14th. Just a matter of how late or early the train we take is."

"What happens if you get in?" asked Haru, realising he didn't actually know what getting into the national teams training program meant.

"I can stay enrolled in Samezuka and take part in their distance education program," said Rin, "But I would move into a dorm here and start training with the national team if I got in. Goal would be to secure a spot on the representative team for the Asian games. But our medal winning senpais from the last games are still with us. So it'll be an uphill battle."

"For what its worth, I'll be cheering for you!" said Makoto with a sweet smile.

"Thanks," Rin replied, trying not to betray how much it meant to him. Haru was caught-up in his own thoughts, but he opted not to voice them and more or less left the conversation to be carried on by Makoto and Rin.

Makoto ended-up paying for dinner too, which resulted in Rin insisting they get dessert at the train station and that he treat the other two too. Haru protested and they ended-up going halves on Makoto's cake, while paying for their own deserts themselves. As they parted to catch different trains Rin commented, "This was fun. Thanks for inviting me."

"Thanks for coming," Makoto said but Rin knew he was speaking for both himself and Haru because they were a pair and they approached the world as one more often than not.

Rin smiled and did not let depressing thoughts of how Haru and Makoto could not be easily broken-up cloud his mind. With swimming taking-up his time and being an uphill battle, he couldn't also take on the challenge of Makoto. So it didn't matter how hard he was falling for Makoto, it was a mute point. Still, he wanted to hangout again with both Makoto and Haru, and that was enough for now.

* * *

**Author's notes:** Basically the club Makoto was describing is the club from the ending music video, which does have some strange people dancing in the background.


	10. Chapter 10

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

"Are you upset about what happened at the show still?" asked Haru, later that night when they were in bed.

He was lying on his side on his own futon, watching Makoto who had his back to Haru. Makoto never slept on his side. Ever. So it was obvious to Haru that Makoto was anything but asleep.

"I… I am sorry I inconvienced people," replied Makoto, "And I am especially sorry that I won't be able to take Haru-chan to Dubai."

"Dubai?" Haru wondered.

"Ah… sorry, I hadn't mentioned anything before had I?" whispered Makoto, still not turning to face Haru, "Shiori-san said that if I did a good job she would try and get me a job in Dubai. It was a long shot and so I didn't want to say anything. But as I tried to do my best, I got kind of excited. It's kind of stupid and embarrassing when I think about it," he said with an awkward self deprecating laugh, "I mean, even if I got the job and asked you to come with me, you might not have wanted to, or just not able to come. But still, I dreamt of seeing Haru-chan swimming in a new sea, of taking Haru to see the Dubai underwater hotel and maybe plan how one day we might come back there and get to stay in the hotel. I bet staying in one of those rooms would be like living underwater!" he paused and added softly, "I really wanted to see what kind of face Haru would make in one of those rooms."

"Makoto… do you remember that orca plushie you had in Kindergarten?" asked Haru suddenly.

"Ah? Ori-chan? Sure I do. Ran claimed Ori-chan for herself but poor Ori-chan didn't survive long with her. Ran and Ren can be rough on toys," Makoto said with a small laugh. Haru though he detected a note of sadness. It made sense, Makoto was remarkable attached to things and though the practical side of him knew nothing lasts forever, he never let go of anything without a struggle.

Haru left his futon and crawled in with Makoto, "Haru-chan?" wondered Makoto, unused to this amount of physical affection from Haru.

"Do you remember what I said to you when you offered me Ori-chan to play with?" Haru asked.

Makoto had to think for a moment because he couldn't recall off hand what Haru was talking about but eventually he remembered a vague memory of tears and bullies and Haru protecting him in his own way and soothing Makoto's tears in a way only Haru ever could, "You would rather play with me," Makoto repeated what Haru had told him all those years ago.

"That's also true of the beaches of Dubai, underwater hotels and everything like that," whispered Haru, "I won't lie and say those things don't interest me. They do but I rather have Makoto."

"Haru…" before Makoto could continue his phone rang and shattered the peace of the room.

Both Haru and Makoto jumped. Instinctively Makoto reach for it, "It's Shiori-san," explained Makoto as he answered, "Shiori-san, what's the matter?" wondering what disaster had befalling for Shiori to be calling him at 11 PM.

"Are you a virgin?" she asked.

"Eh?"

"Have you kissed someone? Can you look like sex on two legs?" demanded Shiori impatiently, "It's late, Makoto, so just answer the questions."

His face burning bright and very mindful of Haru next to him, Makoto whispered, "I had a girlfriend remember Shiori-san. So… um… no to your first question and yes to your second and no idea to your third question," what on earth did sex on two legs even mean? Did it mean sexy? So… did she mean Makoto had to pretend to be like someone like… Rin?

"That's good enough I guess," she replied, "I am texting you a hotel location. But a car is being dispatched to pick you up but if it isn't there within 15 minutes, catch a taxi. Don't worry if you don't have the money for the taxi, the company will pay for it and so I'll meet you at the hotel entrance to settle the charge."

Makoto's head was spinning. He was tired, he wanted to sleep. It was cold. He didn't want to leave his bed, specially now that Haru was sharing it and making it even warmer and more comfortable. Especially for something that sounded like, "Is this a porn shoot?" Makoto blurted out.

Shiori huffed, "Don't be ridiculous!" and hung-up.

"Makoto?" asked Haru, his name layered with multiple unspoken questions.

"Haru-chan," whispered Makoto, "I am sorry but I have to go out again. They are sending a car. It seems I have another shoot."

"It's 11 PM and why did you mention porn?" wondered Haru getting-up.

"It… nothing," whispered Makoto, "Please go to sleep Haru-chan. You only have a day before your trials. You need your rest."

"Makoto…" don't go anywhere. Stay with me but if you can't, I'll go with you. Haru wanted to say all that but at the same time didn't want to say any of that. He didn't want to hold Makoto back. He didn't want to make Makoto feel guilty. He didn't want to lose Makoto. He hated this! Why the hell couldn't Rin punch that damn talent scout hard enough to make him lose consciousness? Why did Rin go with Makoto for those test shots? Why was Makoto so gorgeous? It was all so… unfair! "You are not allowed to do porn!" Haru said finally.

"Eh! I would never…" started Makoto.

"Or do nude shots! Not even your your back!" declared Haru.

"I wasn't going…"

"I mean it Makoto! You are absolutely not allowed to do those things!" Haru all but commanded.

Makoto breathed in deeply and let it out slowly, then he smiled, "I won't do anything Haru-chan doesn't want me to. Besides," he said with a laugh, "I want my parents and siblings to be able to see everything I do. So that pretty much rules out porn and nudes, even the artistic kind. It would be too embarrassing!"

"Good!" declared Haru as he went back to his own futon and pulled the cover all the way over his head.

Makoto dragged himself out of bed and started to get ready, "Good thing I am a teenage boy who is full of energy," thought Makoto.

The car came and driver, who looked exhausted and put-upon filled Makoto in on the nightmare shoot he was about to walk into. "It's supposed to be a simple shoot for a perfume!" explained the drive, "It's from a big European fashion house. So they flew in an actress from hollywood and wanted her paired with a Japanese actor. But the actress they got has a bad attitude and she was six hours late to the shoot. The Japanese actor they had, had to leave after four hours because he had other commitments but the actress is flying out tomorrow. So they called-up a bunch of up and coming models, actors, singers, whoever they thought was handsome and would look good next to the actress and would accept a last minute job because most established talents worth having would either be booked or reluctant to accept something on this short a notice. At least with a new talent, they can offer publicity for the talent and claim that they are highlighting up and coming Japanese stars as extra goodwill and publicity." explained the driver.

"But the director is demanding and is set on capturing the essence of seduction, whatever that mean, because the perfume is called seduction. He can't fire the actress so he's been cycling through the males. You are the 10th person I have picked-up today," said the driver, in an utterly exhausted tone, "I hope you know what the essence of seduction is because I am tired and would like to go home."

Makoto gulped. Essence of seduction? Makoto had not the foggiest clue. Although Shiori's questions suddenly made more sense. If he was a virgin or someone who had never even kissed anyone, he really would be out of his depths when it came to the essence of seduction. Although Makoto had never had to seduce anyone. Zaki had confessed to him and they had been friends for years before they got together. It was… it wasn't a seduction but friendship turning into something else or so Makoto had always thought.

Besides which, Zaki had been beautiful and earthly. His love life with Zaki had been sweet and grounded. It was always slow and… sensual might be the word that applied to how he and Zaki had made love. But surely that's not what was being asked for now. What had Shiori asked him? Can you look like sex on two legs... Sex on two legs? Once again Rin was the first person that popped into Makoto's head. Because Rin would be all passion and fire. He wouldn't need to know someone to make them burn and melt. Even the kiss Rin had stolen from him to make a point had burnt with heat and passion.

What about Haru? Makoto suddenly thought. Haru had given Makoto his first kiss and Makoto still remembered it vividly. There had been a certain amount of confidence behind it. Confidence that Haru would not be rejected and kissing Makoto was the most natural thing in the world. Makoto had felt as if he was swept-up in it, like a tide he could not resist but that made sense because Haru was like water. He went with the flow but when he was determined, he was like a wall of water that crushed away your resistance and he could sweep you along. He just choose not to. Was that the essence of seduction?

Or maybe it was all three, thought Makoto. Maybe it was comfort and sensuality of earth, the confidence and flow of water, the passion and heat of fire. Everything combined… but then again, Makoto wasn't any of those things. How did he kiss? How should he kiss? Why was he thinking of kissing when he didn't even know if kissing was required?

"We are here," declared the driver, "For both our sakes, good luck!"

"Thanks," managed Makoto as his nerves started to get the better of him. Then Shiori turned-up and dumped even more information on his overloaded brain.

"Sorry to call you out so late and after asking such suspicious questions," said Shiori, "But what was supposed to be a reasonably quick shoot that was to be wrapped-up shortly after noon is still going and looking like it might be a wash. I got pulled in just when I thought I was done for the day and they have already burnt through one of my talents. We were about to declare the shoot a wash and a waste of $10 million US when I remembered you. You are literally our last hope to salvage this."

"$10 million US!" cried Makoto.

"International company advertising their product using international talent so the contracts are in US dollars. The hollywood actress cost $6 million. The french director is charging $1 million, the Japanese actor who was scheduled to appear will still have to be paid his million. The rest of crew, the hotel, logistic, talents they didn't use but still have to pay something to for their time… actually the final tally will probably be more than $10 million US," explained Shiori, "You'll get slightly higher than scale rates for this shoot too but not much."

Makoto shrugged and put the thought of his pay out of his mind. He had other more pressing issues to deal with, "What do I have to do exactly, Shiori-san?"

"The perfume being advertised is Seduction for him and her," explained Shiori, "We are shooting one long scene that will become two ads. First half of the scene is for Seduction for her, the actress storms into the room as temptation, you are taken by surprise while undressing," Makoto gasped, Shiori quickly clarified with a smile, "Don't worry, you'll just be undoing a tie and unbuttoning a few buttons when she storms in and starts to seduce you by making-out with you and pushing you towards the bed. This is where you are supposed to turn the table," explain Shiori, "And become the seducer. Take control of the kiss and end-up being the one on top by the time you end-up on the bed. That's when the scene ends. But all the time you must look like someone sexy and seductive."

"Sex on two legs," repeated Makoto utterly terrified.

"Yep," replied Shiori.

"I can't do this Shiori-san!" protested Makoto, "I don't know how to be sexy and seductive! I am the furthest thing from sex on two legs! Rin is sex on two legs! I am… I am… cuddles on two legs! I couldn't seduce anyone even if I wanted to!"

"Don't underestimate yourself and besides, you have nothing to lose from trying," replied Shiori.

Except Makoto had no clue how he was supposed to even try. But he gave-up protesting since it was clear Shiori would not be too pleased if he backed out now and he had already gotten out of bed and come all the way here. He took a deep breath and steadied himself and returned to his earlier questions.

How did he kiss? What did he want to be to the person he was kissing? Air, he suddenly decided, I want to be air. If I am kissing someone, for real or even pretend, I want to be their air. I want to help them breathe, so they can be comfortable and supported. So they can… live… but that's not seduction is it? But I want to make them feel as if they can't live without me because I am their air… For some reason he thought again of Haru. He certainly wanted to be Haru's air because the deepest more selfish wish of his heart was still to be with Haru forever.

Wait did that mean he wanted to seduce Haru… Makoto pushed the thought out of his mind as being unproductive. Not to mention wrong and perverted. Haru was his childhood friend! Well… Zaki had been too but that was not the point! And Rin was even more wrong! Wait, where did Rin come into this? Oh right, because he had been thinking of Rin as sex on two legs. Makoto signed, he really needed to stop thinking of his friends as representing different types of love, sex and seduction.

"Makeup!" called Shiori as they arrived at the hotel penthouse where the shoot was going to take place.

"Ah!" Makoto screamed in his head, he was so freaking confused! He was done! Just done! He was going to mess-up! Be the final straw! Embarrass himself in front of a Hollywood actress worth $6 million US dollars. Shiori-san was going to drop him, especially after he messed-up at the show and he'll be stuck with a Tokyo apartment he didn't need anymore and a lot of trouble and debt and, "At least I'll be able to be with Haru-chan everyday again," that made him feel better and he calmed right down.

He asked the makeup artist to look after him and just submitted himself to their care as wardrobe tried to find a dress pant and shirt to fit him. Once dressed and made-up, he was taken into bedroom of the penthouse, which also had a large living area where the make-up artist and wardrobe held court, and finally came face to face with the bored and put upon looking actress and disgruntled director.

"Well he looks like a saint," complained the actress as soon as he entered in English.

"I am sorry," Makoto managed, also in English.

"Reasonable english though," commented the actress, not really talking to Makoto as such.

Shiori rolled her eyes and filled Makoto in, "Apparently while we were fetching you, one of her entourage did a quick web search on you and found out that some of your fans refer to you as St. Tachibana. Saints aren't known for being sexually seductive."

"Ah well…" Makoto didn't know what to say, especially since he wasn't feeling particularly seductive at the moment. Still, he took a good look at the actress. Makoto didn't have the faintest clue who she was and she didn't look particularly friendly. How was he supposed to kiss her? So far he hadn't had to kiss strangers yet and now he was supposed to seduce one? Impossible, he couldn't do it! But then again, so far, he had managed a lot of things by imagining the strangers were his friends or remembering memories involving his friends. He didn't have a memory he could draw from but maybe he could think of her as one of his friends?

"Forgive me Rin!" Makoto sent his apologetic thoughts to Rin as he realised that the actress was all fire and Rin would be the easiest to imagine her as being. Come of think of it, Rin was also the only person he knew who could be as aggressive as the concept asked her to be. So Rin she would be for the duration of the shoot, "Forgive me Rin!' Makoto thought again as he imagined how outrage Rin would be if he ever found out Makoto was thinking of him when acting out a seduction. It never crossing Makoto's mind that Rin might actually like the idea of being seduced by Makoto.

"Let's get on with this," barked the director, "Places!"

Then Makoto was in the moment, just focusing on the moment, the stroke but also keeping an eye on the flags hung overhead that told him where the pool ended and thus when he had to turn or when he was near the finish. The actresses… no Rin's lips were upon him, hot and demanding. Just like fire, he was being burnt and pushed back. He could see the flags, it was time to make the turn.

If he was really kissing Rin, what would he do? "I want to be air," he reminded himself, "Rin's air for when he comes-up to breath while he races. I want to fill his lungs so he can keep on racing. Give him the air he needs to keep on burning bright and hot. But if I was kissing Rin, it would mean I was in love with him. If I loved him that means I would want to be with him and for him to be with me forever and ever. I don't like parting with things I love. So I would want him to need me, need me like he needs air. Because I am selfish like that. Selfish and greedy. I would forever want his fire with me so I could reveal in the warmth every, single day..." the actresses legs turned to jelly under her and she would have collapsed if Makoto's arms didn't come-up to hold her, carrying her to the bed and he laid her down upon it, under him.

"And cut!" called the director.

Makoto offered a friendly hand to the actress as he once again mentally begged Rin for forgiveness for using him to do something so embarrassing and perverted as seducing some actress whose name he didn't even know. Famous and worth $6 million US dollars though she supposedly was.

"If you are a saint, you are the saint of seduction," the actress commented as she got to her feet.

Makoto laughed sheepishly, "Thank you but I would be too embarrassed to be a saint of anything, let alone seduction."

The actress humped as she went over to where the director was reviewing the shoot. "It's a wrap…" director declared in total amazement once he was done reviewing, "In one fucking take… why the hell didn't we get him to start with?" he suddenly demanded of no one in particular, "Do you people not know your own talents well enough to pick the right one for the job? Disgraceful."

Makoto just looked embarrassed and wished a hole would open-up and swallow him because this was getting to be a bit much. "I'll send for the car to take you home," Shiori said to him.

"Ah, would it be possible to get a taxi instead?" asked Makoto, "The driver-san has been working hard and should probably be allowed to go home already."

Shiori snorted, "Let him take you home," she insisted, "But I'll tell him he can go home straight after. Actually that'll be the best way to ensure he doesn't get saddled with a longer drive or with more passengers, thus more stops," to this Makoto agreed.

Thinking of nothing more than to return home quickly and make sure Haru was getting the rest he needed, Makoto quickly changed and headed out. But at the corridor of the hotel he once again ran into the American actress, he really should get her name, who took the time to ask him, "What were you thinking of when you kissed me like that?"

"Ah… I imagined you were a friend…" Makoto said as a deep red blush suffused his face, "I am sorry! I can't do those things to a stranger and so had to… had to think of you as a friend who um…" Makoto lost the trail of his thoughts.

But fortunately the actress was satisfied. She laughed and said, "Whoever you are thinking of is a very lucky girl. A girl who will no doubt not remain just a friend for long."

"Not likely," thought Makoto, "Because it's Rin and Rin's a friend who is not interested in me. So even if I was interested in him, it would be one of those one-sided unrequited loves that would just hurt, a lot."

The actress moved on, Makoto headed home. His thoughts filled with Haru and the hope he would return to find Haru fast asleep. Because Haru needed his rest and sleep.

By the time he arrived home it was well passed 2 AM and he was exhausted. But thankfully Haru was asleep. Makoto quickly washed his face, brushed his teeth and then all but collapsed on his own futon. Only then did he realised Haru was no longer asleep, "They didn't get you to do anything weird did they Makoto?"

"You are supposed to be asleep Haru-chan!" protested Makoto.

"I was asleep until just now," Haru replied, "Are you dodging the question?" Haru asked, a little suspicious.

Makoto sighed, "I guess it was a little weird. I had to kiss and pretend to seduce someone."

Haru was silent for a moment before asking, "Would be able to show aunty and uncle, Ren and Ran what you did?"

"It would be a little embarrassing," admitted Makoto, "But it's just a stupid perfume ad with a more complicated concept then necessary."

"Then I am happy," said Haru as he crawled into Makoto's futon, but then added, "Makoto, you smell of women's perfume."

"I'll go have a quick shower Haru-chan," said Makoto as he dragged himself out again, "Please go back to sleep."

"I can't until you get back," whispered Haru.

"Then I'll be back quickly," said Makoto with a soft smile as he headed to the shower, cursing himself for not having a shower before he managed to upset Haru and keep him from his rest.

* * *

**Author's note:** Well this chapter got out of hand… *sigh* the orca plushie mentioned in this chapter is a shameless tie in to my one-shot The Orca Plushie


	11. Chapter 11

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Despite not sleeping the night through and going to sleep later than usual, like clockwork, Haru woke at 6:30 am. He had felt guilty about forcing Makoto to get back up and shower and so had punished himself by returning to his own futon after Makoto had returned, giving Makoto the perfectly reasonable and true excuse that Makoto needed to sleep undisturbed. He was tempted to crawl back into Makoto's but Makoto wasn't a particularly deep sleeper and Haru did not want to rob Makoto of even more of his rest. As it was, Makoto would have to be awake soon enough and head out for two more shoots.

Sighing, he got out of bed and headed to the bathroom for his early morning soaking. He could just head straight to the pool but the pool was busy in the morning as many working folks exercised before heading to work. Haru briefly wondered if that was going to be him after High School, working full time and hitting the pool before and after work. Except he had not the smallest desire to be a salaryman and he did kind of want to go to college. Maybe study art and start a business utilising his art skills. Haru was smart enough to know that he couldn't work for anyone. He was just too difficult to be an employee.

Haru had, perhaps foolishly, assumed that Makoto would join him in whatever Haru decided to do. Of course Makoto would go to the same college as him. Of course Makoto would support Haru with his business ventures, his life because he was Makoto and they were a pair who faced the world together. Haru sighed, as he slipped into the water and wondered what he did to deserve this. This situation where Makoto might be taken away from him.

The only other time Haru had, had to worry about losing Makoto was when Zaki had confessed and to Haru's utter shock, Makoto had accepted and they had started dating. But Haru had quickly discovered he had nothing to fear. Not from Zaki, who understood clearly Haru's role in Makoto's life and would not interfere with their friendship and just wanted to occupy the still vacant slot of Makoto's lover. So once Haru had been satisfied that Zaki wasn't going to take Makoto away from him, his only issue had become whether he was okay with the boy he loved being with someone else. He was still debating that question when one day he opened his locker and was reminded that his job since age 4 had been to protect Makoto. So he decided to do his job and held his tongue while Makoto and Zaki had a long, steady relationship that probably wouldn't have ended had her family not moved.

Haru was supposed to move too since his and Zaki's father worked in the same company and had been transferred at the same time but Haru was not remotely interested in annoying things like adjusting to a new school, new town and most importantly, in leaving Makoto. He was already so independent that his parents agreed he could stay back. In fact, Haru suspected his father might well have been delighted with the situation. Haru's father had never been fond of children, even as a child, finding them noisy and annoying. Haru's father was eternally grateful to the gods that Haru had turned out to be an introverted child who required very little attention with a strong independent streak. Ultimately, his father just wasn't the nurturing type.

Haru didn't care, he had his grandmother and mother but still, "It's going to be different with me though," thought Haru, "When I have kids with Makoto, we'll raise them like…" and there it was again. Haru was again assuming his and Makoto's future would be intertwined because despite everything that's happened, especially with Zaki when Haru was confronted with the uncomfortable thought that Makoto might actually want someone other than Haru as a lover, Haru still believed Makoto would be with him forever. Be his everything forever. Yet, Haru was still holding his tongue for a reason and that reason wasn't going to just disappear. But still, the hopes and dreams persisted.

Haru sighed, and submerged himself in the bath. Damn it all, why didn't Rin punch that talent scout harder? Because if Rin had, at least at this moment both he and Makoto would be in Iwatobi and Haru wouldn't be wondering if he was going to lose Makoto to the high speed world of fashion and entertainment.

* * *

Makoto woke to the smell of fried squid, his favourite, instead of mackerels as he expected. "Good morning, Haru-chan," he whispered, "Aren't you going to cook mackerels?"

"I wanted squid," Haru lied.

Makoto laughed, "Haru-chan, you aren't feeling guilty about last night right?" he asked, "You shouldn't. I should have showered at least, before getting back into bed. Probably should have had a proper bath too! I mean…" he fell silent as an embarrassed blush turned his face red as he recalled the things he did with that Hollywood actress.

"Why are you blushing?" Haru demanded, noting Makoto's reaction as he turned his head to have a quick look at Makoto when his words cut-off mid sentence, "I thought you said whatever you did you would be okay showing to aunty and uncle, Ren and Ran."

Makoto groaned, "Actually, I probably couldn't show it to my family…"

Haru turned around and glared at Makoto, "What exactly did you do Makoto?"

"It's a little hard to explain, Haru-chan," replied Makoto sheepishly, "Not to mention embarrassing…"

Haru narrowed his eyes but only said, "Drop the -chan," he turned back to his cooking but could not suppress his agitation. He so wanted to run away into the water.

Behind Haru, Makoto sighed as he picked-up on Haru's discomfort and forced himself to speak, "It was a commercial shoot for a perfume called 'Seduction'. They had a Hollywood actress who I didn't know but who was apparently worth $6 million US dollars. She ah… had to pretend to seduce me but then I had to turn the tables and seduce her instead," Makoto explained, "I… I honestly don't know how I did. I mean, the director said he was satisfied but that was last night. They were all tired and wanted the shoot to be over. I am sure in the cold light of day the director-san will realise I know nothing about seduction and either re-shoot or use one of the other people they shot yesterday," Makoto went on, "They tried a lot of people before Shiori-san gave me a try. The director is very demanding and I am not sexy or seductive. So I probably did those embarrassing things for nothing," Makoto concluded.

For a while Haru said nothing, "You are going to have to do stuff like this a lot aren't you, Makoto," Haru finally said, sad and resigned, "Kiss people, pretend to be on dates with them, pretend to love them. Make people fall in love with you…"

"It's only pretend," said Makoto.

"What if you really fall in love," wondered Haru pensively.

Makoto laughed, "I doubt it. Because I keep comparing everybody I meet to Haru-chan and no one else can compare."

"Wait, was that a confession?" Haru thought as he turned around to find Makoto giving him that soft look that Makoto often gave him but there was nothing out of the ordinary about that. No that was not a confession, that was just Makoto being his usual, sweet self. "Damn!", thought Haru as he turned back to cooking breakfast, "Makoto really needs to catch a clue."

* * *

The 12th passed largely uneventfully. Makoto did his shoots which were nothing glamorous, just some catalogues, heard more about how he was trending following the Angels and Devil fashion show. That was something but the client would have obviously preferred the show overall trended and not just Makoto.

On the 13th Makoto made a point of turning off his mobile as he accompanied Haru to his freestyle swim trials for the Japanese National Team training program. "Good luck," he told Haru, "But I know you are going to do great!"

Haru snorted, but said nothing. He would do his best because doing otherwise would be disrespectful to the water. Haru got through his heat, quarterfinals and semifinals just fine. At the finals he came third behind the current reigning high school 100m champion and runner-up. It was pretty great results considering Haru had lost to Rin and had not even advanced to regionals during the summer tournaments. He had come a long way.

"Well done, Haru!" said Makoto, "You are definitely going to be called for medicals and the interviews now!"

Haru just shrugged, "Let's go get dinner," said Haru.

"I looked-up a good curry place nearby," replied Makoto, "They have mackerel curry!" Haru's eyes shone at that and it was decided.

* * *

As they sat down to dinner Haru received the email tell him where and when to come tomorrow for his medical examination and interview. Makoto was delighted but Haru seemed more bothered than happy, "Makoto, are you going to move to Tokyo?" he asked.

Makoto was taken back, "Shiori-san wants me to. She's already had a chat with me about it."

"You grades have dropped haven't they?" asked Haru.

"A little," admitted Makoto, "But we still have the finals! We'll both have to work extra hard for final exams once we return to Iwatobi. I am sure I'll be able to make my grades back up! Especially since I won't have to be coming to Tokyo for jobs since I'll be on a break!" replied Makoto, before adding, "Well I'll have to come one weekend because of the Go Out magazine shoot but that's about it. So don't worry about me Haru! I am fine with how things are."

Silence, "Makoto," Haru called his name even as he looked away, unable to meet Makoto's eyes, "Whatever happens tomorrow, you should move to Tokyo. You can't… you can't keep commuting between Iwatobi and Tokyo without…" why did it hurt so much to say, "Without making a mess of both school and your career. But… but I'll do my best to get in to the national program so I can move to Tokyo too. Because… because I absolutely don't want to be away from Makoto," Haru concluded, his face going flame red with embarrassment.

"Haru!" cried Makoto in delight as his face lit up and he grinned that impossibly innocent and pure grin no 17 year old should be able to pull-off but Makoto somehow did, "I am so happy! Because I don't want to be away from Haru either!"

"What a romantic declaration but you aren't allowed to date," came the cold voice of Yamagami Shiori, "I hope you haven't forgotten."

Both Makoto and Haru jumped, "Ah! Shiori-san! What are you doing here?" wondered Makoto, "How did you even find us?"

"Don't turn your phone off," chastised Shiori, "I have been trying to contact you all day. As for how I found you, I searched for restaurants serving mackerels near the aquatic centre and this restaurant was among the top results. I called them, and a few other restaurants, up earlier and gave them your description and my number and asked them to call me if you turned-up. Well they called," she sat down, "I had to reward them 5,000 Yen, that's coming out of your next pay by the way."

"Shiori-san!" protested Makoto.

"That's what you get for turning your phone off," replied Shiori.

"But I wanted to spend the day with Haru undisturbed," whined Makoto, "Besides, what could be so urgent that you couldn't wait until I got home?"

Shiori started fiddling with her tablet, "That Seduction commercial shoot you did," Makoto looked scared, Haru looked curious but continued eating, "The rough cut is in," Shiori smiled devilishly, "They won't be calling you St Tachibana after this," she laid the tablet on the table and showed the boys the low quality rough cut she had been sent.

Haru dropped his chopsticks in utter shock as he watched the ad unfold, Makoto groaned and hid his face, "I can't believe I did that!"

"I can't believe you did that either," said Shiori, "I always imagined your ex-girlfriend to have been a soft sweet person. Yet she clearly was a devil in bed if you can fan and control flames like that," Makoto buried his face in his hands more, praying to every god he could think of that Shiori did not push further because hell if he was going to admit to thinking about Rin in front of Haru!

For his part Haru was looking at Makoto as if he had never seen him before. Had Makoto been looking at Haru, he would have noticed that Haru had an odd, needy look on his face. But Makoto was not looking at Haru and thankfully, neither was Shiori as she would have called him out on it without the slightest hesitation.

Instead Shiori plowed on, "The rough cut of the ads were shown to the marketing exec of the perfume company. He likes what he sees and has just greenlighted some test shots. He wants to have some mock-ups made to see what you might look like on print ads for the Seduction For Him perfumes."

"But… but I have school! Exams are coming-up!" Makoto pointed out.

"Which is why we are doing the shoots tonight," said Shiori, "Let's go."

"What now!" Makoto had barely eaten his dinner but that was a minor thought, he looked at Haru and felt absolutely terrible for once again running out on him.

"Yes now," said Shiori, "If you had picked-up your phone, we could have done it this afternoon. As it happens, Asami is doing us a huge favour by staying late to do your test shots. So let's not keep her waiting longer than we have to."

"I'll come too," said Haru, starting to get-up.

"Please pack the food to go," Shiori asked the nearest server, "You boy can eat in the car. Just don't spill anything."

* * *

The tests shots were easier on Makoto since he didn't have to be with anyone and most importantly, Haru was there to give him strength. All he had to do is look seductive for the camera and he managed that by just imagining himself, like he did during the commercial shoot, to be air and focusing his desire to be the air of… Haru.

Makoto hoped and prayed that Haru wasn't watching him carefully enough to pick-up on the fact that Makoto's mind was filled with thoughts about being Haru's air or kissing Haru underwater and sharing his breath with him. The latter was a ridiculous notion as Haru's lung capacity was volumes more than his own but it was a seductive image that allowed him to make a face that Asami actually gasped out loud at and made Shiori once again pronounce, "Yep, RIP St Tachibana."

Makoto also recalled some of his memories with Zaki to achieve some of the poses and looks Asami was demanding of him but he absolutely refused to allow himself to think of Rin. For one, he felt that he had used Rin's image enough already and for another, Makoto felt indecent thinking of Rin like that when Haru was just there. Why he felt uncomfortable imagining seducing Rin when Haru was around Makoto did not quite understand but he just felt it would be wrong. So, very, very wrong.

For his part Haru spent an absolute miserable time wondering who Makoto could be thinking of when he was making those face. Even had Haru realised Makoto was mostly thinking of him, Haru wouldn't be happy because Makoto was going to be sharing those faces with the world and Haru didn't want that. Har wanted to hoard Makoto, lock him up and keep him all to himself. Of course that was a selfish thought and served to make Haru even more unhappy. But damn! Those faces Makoto was making were just so… gorgeous!

However, as Shiori drove them home, the misery turned into determination. He would do absolutely everything in his power to get into the training program and have a good reason, a good reason other than Makoto that is, to move to Tokyo because Haru absolutely refused to lose Makoto.

So it was when Haru sat in front of Japan swim team management and was asked point blank, "How do we know you won't just get-up one morning and on a whim walk out, after we had spent months of time and money on you with the Asian games as a goal?"

He replied without hesitation, "I don't know what you heard but I am willing to do anything to prove that I want to be part of this program," because I want to be with Makoto, Haru added in his head, "I want to swim for Japan," because that's all I can do to keep-up with Makoto.

There was a pause, then some whispers and finally, "Win the summer tournament."

Haru felt his eyes go wide, "We can't offer you a place yet, I am sorry. You have the talent but we are not convinced of your commitment. But the summer tournaments have been pushed-up due to the Asian games. It'll all wrap-up before second term starts. Win and you are in."

No! One whole term and possibly the summer vacations without Makoto but, "Fine," Haru replied, "I'll win."

"Don't make it sound so easy," replied one of the managements, "At the national level, you'll be meeting the students who have been accepted into our program."

"Doesn't matter", Haru thought, "For Makoto I'll win."

Meanwhile, back in Samezuka, Rin was reading the email telling him he was accepted into the national team training program and starting from 1st term 3rd year, he'll be training and living in Tokyo.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well that became more Haru centric than I intended. Well hope folks are still enjoying this.


	12. Chapter 12

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

For one glorious month that ended in exams, Haru and Makoto were back to being normal and ordinary. Even the most die hard Mako-chan fans among their classmates were too busy stressing about exams to do more than snap some random photos of Makoto with their cell phone and even that stopped after a week as the Makoto returned to being a familiar sight.

So Haru was able to enjoy the return of the routine of walking with Makoto to and from school and studying for exams late into the night with Makoto, usually at Haru's house as Makoto's siblings (despite having their own exams) tended to turn their study time into playtime. It was almost as if Makoto had never met that talent scout. Almost.

The illusion of nothing having changed shattered one afternoon when Haru and Makoto returned to Makoto's house to find his mother in tears and his siblings indignant with jealousy, "Onii-chan! How could you!"

"How could I what?" wondered Makoto, "Mom are you okay?"

"I am fine," replied his mother, "I just realised that my little boy is all…" she sniffed, "All grown-up!" she sobbed.

"Eh?"

"We went to the shopping centre with mom after school to buy a present for Hina-chan," Ran explained, "We are going to her birthday party this weekend. That's when we saw you on the TV, kissing that girl! How could you onii-chan! I am going to marry you when I grow-up!" she whined.

"No! I am going to marry Onii-chan!" protested Ren.

This finally brought a smile to Makoto's mother face, "Unfortunately, neither of you can marry Makoto."

"Why not!" they twins demanded in unison.

"Because Makoto belongs to Haruka of course," his mother declared with a laugh.

"Mom! Don't say embarrassing things!" protested Makoto as he turned to a blushing Haru, despite this not being the first time Makoto's mother teased them about being a couple, and said, "Sorry about this," Makoto apologised.

"It's fine," Haru mumbled.

Makoto's mother laughed again at their embarrassment but continued in a more sober tone, "I guess it really hit home when we saw that ad playing on a loop at the perfume display," she explain, "You really are becoming an idol and no longer my sweet innocent little boy."

"Mom, um…" Makoto didn't know what to say, "It was only pretend…"

"It didn't look pretend!" protested Ran, "It looked just like when you were with Zaki-chan, only worse!" Ren nodded in agreement.

"It was just pretend!" Makoto insisted exasperated, "It's just a stupid ad."

Haru had, had enough, "I am going home," he declared.

"Haru-chan wait!" Makoto called after Haru, "Weren't we going to have dinner together here before going to your house to study?"

"I changed my mind," replied Haru and started to put his shoes back on.

"Haru…" Makoto whispered, at a loss for why Haru suddenly changed his mind but sensing that Haru needed some time to himself, let him go.

As soon as Haru got home, he reached for his cell phone and pulled-up Makoto's fan forum. Sure enough, the current top trending post had Makoto's new ad embedded in it. It was worse now that they had polished it, added a filter that rendered everything black and white except for Makoto's vibrant green eyes (the actress got to keep her red painted lips and red dress in colour) and the music too seemed to be better quality than Haru had heard on the rough cut. It was just… worse! Haru closed the browser and put away his phone as he started to strip. He needed a bath. He needed to calm down before Makoto came after dinner for their study session.

The next disruption in their illusion of normalcy came in the form of a phone call from Shiori, "You're going to Dubai."

"You got me a catwalk job even though I messed-up?" asked Makoto in amazement.

"Well you trended for a solid three days and then the Seduction ad hit the airwaves. So it was easy to get you some jobs. You'll be gone for about 8 days, you are doing three shows over three days and will have to leave straight after your exams finish. Do you have a passport?"

"Umm… no, I never had to leave Japan before," replied Makoto sheepishly.

"I'll send you the forms, fill them-up quickly. You'll also need a temporary work visa, I'll send you the forms for those too. Get everything back to me as soon as you can," Shiori told him.

"Wait! About… Haru…" started Makoto.

"I didn't forget," said Shiori, "Ask him if he wants to tag along with you. Your ticket will be paid for by the contract. Nanase-san's will be coming out of your pay. But twin bed hotel rooms cost about the same as single bed hotel room so that's not a problem. But I warn you, you won't have a lot of time to spend doing touristy stuff."

"Yeah I understand, I just really want to show Haru-chan the underwater hotel," replied Makoto.

"About that… you don't have any problems with the ocean do you?" asked Shiori.

"Huh," was all Makoto said but if Shiori could see his face, she would know he was going into utter panic mode.

"There is a job available, I want to put you forward for it. Especially given your swimming experience but it is risky," explained Shiori, "But if you get it, I could get you guys rooms in the underwater hotel. It's for a tourism brochures aimed at the Japanese market. What they want to do is have one person, you if you get the job, freedive down along the side of the hotel to the top most level and be on the other side of the glass from the other model," explained Shirori, "The concept being something like reconnect with your loved ones in Dubai. Technically they could fake it but they would rather do it for real if they can. So can you do it?"

There was a noticeable paused before Makoto asked, "If I do it, Haru and I get to stay in the underwater hotel?"

"Yep and I might even be able to get free tickets for Nanasa-san out of Dubai tourism," added Shiori.

"I'll do it," said Makoto, "I haven't freedived before but I have read about the technique involved. I can practice in the pool. The top most level wouldn't be too far below the surface right?"

"I honestly don't know," replied Shiori.

"I would…" Makoto was beginning to panic just thinking about it but still he pressed on, "I'll do it."

"Great! I'll let you know if you get the job," Shiori hung-up. After she did, Makoto spent a good ten minutes trying to calm himself before he returned to the roof to continue having lunch with Haru. Nagisa and Rei hadn't joined them yet so Makoto had some time alone with Haru.

Still, when he mentioned his upcoming trip to Dubai and asked Haru to come with him, he did not mention the freediving job. Afterall, he didn't have it yet, no need to worry anyone with it. But, "I am not sure I can afford tickets to Dubai," Haru replied, his tone was neutral but Makoto could tell he was upset.

"It's my treat Haru-chan," Makoto replied.

"Makoto, you can't afford tickets to Dubai for me either," Haru pointed out, "Haven't you already been advanced a bunch of money by your talent agency? Plus you have the apartment in Tokyo and stuff."

"It's fine," replied Makoto, "My Go Out magazine contract pretty much covers my Tokyo living expenses. I am a little in-debt with the agency but its not too bad. Besides…" he really didn't want to worry Haru, "I might be getting another job that'll come with free tickets for you."

"What kind of job?" Haru asked, getting a little suspicious as he picked-up on Makoto's hesitation and distress.

"A photo shoot for a Dubai tourism brochure for Japanese tourists," Makoto replied honestly.

"What do you have to do for it?" Haru pressed.

Makoto was saved from answering by the appearance of Nagisa, "Haru-chan! Mako-chan! How did your exams go?"

"I think I screwed-up english," replied Makoto grinning, "But I think maths went okay."

Unfortunately for Makoto, Haru was not about to let him off, "Makoto," he said in a dead serious voice, "What do you have to do for the tourism brochure?"

"Ah? Did you get more jobs Mako-chan? Do you have to be sexy and all kissy, kissy like in the perfume ad?" Nagisa wondered.

"Nagisa-kun!" Rei chimed in, "Stop pestering Makoto-senpai."

Makoto turned toward Nagisa and was about to address him but Haru cut him off with a simple, "Makoto, what do you have to do?" he asked again.

Makoto gave-up, "Freedive in the ocean."

All three were shocked into silence. Haru recovered first and found himself angry beyond words. He got-up and left the roof, clearly giving of the vibe that he did not want to be followed. Especially by Makoto.

"Mako-chan," Nagisa suddenly asked, "Are we your friends? Me and Rei-chan I mean, and Gou-chan too I guess. Maybe Rin-chan too…"

"Huh?" Makoto was surprised, "Where did this come from, of course you guys are my friends."

"I wonder sometimes," said Nagisa, uncharacteristically subdued and sober, "Because Mako-chan is nice and kind to everyone but only Haru-chan seem to be special to Mako-chan. So sometimes I feel that for Mako-chan there is Haru-chan and there is everyone else and we fall in with everyone else."

Makoto didn't know what to say, "Of course Haruka-senpai is special to Makoto-senpai," Rei offered, "They are childhood friends and best friends!"

"But it's not just that!" protested Nagisa, "I sometimes think that if Haru-chan wasn't there, Mako-chan wouldn't… wouldn't treat us any differently to how he treats the rest of our schoolmates. Mako-chan is kind of cold, sweet but cold."

"Like ice cream," offered Rei, "I can understand."

"That's not true at all. If anything, that's more what you guys would do," countered Makoto, "If Haru wasn't here, you would totally ignore me."

"No we wouldn't!" protested Nagisa, "I choose Iwatobi for both Haru-chan and Mako-chan. You are both special to me!"

"Me too," replied Rei, "I really admire Makoto-senpai. Just as much as I admire Haruka-senpai."

Makoto smiled, "And I think of both of you as my friends. You are not the same as the rest of our schoolmates. Gou too is special to and Rin…" Makoto sighed, "Rin's different. I can't really explain it but I will admit that Rin, Haru and Zaki, you remember Zaki-chan don't you Nagisa, are in a different place in my heart from all my other friends."

"Maybe because you are all the same age," offered Rei, who had heard a little about Zaki from Nagisa and seen her pictures in coach Sasabe's photobook.

"Maybe," acknowledged Makoto.

"But you definitely think of us as friends," insisted Nagisa, "You won't… you won't forget us when you become a star and ignore us and never acknowledge us or anything like that?"

"Of course not!" Makoto readily replied.

Nagisa immediately brightened-up and hugged Makoto, "Yay!" but then letting go he added, "But Mako-chan should probably make-up with Haru-chan before your next exam."

Rei nodded, "Getting distracted during exams does not lead to beautiful outcomes."

* * *

It was too cold to swim in the outdoor pool, but still Makoto found Haru crouched by it. "I am sorry, Haru-chan," offered Makoto as he cautiously approached Haru, "It's just, I really wanted Haru to come with me. I really wanted Haru to swim in a different sea and see the underwater hotel, maybe even get to stay at the underwater hotel. But," Makoto sighed, "I guess it was selfish of me. I mean, you'll miss the last week of school and be away for the first few days of the spring holiday and so won't have as much time with your parents. You are going to go see them during spring holidays right?" Haru usually did go to his parents who were currently living in the UK, his father being on a year long secondment to one of his companies UK partners, which is why Haru had a passport.

Haru shook his head, "Winter holiday was enough," he replied, "UK is just too far away."

"Oh," said Makoto, "So… so you can come with me? Well, you still would miss last week of school and would have to have Amakata-sensei mail you your results but I…"

"Makoto," Haru interrupted him, "If I didn't go with you, would you still freedive?"

Silence, "I don't have to take that job, even if I am offered it," replied Makoto, "But I wouldn't want Haru to pay for his own ticket as I want to take you to Dubai and I also really want to stay with Haru at the underwater hotel. That's something I totally can't do without taking the tourism brochure job. So I… I really want to do this job and I think I can do it, if… if Haru is with me."

"But if I am not with you, you don't have to do it," Haru pointed out.

"I want to do it," replied Makoto.

"Because you want to take me to Dubai and stay with me at the underwater hotel," Haru summarised what Makoto had been saying, "You are not doing this for yourself. You don't really want to do this do you?"

"Haru-chan, if I gave into my fears I would live in the middle of the desert," replied Makoto, "But I don't want to give into my fears. Especially when it keeps me from doing things with Haru. So please, come with me to Dubai and watch me freedive. Well," he added with a grin, "Assuming I get the job. Otherwise, you'll just have to watch me be a walking clothes hanger."

"I'll think about it," Haru said after a lengthy pause, that was enough to make Makoto grin wide and Haru knew his cause was lost. He was going to Dubai. He only hoped he was not going to bear witness to another awful accident involved Makoto and the sea.

* * *

**Author's Note:** From wikipedia, "Free-diving (or freediving) is a form of underwater diving that relies on a diver's ability to hold his or her breath until resurfacing rather than on the use of a breathing apparatus such as scuba gear." I am probably being too dramatic calling the dive Makoto has to do "freedrive" as the top (submerged) level of the (real but still being under construction) Dubai underwater hotel is probably not that deep. But then again…

Also, the whole Ren and Ran wanting to marry Makoto is from Drama CD 2. But I made the bit up about Makoto's mom totally shipping Haru and Makoto.

Lastly, since I keep mentioning Yazak Aki (Zaki) from high speed. So I thought I would point people here: makeupsyndrome dot tumblr dot com slash post slash 61319746760 slash where-is-aki. Basically, people think they have identified Aki from episode 10 and so imagine that girl in middle school as Makoto's first and only girlfriend for the purposes of this story.


	13. Chapter 13

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Haru had never been afraid of water. Even after he nearly drowned in elementary school he was not afraid. Even when Makoto nearly drowned, Haru did not hold it against the water because Haru had always accepted the water had fangs that could rip you apart. So why was it that his dreams were now filled with pitch black water? Water that made him afraid. But was it the water he was fearing? No, it wasn't the water he was afraid of.

In his dreams he was searching, searching for Makoto and not finding him. There was no light in Haru's dreams because Makoto was his light and his light was gone. He didn't sleep well for two days straight. He wasn't sure how he managed his exams but he knew he wasn't on top of his studies and exams as he normally was.

Of course Makoto picked-up on it, "Are you alright Haru?" he wondered.

"I am fine," Haru snapped, he had been having difficulty not snapping at Makoto since the dreams began and each time he snapped, Makoto looked like a kicked puppy.

Haru suspected that by now, very likely Makoto had figured out what was eating Haru. Knew that Haru really didn't want him to do something so dangerous as freedive along the side of an underwater hotel just so they could capture some "authentic" photos purely, it seemed to Haru, for bragging rights. Surely they could fake it in the much safer environment of an aquarium or something.

Yet Makoto still did not turn down the freedive job and quietly started freedive classes with a Iwatobi based freediver as soon as Shiori confirmed he had got the job but that the client insisted he get some proper lessons. They didn't want any accidents and being Dubai tourism, were willing to spend what it took to get Makoto fully prepared. Makoto did not ask Haru to come with him to the lessons. That hurt!

Worse, the lessons meant that they couldn't walk home together and were no longer studying together for their remaining exams. That annoyed Haru further. Combine that with his black mood during lunch, it seemed he and Makoto rarely spoke these days. Indeed their only proper conversation was about the Dubai trip and that stupid freedive job.

"Shiori-san wants final confirmations before she books your tickets Haru," Makoto whispered, "You are coming, aren't you?" he asked, uncertain but hopeful.

"If I said no would you drop that freedive job?" asked Haru quietly, as Nagisa and Rei both became taut with tension.

"It's too late for that," replied Makoto, "They already paid a significant amount of money for me and if I break contract, I would lose face. They are paying me a lot of money for the photoshoot actually," said Makoto, "Enough that if I do it, all my debt with the agency so far will be cleared-up and I can start fresh after Dubai," the Dubai government agencies were a generous lot.

"I did start this so I could have extra money to do fun things with everybody and help the people I love get things they want or need," Makoto made a point of turning to also look at Nagisa and Rei, mindful of Nagisa's words from before, "But I haven't been able to do much of that because making money as a working model is kind of hard," he admitted sheepishly.

"You are too hard on yourself Mako-chan!" protested Nagisa, "You took us all to the amusement park!"

"And you let me have the subscriptions you were offered for the magazines you appeared in!" Rei chimed-in, "I learnt a lot from the Monthly Muscle Magazine! By the way Makoto-senpai, those pictures of your back muscles were absolutely beautiful."

"Thanks," replied Makoto, blushing. But then he turned to Haru and waited, waited for Haru to say something.

Haru didn't answer. Makoto's face fell, "I understand," he whispered but didn't say anything more. Makoto couldn't bring himself to take another bite. Indeed, he felt like throwing-up what he had eaten. So he excused himself and went for a walk.

He was honestly at his limit. Every lesson tested his nerves and the only reason he was able to face the terrifying extremes of freediving was by thinking of Haru, wondering what kind of face Haru would make when he could lie in bed while surrounded by the sea or how he would look swimming in Persian Gulf. But now, now what did he have to hold on to? How was he even supposed to face today's lessons, let alone do the shoot proper?

Makoto found a secluded corner on the school ground and let all his feelings wash over him. With no one around to see him, he didn't have to hide anything behind his smile. So he leaned against a tree and let the despair he was feeling drown him. He meant what he said, he couldn't back out anymore without losing face, going even further into debt with his agency and more importantly, incurring the wrath of Shiori - who could well ensure his career was over before it started. At which point how on earth was he going to pay back his debts?

There was a rumour he heard around the office about a model called Shinji, who had once been Shiori's client. Shinji was supposed to be a promising up and coming star much like Makoto himself but then he had somehow managed to get on the wrong side of Shiori. Shiori destroyed him. He ended-up committing suicide but that only caused more problems for his loved one. Not only did his parents have to grieve for him but they also got stuck with his debts to the agency and went into bankruptcy because of it. Makoto absolutely did not want that to happen!

Makoto also did not want to spend the rest of his life paying back his debts either. He heard a lot of stories about that too. Failed models who went into other careers but then spent years trying to pay back their debt or not very successful models who kept modelling but never went anywhere. Makoto had nicely managed to get himself trapped and this was despite have a decent amount of work for someone who just started. But then, he was commuting between Iwatobi and Tokyo, which got expensive. Of course he now also had a Tokyo apartment that was incurring him costs.

If he could just do this freediving job, somehow do it even without Haru there to lend him support, he'll at least be debt free! Well at least for a little while because despite Haru's encouragement and Shiori's persistence, he did not want to move to Tokyo permanently yet. Of course that meant that he would go back into debt from having to pay for regular shinkansen tickets and would be limited in the jobs he could take and… Makoto laughed self mockingly. He was well and truly screwed because he couldn't quit while he still had the Go Out magazine contract without losing face either.

Honestly, he didn't want to quit. Because he felt like he could do something with himself if he stuck to this path. Make himself someone Haru would want to remain by his side forever and not just out of routine and habit because they were childhood friends who lived close to each other. Because deep down, Makoto dreaded being cast away by Haru. It was almost inevitable wasn't it? Surely one day Haru would wake-up and realised he had outgrown Makoto and slowly start to drift away from him, until Makoto gently but inevitable got the message he was no longer wanted. He also thought he could make his parents proud, take care of his siblings and just be able to be there for the people he loved.

Makoto took a deep breath and slowly released it, now was not the time to indulge in his insecurities. He had a job to do, a commitment to keep. He needed to find a way to dive into the ocean that terrified him without Haru's hand to keep him steady and his presence to calm him. But how? "Haru," he whispered, despairing once again, somehow hoping that by invoking Haru's name he would magically gain the strength he lacked.

He did not expect a reply, "Makoto," Haru called back.

Makoto froze and quickly tried to arrange his face into a smile as he turned to face Haru, "Did you finish your lunch, Haru?" he asked, trying to make small talk, "Sorry for leaving like that. I wasn't feeling very well. I think I ate too much this morning. Ren and Ran are beginning to cook and made a big breakfast for the family as practice. It would have been rude not to try everything but I have been bloated ever since," Makoto laughed self deprecatingly.

Haru wanted to punch him. He was so angry that he wanted to hit his best friend, the man he loved more than anything in the world. Haru clenched his fists tightly to crush the obscene desire, digging his nails into his palm, drawing blood. "Makoto," Haru's voice choking, "I don't want to be pulling your unconscious body from the ocean ever again. So..." I am begging you not to do this, Haru wanted to say but the words got lodged in his throat because… because he was afraid even if he begged, Makoto would still do this thing and Haru would know for certain how far Makoto had drifted away from him.

"I'll go with you," Haru said instead, "But you have to promise to think about yourself. Not do anything too dangerous. Because…" I don't ever want to experience the dread of being left with nothing but your corpse, but Haru couldn't get the words out.

"Haru…" whispered Makoto but then he broke out in a relieved smile, "Thank you, Haru!"

* * *

Soon enough their exams were over and Haru and Makoto found themselves on a plane bound for Dubai. About the same time, Rin was packing-up to leave the dorm room he shared with Nitori for the last time. He was going to stay a little while with his mother and Gou, then he would move into a dorm in Tokyo and start his training with the national team.

Nitori watched him pack-up a little sadly but didn't say anything. When Rin was done, he turned to Nitori and asked, "How does the plot of your BL mangas usually go, Nitori?" he wondered.

"Huh? Oh, ah…" Nitori was once again embarrassed as he recalled he had accidentally confessed to Rin and had been gently but without a doubt rejected by him, "I… well um… they have lots of different plots. So, so I can't just describe one as a BL manga plot. But… but the kind I like involve senpais who are perfect and who inspire their kohai to work hard and… and reach for the stars. I…" Nitori blushed a little embarrassed, "I like it best when the kohai can make it. Because… because the stars they reach for are their senpai!" he admits, his blush deepening.

Rin sighs, "I lied to you a little that day," Rin admits, "I mean, I meant what I said about Makoto being the only person I could think of who could make me feel warm and fuzzy inside if we were dating. But the thing is, you made me feel warm and fuzzy inside too with your friendship, your concern and support no matter how much of a jerk I was being. You ah… saw me at my worst and still remained by my side. That meant a lot to me. Thank you, Ai."

"Rin… senpai…" Nitori was at a loss for words.

Rin debated his next move for a moment but decided there was no harm. This was goodbye. They might never see each other again. So… Rin leaned in and kissed Nitori lightly on the lips. Nitori was shocked but happy. When Rin pulls away, Nitori was left speechless, "You should do as your name, Ai," because Ai means love, "And find someone to love, who can love you back wholeheartedly. You deserve it."

"So… so do you, Rin-senpai!" Nitori finally found his voice, "And if you think Tachibana-san is the only who'll make you happy then you should go after him! And I'll cheer you on in rl and virtually!"

"Virtually?" wondered Rin.

"On Tachibana-san's fan forums! Someone posted information about you as well as about Nanase-san and your relationship with Tachibana-san. So the fujoshi fans of Tachibana-san have started 'shipping' you and Nanase-san with Tachibana-san. I am of course on team MakoRin, which is what they call your ship! Because you and Tachibana-san would make a wonderful couple!"

Rin did not know how to respond to that. Finally he said, "Thanks… I guess…" Nitori beamed. This was farewell, but a good farewell.

* * *

**Author's notes:** I am going straight to fandom hell aren't I? But at some point I would really like to write a forum exchange between Nitori (team MakoRin) and Nagsia (team MakoHaru of course). I imagine Gou would be on team MakoRinHaru because you can't go wrong with more muscles. While Rei would change ships regularly based on the quality of fanart and fanfiction, i.e. he's on board whichever ship as the more beautiful fan stuff.


	14. Chapter 14

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Somewhat randomly, Haru remembered his grandmother and what she had once said about Makoto back when they were children. Haru was six or eight and they had been invited to a wedding. Haru couldn't remember whose wedding but he did remember asking his grandmother about weddings and marriages. The discussion had ended with Haru declaring, "So I'll marry Makoto and then we'll be together forever!"

His grandmother had chuckled, "It doesn't work like that. Besides, it is not something you can decide on your own. Makoto has to also want to be with you forever."

"Of course he wants to be with me forever, he said so," Haru had declared.

Haru gave a sidelong glance and took in Makoto's pensive profile. He had grown-up firmly believing in Makoto's childhood declaration that he would be with Haru forever. Even the weight of his grandmothers words, tempered as they were with time and experience could not shake his belief. Yet now… Haru turned his full attention back to the alien looking structure that sat in the sea: the Underwater hotel.

They had been in Dubai for about five days but for the moment were staying at a different hotel since Makoto was busy with his catwalk shows. After they were done, Makoto and Haru would relocate to the Underwater Hotel for the last two days of their trip, during which time Makoto was to take part in the photo shoot for the Dubai tourism brochure.

Makoto had been too busy to do much of anything. He was lucky if he could make it back in time to join Haru at the beach near their current hotel for a quick dip. So this was the first day he had managed to get enough time to come with Haru to see the Underwater Hotel, albeit only from the outside. Haru himself however had made a point to come see it as soon as he could.

It really looked alien, something out of a sci-fi movie. It consisted of two disks, one fixed on top of the waterline, the other disk designed to move up and down along a elevator tube from the bottom of the sea to just above the waterline. When Shiori had first mentioned the freedive job to Makoto, she had said Makoto had to freedive down along the side of the hotel to the top most level and so far, that was all the information Makoto had. But there wasn't really a "top level", so Haru's best guess was that they were going to raise the submerged disk up near the waterline. At least that's what he hoped.

But, "I think they are going to make me dive down the 20 meters to the bottom," Makoto said finally, "I mean, if the disk is not at the bottom, they wouldn't be able to get the corals reef in the picture."

"But Yamagami-san said top level," Haru said, trying to convince himself as well as Makoto that Makoto really didn't have to dive down that far.

"I think Shiori-san misunderstood," replied Makoto, "I mean, doesn't make much sense to raise the disk higher and take pictures. All you'll get is blue water. They could have done that in a tank."

"20 meters…" whispered Haru.

"It's not so bad," said Makoto, "I managed 15 meters without fins during training and that's with a pause of about 2 minutes at the bottom. With fins I can go down to 25 meters now. I'll be fine, Haru," he assured his companion with a grin.

Haru wasn't convinced, "They are pairing you up with Hinamori again aren't they," Haru had, had a grudge against Hinamori Chizuru ever since the amusement park commercial shoot.

The so called professional model had taken like 15 takes to get a simple sequence right. Her dumbness had meant Haru could not spend as much time with Makoto as he wanted to and that was unforgivable. Besides which, Haru was dreading that Hinamori would mess-up this photo shoot as well and cause Makoto to dive more times and thus increase the risk of accidents and not to mention increase the chances of Makoto having a panic attack.

Picking-up on what Haru was thinking Makoto chimed in, "Don't worry Haru-chan, Hinamori-chan is much better at photo shoots then she is with cms. She has more experience with them and she does better when she doesn't have to speak."

"She's an idiot," Haru said bluntly.

"Haru that's mean!" protested Makoto, "I have done photo shoots with her before, she can totally get and hold poses really well!"

Haru shrugged, "Let's swim," he said and headed for a nearest publicly accessible beach.

* * *

Shiori did not accompany Makoto so he had to navigate his schedule, coordinate with the local show management, deal with his fellow models as well as actually do the modelling. Most days he finished very late, very exhausted, hungry as hell, very stressed and just wanting to sleep but needing still to make the trip back to his hotel and eat before he could crash. He was also supposed to be working out and that meant he would be up very early to go for a run, a form of exercise he did not care for, or go swimming with Haru.

He asked one of the other Japanese models how he was coped with the stress and exhaustion and was simply told, "Chemical energy," and promptly offered pills. Makoto was mildly disturbed and politely refused. He would have to find his own way of balancing things.

"Why didn't Yamagami-san come?" wondered Haru, annoyed as he watched Makoto all but collapse on the bed. Haru had already ordered dinner but was beginning to doubt Makot would be able to eat anything before at least having a quick nap.

"I am not the only model on her books," Makoto pointed out, "She can't always accompany me, especially overseas," he yawned, "Most models don't have personal managers who are with them on every job. I am lucky that Shiori-san makes the effort to accompany me on big jobs but asking her to come overseas with me is too much," Makoto yawned again.

"I'll draw you a bath," said Haru getting up, "It'll help you relax and then we can eat."

"I got offered drugs today," Makoto suddenly said, stopping Haru dead in his tracks, "Chemical energy, senpai said."

"Makoto…"

"I turned him down but I realised I need to figure something else out," replied Makoto, "Especially if weeks like this become routine."

"Don't take drugs, Makoto," said Haru, "You don't need them, you have the water," Makoto laughed, earning a glare from Haru.

"Don't worry Haru-chan," he whispered sleepily, "I mean, I want to be able to continue to look Ran and Ren in the face if I start taking drugs."

Again someone else, why couldn't Makoto just do something or not do something because it was bad for him. For his own sake? But it probably didn't matter as long as Makoto didn't resort to drugs. Yet, Haru once again wished Rin had punched that talent scout harder.

Back in Japan, Rin too was wishing he had punched Tanaka Lory harder as Gou excitedly told him that Makoto and Haru were in Dubai and all she knew about Makoto's jobs, "Makoto is freediving in the sea?"

"Yep, he's been taking lessons and everything," she replied cheerfully, "I am looking forward to seeing the pictures. He's muscles should be in great display!"

Rin said nothing. He wanted to call Makoto up and yell at him, demand to know what he was doing, wasn't he afraid of the ocean? The water? But then he remembered that Makoto seemed more and more comfortable swimming since the regionals. So maybe he had conquered his fears or at least dealt with them enough to take on something daft like freediving for a bloody photo shoot. But then again…

Finally Rin settled on sending Makoto a text message, "Heard you were doing something stupid and dangerous for the sake of fashion. Do me a favour and stay safe. Saw your perfume commercial. Damn Makoto, when did you learn to kiss like that! I am never going to be able to look at you the same way."

Makoto blushed when he got the message. How could he not when Rin mentioned the perfume commercial and Makoto was reminded he had been thinking of Rin when he was kissing that actress like that. His reply to Rin, however, contained no hint of his embarrassment or his secret. It simply read, "Thanks Rin but don't worry, I'll be fine. Haru is with me." Makoto could not know that the mention of his dependency on Haru was beginning to bother Rin.

* * *

The last day of Makoto's catwalk show was chaotic and Makoto was grateful that Haru had come with him because he was not sure how he was going to manage alone. They had to checkout in the morning and Makoto left his luggage in Haru's care as he rushed off. Haru took both their stuff to the Underwater Hotel, finally seeing the inside of it and for the first time since they came to Dubai, he thought that the trouble Makoto had gone through to bring them here was worth it! It really was like living underwater.

Haru was suddenly overcome with the desire to draw. So as soon as he could, he went looking for art supplies and started to draw as soon as he returned to their room. At first he drew the room they were in, drew the coral reef he could see outside their window. But then he started designed a house, no a home. A home he wanted to share with Makoto.

He thought about building a home off the coast of Iwatobi similar to how the hotel was built but then remembered that the coastline of Iwatobi were subject to typhoons and scrapped that idea. He then started to draw a house by the river that was half submerged but it didn't feel right. Finally he decided to be practical as well as fantastic, not to mention romantic and drew the bedroom he wanted to share with Makoto.

He imagined a room with wall to wall aquarium, filled with goldfish of all colours and sizes. They would have a king size waterbed and special furniture that didn't interfere with the lines of the aquarium. I.e. all their furniture would be lower than bottom edge of the aquariums so they didn't obstruct the view of the fishes.

Haru designed lamps and light fixtures as a dolphin and orca swimming together like yin and yang, chasing each other in an endless circle. The carpets would be a dark coloured, as would the walls so that the blue of the water could be brought out and chests, they would have chests to store their stuff in as opposed to closets and cabinets.

Bedroom concept down on paper, Haru got to work on a living room, which too would have wall to wall aquarium. The the kitchen would be plain, simple and functional and was followed by a guest room because Haru figured Makoto would want Ran and Ren and his parents to visit them often. The guest room wouldn't have wall of wall aquarium. It would be simple and clean, decorated only with their orca and dolphin lamps. Finally, Haru gave into his wildest dream and designed a kids room with painted walls depicting the sea.

Haru looked back through his drawings and knew this was a very far off dream. If indeed they could ever achieve it. It wasn't just that such a place would be expensive to build but the aquariums would cost a lot of maintain. Haru sighed, they would probably have to be more practical and cut down on the number and sizes of the aquariums if they did indeed ever get around to try and build the place. But for now, he was happy to dream.

* * *

Makoto was a wreck by the time he was done. He confused enough to start heading towards their old hotel before remembering they had moved hotels. Damn he was tired.

"Are you sure you don't want some?" the model who had previously offered him pills asked, "I mean, you have more work tomorrow right? The pills can help you relax tonight and be at your peak tomorrow."

Makoto was tempted and then horribly disappointed at himself, "No thanks," he finally said with a smile, "I don't want to depend on such things."

"Suit yourself," the model replied, "Ah, don't mention to anyone I have these though. I don't really want to lose my head over these."

Come of think of it, Dubai did have very strict drug laws. It was probably very dangerous to have or take drugs while in the UAE. Suddenly feeling doubly happy he hadn't done something truly stupid Makoto headed towards the right hotel. He briefly wondered how the model in question had managed to get his hands on the pills within UAE but then decided he didn't want to know. He had zero interest in the dark side of modelling. This brush was enough.

Makoto was too exhausted to appreciate the beauty of the underwater hotel. But he pulled on what reserves of energy he could when he got to the room he was sharing with Haru to give him a smile and listen as Haru gushed about the room, the hotel, saying, "It's like we are actually inside Animal Crossing: Deep Sea!"

Makoto smiled more at the mention of his siblings favourite game. A game Haru often played with them late into the night. Haru used to play with them… Makoto hadn't had the time to play games for months now. "I am sorry, Haru," Makoto suddenly said, "I haven't been spending enough time with you or Ren and Ran."

"Don't worry about stuff like that," whispered Haru, finally noticing how drawn and exhausted Makoto looked, "You should have a nap. I'll order some room service and draw a bath for you."

"Sorry Haru," replied Makoto, "I have been…"

"Don't," Haru interrupted, "Thank you for bringing me here," Haru whispered, "This place is amazing. But," Haru got-up from his bed and pushed Makoto down on his, "You need to rest. I will never forgive you if you have an accident tomorrow because you are too tired." Makoto managed a faint smile before giving into his desire for sleep.

* * *

They rigged-up a floating platform from which Makoto was supposed to freedive. They were going to use guide ropes, using which Makoto would pull himself down and pull himself up. Once down he had to float to the glass of the room inside which the model Hinamori would be waiting. All they had to do was put their hand against each other on either side of the glass and for them to look like they were in love. Makoto had very transparent goggles, with transparent straps and nosepiece to make it look as if he didn't have goggles on at all. But they were still limited in how much focus they could put on Makoto's face. Hinamori would have to do the heavy emoting and Haru for one, didn't think she was capable of it at all.

Makoto dived once as a sort of practice and immediately knew he wouldn't manage too many dives. So he really hoped they got the shots they needed soon. He was exhausted. He had a small, waterproof earpiece through which the photographer was giving him instructions.

"Okay, Makoto," the photographer wasn't Japanese and so had skipped straight to calling Makoto by his first name, "We are ready, Hinamori is in position," Hinamori preferred being called by her last name, "Just dive down and place your hands against hers and look like you are gazing at the love of your life."

Makoto turned to his side and gave Haru, who insisted on joining him at the floating platform, a long lingering gaze before taking in a deep, deep breath as he had been trained to do and dived down. Makoto kept Haru's face in his mind as he dived. He found Hinamori and did as he was instructed. He was still thinking of Haru when he smiled faintly as he settled his gaze on Hinamori through the glass. Afterall, Haru was kind of the love his life, wasn't he? Maybe they weren't romantic, but they were soulmates, weren't they?

"Good face," came the photographers voice through the earpiece, Makoto had no idea if he meant Makoto himself or Hinamori but a good face was um… good.

Makoto's lungs began to ache. He tapped on the glass to indicate he had reached his limited as agreed and headed-up.

"Again," came the instruction, "I want a few more shots from a different angle."

Taking just a moment to recover, Makoto dived again, his third dive including the practice one, "Again," insisted the photographer, "Need more shots."

Makoto compiled, and made his fourth dive. He made it halfway before aborting and heading-up, "Sorry," he said to his handlers at the platform, before stealing a glance at Haru, "I think I need a break before I can dive again."

The handlers nodded and sent a message to the photographer. "Did you remember your promise, Makoto?" asked Haru.

"Yeah," admitted Makoto as Haru helped him on to the platform, "I probably could have forced myself but I remembered you made me promise to think of myself. Thinking of myself, it was probably best I had a break before diving again," Haru rewarded him with a smile.

Makoto had to do four additional dives before the photographer was satisfied. He was exhausted but insisted that he and Haru ate at the hotel's restaurant, which was located on the disc that sat on top of the waterline. They got to watch the sunset. But Makoto was yawning by the time dessert came around.

"Go to bed after," Haru instructed.

"What about Haru?" wondered Makoto.

"I am going to visit the Meena Bazaar and look for souvenirs," he replied.

"Eh! I wanted to go there too!" protested Makoto.

"We can go together tomorrow," said Haru, tomorrow would be their last full day in Dubai but most importantly, Makoto was not working tomorrow and it was his last chance to see something of Dubai before heading back, "So I'll do the annoying stuff today and find something to take back for Nagisa, Rei and Gou. Plus my gifts for Ren and Ran. Tomorrow you can look for something to take back for Ren and Ran."

"Nothing for Rin?" wondered Makoto.

"We won't see him to give him anything," Haru pointed out.

"I'll still get something," said Makoto with a grin, "It would be mean otherwise." Haru shrugged.

They parted and Makoto returned to their room and was asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow. He slept for about an two hours before waking somewhat refreshed. He splashed some water on his face and made himself some tea. For the first time since they moved to the underwater hotel, Makoto got a chance to simple sit and admire their surrounding.

It truly was an amazing place. He was glad he got to bring Haru here. He went to put away the tea stuff when he noticed Haru's drawings. He didn't think Haru would mind him looking at them, so he started to go through them. Marvelling at both Haru's skill and the subject matter.

"Is this the house you want to live in, Haru-chan?" he wondered. He noticed the two bedrooms and immediately realised that the room with the aquarium was the room Haru wanted to sleep in.

However, he mistook the room Haru had intended to be the guest room to be his room. Because it simply did not occur to Makoto and Haru wanted to share a room, a bed with him. Makoto assumed that they would be sharing the house as housemates. Which is why the child's bedroom went completely over his head and he dismissed it as Haru trying out different ideas.

Makoto put down the drawings and returned to his bed. But he lay awake thinking. He wanted to build that house for Haru. No, for them both because that was one way he could always be with Haru. Yet to build the house he would need a lot of money. The house would also be difficult and expensive to maintain because of the aquariums. He could build that house if he made it big. If he got somewhere in the world of fashion and entertainment. Shiori had spoken to him about branching out into music.

However, she had made it clear he couldn't branch out into music without moving to Tokyo. Commuting between Iwatobi and Tokyo was barely okay with just modelling. No way he could do it while modelling and trying to break into music. Makoto also didn't want to drop out of school. He had good grades, he didn't see why he shouldn't finish high school.

Shiori had told him about a high school in Tokyo which had flexible classes to accommodate working students. Including those in the entertainment industry. She assured him she could arrange a smooth transfer to that school for Makoto. Makoto would be able to be serious about this career he unexpectedly found himself in while finishing high school.

Makoto sighed, as he turned to look towards the desk where Haru's drawing were. He wanted to build Haru's dream house for Haru. Because he wanted to see Haru smile. To see Haru happy and since he wanted that, there was only one logical thing for him to do.

As if on cue Haru returned, "I am back," Haru said softly as he entered the room.

"Welcome back, Haru-chan," Makoto replied as he turned to Haru with a smile, "I have decided," he added, moving to sit-up on the bed, "I am going to move to Tokyo for good."

Even though Haru had been half expected it, even though Haru himself had encouraged him, it still came as a shock, a blow to the gut. Makoto was leaving, he was actually going to be leaving and Haru, Haru could say nothing.

* * *

**Author's Notes:** The game "Animal Crossing: Deep Sea" mentioned is from FrFr short 1 that was included with the first DVD volume. It's apparently what Makoto and Haru play with Ran and Ren. As I said before, the underwater hotel is real but not yet built. If you want to see concept pictures and stuff, go here: underwaterhoteldubai dot org


	15. Chapter 15

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Makoto packed-up and left Iwatobi with no immediate plans for return within two days of returning from Dubai. He had to since the spring holiday's were just two weeks long and his dubai stay had ended-up being ten days long instead of the previously planned eight. Everything had been so rushed with tears, lots of tears from Ran and Ren and some from his mother too. Plus Haru had been silently upset and angry, Makoto was not sure why since Haru had encouraged him to go but Makoto had been too busy to think on and figure out Haru's odd mood. In the end Haru had bid him a silent goodbye if only because Ran and Ren had given him the noisy, teary farewell Haru never could.

In all the rush, Makoto didn't get a chance to tell Nagisa, Rei or Gou until he was onboard the train bound for Tokyo. His friends were beyond shocked and he was flooded with mixed messages wishing him luck but at the same time surprised and Nagisa's outright accusing, "Are you abandoning Haru-chan! I am never forgiving you for this Mako-chan! I mean, its not like anyone else can make Haru-chan happy. I can cook mackerels for him for a lifetime and Haru-chan still wouldn't love me like he does you! How could you do this to him! You meanie!"

Makoto was shaken and confused, what on earth was Nagisa on about? "I am not abandoning Haru. I would never abandon Haru! I am doing this so we can be together forever."

"How?" demanded Nagisa, "I don't get it! I never got it!" Nagisa finally admitted, "How is you becoming a distant star we only see in magazines, billboards and on TV going to help you and Haru-chan stay together forever?"

"Money," replied Makoto pragmatically, "I am going to build Haru his dream house."

"A beach shack with a double bed doesn't take a lot of money," Nagisa had replied.

"That's not Haru's dream house ^.^" Makoto had texted back, "Besides, if the beach shack only has one bed, I can't share it with Haru. It'll have to be at least a two bedroom beach shack, so we can live together. Besides, beachfront land costs a lot."

"You are so dense Mako-chan!" Nagisa replied, "But never mind. That's part of your charm. Good luck in Tokyo and remember, you promised not to forget us!"

"I won't," Makoto replied.

He closed his eyes and took a moment to centre himself, then reached into his duffle bag and pulled-out the drawing Haru had made in Dubai. He had asked Haru to keep them, Haru had been surprised and had wondered why. Makoto wasn't ready to tell Haru he had made this house his long term goal and that everything he did from now on, he would do so he could build that house for Haru and for himself too. So instead Makoto had told Haru a half-truth and said he wanted them because they were pretty and he wanted to post them up in his dreary Tokyo apartment to cheer the place up a bit. Haru probably knew Makoto wasn't being honest but he let it go and for that Makoto had been grateful.

Makoto put away the drawing. After a moments thought he decided to text Rin, "Hey, it looks like I'll be making my home in Tokyo start, well today. Text me when you have some time and we can do something. I have a souvenir to give you from Dubai. I hope you'll like it," not expecting an immediate reply, Makoto put his phone away and decided to take a nap.

* * *

"We need a new captain!" Nagisa declared when the swim club finally got together.

"Rei," Haru replied without missing a beat before heading towards the pool.

"But I have the least experience and Haruka-senpai is the vice-captain…" Rei started to say.

"Haru-chan's personality doesn't suit being captain," replied Nagisa, "It has to be Rei-chan!"

"What about you Nagisa-kun?" wondered Rei.

"I am not captain material either! Best was Mako-chan but since he's abandoned us, it has to be Captain Rainbow Rei!" Nagisa said enthusiastically.

"Rainbow Rei…" repeated Rei.

"Well that's your superhero secret identity!" replied Nagisa as the conversation derailed, as conversations with Nagisa tended to do.

Meanwhile Haru trained, trained with a focus and determination he didn't posses even when he was preparing to race Rin in the prefecture tournament or race in the relay during the regional tournament. But then again, if Haru lost this time, he would lose Makoto and that he was not prepared to do.

* * *

Makoto thought he would be very busy once he moved to Tokyo and have lots of jobs. He was dead wrong because Shiori decided Makoto would not longer be up for low profile catalogue jobs or even certain magazines. From now on, Makoto would only do mid to high-end fashion magazines, billboards and TV commercials for goods that were going to help his image. But Shiori was still accepting even small catwalk shows since Makoto needed more experience with those.

Unfortunately, what it all meant was that Makoto had less work in the short run and a very tight budget as a result if he didn't want to go back to being massively in debt with the agency. However, Shiori instructed him to concentrate on school, keep in shape and most importantly work on some songs and booked out a studio so Makoto could record a proper demo, which did put him back in debt with the agency but that couldn't be helped.

Makoto was thankful to have some time to adjust, especially now that he was actually living by himself and not treating his time in Tokyo as something of a stopover, but the whole money situation was beginning to worry him. He got a break on that front when the fashion house who made that "Seduction for Him" perfume Makoto had modelled for decided to use him on a limited run print ad for the seduction perfume but on a more extended print, billboard and TV commercial for a range of youth oriented body sprays and colognes. Between that and the Go Out magazine contract, Makoto was at least not going to starve. But he was still a long way off building Haru his dream house filled with water.

"Wait a bit Haru," he whispered into the air of his silent and lonely apartment, "I'll get there."

* * *

They managed to recruit a few first years. Two of them swam breast and freestyle, the other back and butterfly. Rei and Nagisa were ecstatics. Haru was happy for them and the club, going so far as to give the two freestyler some pointers and tips but he made clear that he would not be swimming the relay with them. He was going to concentrate on the 50m, 100m and 200m sprints with the goal of becoming national champion.

Both Nagisa and Rei were upset that Haru wouldn't be swimming with them in the medley relay but they were also surprised that Haru was being so serious about competitive swimming. It was no surprised then that when Rei found himself alone with Haru after the rest of the swim club had finished training and left, he said, "You have started to care about your time, Haruka-senpai."

Haru didn't reply, so Rei pushed on, "You don't seem to be swimming free."

"I am not free," Haru replied.

"But why not? Is it because Rin-san left for Tokyo?" Rei guessed, "Do you want to get into the National Team so you can swim with him again?" asked Rei.

"Don't be silly Rei-chan!" Nagisa interrupted, popping out of nowhere. He had got out of his swim gear and was holding his backpack. Why he decided to come back into the pool area was anyones guess, "It's cause Mako-chan left!"

Haru choose not to answer either of them and headed towards the starting block, he wanted to do one more lap. But Nagisa blocked his way and flat-out asked, "What I don't understand Haru-chan is why you don't just tell Mako-chan you are in love with him. I mean, he's kind of wishy-washy but if you confessed…" Nagisa winked.

"Nagisa-kun!" chastised a flustered Rei.

"You used to be bullied in school right, Nagisa," Haru said, seemingly randomly.

Nagisa blinked, "Yes."

"Are you still bullied?"

"No, not really, why are you bringing this up, Haru-chan?" Nagisa wondered.

"Makoto is younger than me by a few months," Haru pointed-out, although Nagisa and Rei already knew that, "So when we first became friends, he was physically less developed than me," because when you are 4 years old, almost six months of extra growth makes a big difference, "So from the start, I protected him. From bullies who tried to take his orca plushie, from mean dogs, aggressive cats, held his hands during creepy situation we didn't understand, anything and everything," Haru managed a faint smile, "Though he is big and strong now and doesn't need me to protect him from things he can fight with his muscles, he still clings to my shirt when things get scary in a way he can't fight with his muscles. I am still his protector."

Nagisa wanted to say something but swallowed it back, sensing there was more coming. "When we were in Middle-school, I kissed Makoto. It was the first kiss for both of us. I was…" Haru looked away, "Someone saw us. I don't know who it was but someone saw us. One day, shortly after, I came to school and found my shoe locker filled with bits of paper with homophobic slurs, what looked like used condoms and other crap."

"Haru-chan…"

"Haruka-senpai…"

"I didn't care, at least not about myself," he assured them, "But then I thought they might have done the same to Makoto's locker. Thankfully he was late that day, having to take his siblings somewhere before school, and I could check his locker before he got to school. Sure enough, it too was filled with crap. I cleaned-up before Makoto got to school, I don't think he ever found out."

"Around the same time Zaki confessed to Makoto and they started dating. So after awhile things returned to normal but it taught me a valuable lesson. I can't be with Makoto, Nagisa," said Haru, "Without opening him up to irrational hate and anger. So I chose to protect him."

"That's… that's not right Haru-chan!" protested Nagisa, "You can't mean that! Are you really okay if Mako-chan finds some random girl and marries her and has annoying ugly kids with her!"

Haru didn't reply. "Haruka-senpai," started Rei, "It's not that I don't understand your reasons but Makoto-senpai, I think Makoto-senpai deserves to know how you feel."

Haru sighed, "I have my limit," admitted Haru, "Until I reach it, I want to give Makoto the chance to find another Zaki or even hook back-up with Zaki. I have to give Makoto the chance to be normal."

"Haru-chan…" he was sad at first but then Nagisa smiled and hugged Haru, "You really are great! Mako-chan is so lucky!"

"Indeed," agreed Rei, "But, but I think Haruka-senpai and Makoto-senpai would be beautiful together. So I hope all girls stay away from Makoto-senpai!" Having used-up his word reserve, Haru just smiled at them both.

* * *

It was happening again and Rin didn't know why. He trained every day but he wasn't making any progress. The head coach was trying to teach him new form for his butterfly but Rin couldn't seem to grasp it and because he was working on his form, his time was dropping. Then there was the teasing in the locker room.

"Hey Matsuoka, make sure you don't line-up with the Australians," said one of his senpais, "Well, that is assuming you make it to a tournament."

Rin bit his lips and held his tongue. He didn't regret swimming with his friends in the regionals. He had needed it and would be forever grateful to Rei for giving him the chance and for Mikoshiba for shielding him from more dire consequences for his action. But… it appeared he would have to put-up with the snide remarks because of his actions for the foreseeable future.

Rin sighed and pulled out his phone and read again Makoto's message. He never did get back to Makoto with a time to meet. Perhaps that's what he needed. A little bit of distraction from his arduous training routine and the monotony of his school work.

"If you are free, let's meet this saturday," Rin texted to Makoto, "There is a movie I want to see. It's in english but your english is good and besides, its not really a movie you have to follow the dialogue in."

"Sure thing," Makoto replied back in a few minutes, "Looking forward to it!"

They met-up on Saturday and first thing Makoto did was present Rin with his souvenir from Dubai. It was a wallet made of shark skin, "Arabian carpetshark," explained Makoto, "Don't worry, they aren't an endangered species or anything. I checked!"

"Thanks," replied Rin, putting it away, then grinned, "Appropriate theme given the movie we are going to watch."

"Which is?"

"Sharknado! They are showing it at a small cinema nearby that specialises in foreign films," Rin looked-up to see Makoto with a look of terror on his face, "Don't worry, it's not scary so much as goofy. At least that's what I heard."

"Ah, great!" Makoto replied, reassured.

Unfortunately, as ridiculous as Sharknado was, it still had more blood and gore then Makoto was comfortable with. He ended-up cling to Rin and hiding his face in Rin's arm, a lot. Rin decided he was going to make a point of watching more "scary for Makoto at least" movies with Makoto. Still, he did feel bad about scaring Makoto like that. So after the movie Rin suggested they go to a Cat Cafe. Makoto readily agreed.

There was something unbearably cute about watching Makoto play with a cat. Rin sipped his bubble tea and watch Makoto pet cats and found himself more relaxed and happy then he had been in weeks. "Let's do this again," Rin suggested, "Sometime soon too!"

"Eh? Even though I disturbed you during the movie?" wondered Makoto.

"Are you kidding, watching you be terrified was half the fun!" Rin replied honestly.

Makoto pouted, "That's mean."

"Oh make that face again," Rin asked as he pulled out his mobile, "I want to take a picture." Makoto just laughed and returned his attention to the cat, Rin took a picture anyway. "This is going straight to Mako-chan fan forums."

"Eh?"

"Just kidding," Rin assured him but then he smirked, "Or am I…" Makoto pouted, Rin took another picture, "There we go! A cute picture of Makoto pouting! My day is now complete!"

Makoto laughed again. They left shortly after. The next day in training Rin suddenly got the techniques his coach was trying to teach him. He managed it so well that he even started working on his speed by the end of the session. It was the first good day he had, had in training for weeks now. Rin decided he really did need to start seeing Makoto on a regular basis, purely for swimming reasons of course.

* * *

**Author's note:** I wasn't going to reveal Haru's reasons for holding back until much, much later but then I realised that since this isn't a mystery novel, there isn't really any good reason to hold back on Haru's motivation. Especially since not revealing it will just make people wonder why Haru doesn't just kiss Makoto senseless when Makoto is being uber oblivious.


	16. Chapter 16

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Makoto-Senpai, I hope you are doing well. Haruka-senpai mentioned you were overworked and feeling out of energy in Dubai. I imagine it's getting worse now that you are in Tokyo, especially since I know your mother used to cook all your meals and make your bento. So I have taken the liberty to research and compile a list of nutritionally balanced recipes that should also provide you with prolonged energy. I hope you will find these useful.

-Rei

Thanks Rei! They came in really handy because I am not much of a cook and have been eating convenience store food more than I should. These recipes are easy to cook and tasty, so they have been great. I had a little difficulty with baking the fruit and nut bars but Rin helped me with those. He actually changed the recipe a bit and put in honey, lots of honey. I was afraid it would ruin the nutrition balance you carefully researched but Rin assures me that his "Rin Matsuoka patent pending fruit and nut energy bars" were just perfect and I should just shut-up and eat them. They do taste better with honey and I carry a bunch with me to snack between jobs. Really helps as I often don't get time to eat properly while working. Thanks again.

-Makoto

Rei: Haruka-senpau, um… Rin-san and Makoto-senpai seems to have grown close.

Haru: Yes, Makoto and Rin hang-out almost every weekend.

Rei: And you are not worried?

Haru: Why should I be worried?

Rei: Ah, never mind. I am overthinking things. I am cheering for you senpai!

Haru: Thanks…

* * *

Mako-chan! Why did you leave! Now Rei-chan's captain and it's a nightmare! He's making the first years memorise theory! He even made a Iwatobi SC handbook full of theories on swimming and teamwork AND, get this, philosophy of beauty and the beautiful swimming stroke! He's weirding out the first years and it's all your fault!.

-Nagisa

Ah, sorry about that Nagias. But a handbook is probably not a bad idea. I mean, a team having a guiding philosophy could help with the teamwork. I think our philosophy was always friendship above all but we had a history that meant we could express that philosophy easily. So maybe Rei's handbook might help the first years know where we are coming from. They can then change things to suit themselves so the Iwatobi SC isn't something they inherit but create, together as a team.

Oi, Nagisa, it's Rin. I hijacked Makoto's laptop to just add that, that was fucking deep! You should listen to your wise jedi former captain!

message sent

Sorry about that Nagisa! Rin hit send so I couldn't delete anything he added. You don't have to listen to me. I am not there, so I can't judge the situation properly. Just give Rei a chance. Okay?

-Makoto

Nagisa: Haru-chan! I think Mako-chan is dating Rin-chan! You should totally do something about that.

Haru: They are not dating. They just hang-out on the weekends.

Nagisa: But Haru-chan!

Haru: Nagisa, don't worry about it. Makoto doesn't have feelings for Rin and I doubt Rin feels anything for Makoto. It's inconceivable.

Nagisa: If you say so.

* * *

Gou: Onii-chan! What are you doing this weekend? I hope its something fun!

Rin: Makoto and I are going to the Vampire Cafe.

Gou: Didn't you and Makoto-senpai go out last weekend?

Rin: Yeah, we went to a fish place. Makoto got sad over the mackerel selection. Annoyed the hell out of me!

Gou: Ah! He was missing Haruka-senpai!

Rin: sends eye roll emoticon

Gou: That's mean!

Rin: Anyway, long story short. I am never taking Makoto to a fish place again.

Gou: You sound like a jealous boyfriend.

Rin: I am not jealous of Haru!

Gou: Wait… you didn't deny the boyfriend part! Are you two dating?!

Rin: Don't be an idiot! I don't have the time and Makoto management wants him to remain single and available for the foreseeable future. We are just friends who like hanging out with each other.

Gou: How much more time do you need? You seem to be going out on dates every weekend?

Rin: Gou we do not go on dates! There is no obligation or expectation between us. Makoto can cancel last minute and sometimes he does because he has to work. I have a steadier schedule but the option is there. We don't have to do anything special and can just turn-up wearing whatever, smelling like whatever. It's a totally different feel to properly dating.

Gou: I don't get it.

Rin: Small example, if Makoto and I were actually dating, I would get jealous and pissed when he starts ignoring me in the middle of dinner because Haru randomly decided to call!

Rin: I mean, Haru didn't even talk, just made Makoto have an almost one-sided conversation describing his day! It was so freaking annoying! Especially since Makoto got all sad and guilty afterwards, figuring Haru was lonely. Cha! My mood is turning foul just remembering it.

Gou: You are so totally dating Makoto-senpai…

Rin: No I am not! Geez!

Gou: Still, that's pretty rude even between friends. Can't imagine Makoto-senpai wasn't all guilty for ignoring you for Haruka-senpai.

Rin: He made up for it the week after by renting Judge Dredd, in English too! The gore was a bit much for Makoto and he ended-up hiding behind my back, a lot. Good times.

Gou: And how would that have been different if you guys were dating?

Rin: You're my little sister! I am totally not going to discuss with you what I would have gotten Makoto to do to me or let me do to him, straight after he was done talking to Haru to make-up for totally ignoring me.

Gou: O.O I am going to totally put that as a fanfic prompt on the MakoRin section of Makoto-senpai's fan form!

Rin: Gou seriously! Do not feed the fujoshi!

Gou: But it's so much fun! Especially the fanart! So much muscles!

Rin Matsuoka is now offline

* * *

Makoto: Hey Rin. I am so sorry! But I can't go to the Vampire Cafe with you this saturday. Shiori-san invited me to her house for dinner. He husband is apparently a big time music exec and he's going to be home for the weekend (he travels a lot). She wants me to meet him. I guess she decided she couldn't push me on my own talents and has resorted to nepotism. ^.^

Rin: You are totally over thinking it. In the world of showbiz and fashion, or even sports sponsorship, talent isn't enough. It's all about who you know. Just be thankful Yamagami is married to a music exec.

Makoto: Thanks Rin. Hey, why don't you go to my apartment anyway. You have the spare key right? Just let yourself in if I am not there and well make yourself at home and stay the night. We'll go somewhere for breakfast.

Rin: And go watch a movie! A vampire movie and then we can go have lunch at the vampire cafe!

Makoto: Are you trying to kill me?

Rin: What? Kill my sweet Mako-chan? Never! I just enjoy watching your terrified face!

Makoto: You are so mean!

Rin: But you love me anyway!

Makoto: Why did I ever agree to swim in the relay for you?

Rin: Because I was a cute and adorable 12 year old and you couldn't say no to my cute and adorable face.

Makoto: You're incorrigible.

Rin: That I am!

Makoto: ^.^ See you tonight.

Rin: I'll probably be asleep by the time you get home.

Makoto: I'll still see you ^.^ Talk to you tomorrow but see you tonight.

Rin: Whatever!

Rin read back the chat log, "Fuck!" he said to himself, "That totally read like a conversation between boyfriends!" He sighed as he he made a point of deleting the chat history, "I am so fucked!" because he had fallen for Makoto and fallen rather hard.

Absently Rin wondered if Makoto ever read the chat history between himself and Rin back and noted how like a couple they sounded. But then remembered he was talking about Makoto who grew-up with Haruka and never really had a close male friend apart from Haruka and Rin himself. To Makoto, this sort of conversation was probably normal. Makoto wouldn't be able to pick-up on the fact that Rin was head over heels in love with him. Rin honestly did not know if he was happy or unhappy with Makoto's obliviousness.

* * *

**Author's note:** Sorry for the cheating chapter but I hope it was still enjoyable. I wanted to explain that I used Rin Matsuoka as opposed to Matsuoka Rin because I figured that in informal situations such as naming snack bars and logging into chat programs, Rin probably does use the anglicized version of his name because of his time spent overseas. So it's something unique to Rin and I won't be using it with other characters or even with Rin when he's being talked about by Japanese characters or introducing himself to Japanese characters.


	17. Chapter 17

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Shiori had work with one of the other "talents" on her list and so Makoto was told to make his own way to her apartment by 7:30 PM for working dinner with Shiori and her husband Yoshino. He was a bit nervous and wished he could have asked Rin to come with him. But dragging his friends to places for his own selfish needs was something he was trying to avoid doing. Afterall, he didn't want his friends to start hating him for being a needy, clingy sort of person. He didn't exactly a have a lot of friends to begin with and it was hard for him to make friends. Oh he was friendly and attracted people but he was hesitant to call a person his friend. It was not a title he bestowed easily and that was probably a defect on his part.

Probably his bar was too high, his criteria for what constituted a friend warped by his years with Haru. Come to think of it, before Nagisa and Rin, Haru and to a lesser extent Zaki were the only people who Makoto would have referred to as his friend. Everybody else were classmates or clubmates and he loved them all but… Makoto wasn't sure where he was going with this. He just knew that there was a line he had that most people in his life never crossed into becoming his friend. Even now, his friends constituted of Nagisa, Rei, Gou, Rin and yes, Zaki.

Even though he had not had any contact with her except for New Years cards she was still a friend. Because he knew, just knew that she was someone he could call in the middle of the night, messed-up and broken and she wouldn't turn him away. That's what his grandfather had told him about what a friend was, the person who doesn't turn you away or turn from you when you are at your lowest. That's why Haru was so special, he was the one person Makoto could always rely on but Makoto was fairly confident that the people he called his friends now, would also come to his aid in the middle of the night. But hopefully he would never have to find out.

As he was thinking these things, he arrived at apartment complex the penthouse of which Shiori shared with her husband. It was one of those super expensive places with a security guard and everything. Said security guard was currently arguing with a disheveled looking man who was as out of place the sleek, pristine and expensive environment as a stray piece of trash.

"Please! She knows me! Just let me speak to her," he begged in a broken sounding voice.

"No, absolutely not! I was left strict instructions not to disturb the Yamagami-san except for the guest she's expecting, you are not the guest she's expecting," the man replied with finality.

"How do you know I am not who she's expecting?" the man challenged.

"Because my daughter is a Mako-chan fan and so I know what he looks like and he's standing behind you," replied the middle-aged security guard, "Please go ahead Mako-chan, you are expected. I have called the elevator to the penthouse for you."

"Than… thank you," replied Makoto, not entirely comfortable with the idea of a Middle-aged man randomly called him Mako-chan to his face. Why his fans insisted on calling him Mako-chan was beyond him but Shiori assured him that as nicknames went that was a good one.

Makoto started to turn away when the disheveled man suddenly grabbed him and Makoto found himself looking at the man's face as opposed to the back of his dirty hair covered head. Makoto recoiled in horror at the sight of the hideously cut-up face!

The man had clearly once been quite good looking, there were traces of that in the unmarked jaw and right upper side of his face. But his entire right side, his nose and a good chunk of his left side was cover in scars. It's as if someone had taken a razor to the man's face. Makoto was appalled.

"You," the man started, "You are one of Shiori-san's talents, right? Can you help me? I have to see her! I just have to!"

"Let go of him!" the security guard barked, "I am going to call the police if you don't get your dirty hands off him and leave this place at once."

But the man was undeterred, "Please! I don't need long, just 10 minutes will do!"

"Ah…" Makoto managed as he tried to dislodge the man's hand, that was gripping his sleeves for dear life, "I will let Shiori-san know you were here, umm…"

"Shinji," the man identified him.

"Wait Shinji? As in the guy who killed himself and left his parents in debt?" blurted out Makoto before realising how absurd the statement was given Shinji was most certainly NOT dead. Although with a face like that, Makoto wouldn't be surprised if Shinji was a ghost… a thought that promptly served to terrify Makoto and he found himself exerting real strength to pull away from Shinji and backed away.

"Feh, Shinji is like a cockroach. He doesn't die," came Shiori's voice. She was running late and was just coming into the building, "What to know the real story Makoto?" she wondered but before Makoto could reply she continued, "This idiot boy right here is walking example of why you shouldn't do drugs. All he had going for him was his looks and a small smidgen of talent in music and composition but he goes and gets himself addicted to all sort of junk, slices-up his own face during a bad trip of the gods only know what and of course, renders himself useful to the company as a model and a performer," she glared at Shinji, "I go out of my way to find him work as a songwriter because I took pity on him and the crippling debt the agency was going to saddle him with and what does he do? He hooks the lead singer of the band he was writing for on party drugs on which he overdosed and died!"

"He was already taking stuff," Shinji protested, "I just sold him a few pills from time to time. Including," he admitted reluctantly "The stuff he oded on but that wasn't my fault! He took too much."

"That doesn't make it any better!" Shiori pointed out annoyed, "Anyway, his parents, who were not rich, sold everything they had to clear him of debt and then committed suicide together because they were retired and literally just had enough money left for funeral expenses."

Makoto was horrified. He didn't know which version of the story was worse but he was at least glad that Shiori wasn't responsible for ruining Shinji's career. He liked Shiori and so it was nice to know that she was in fact a very nice person who had gone out of her way to try and help Shinji with getting him a job as a songwriter.

"I know I screwed-up!" said Shinji, "And lost everything but I am trying to turn things around and I have just the song to help me do it! It's gold! Total gold and it'll be a #1 hit!"

"Forget it!" said Shiori, "You have plenty of chances and I am not giving you another one. No matter how good your song is, you are unmarketable as a singer and your voice isn't what it used to be anyway. I am NOT trusting you around another of my young charges."

"But its good! Just listen," Shinji begged, Shiori huffed and turned away, motioning Makoto to follow but Shinji dropped to his knees and begged, "Please!"

"Should I throw him out?" asked the security guard pitilessly, having overheard the story, he had no sympathises for Shinji.

"Yes!" said Shiori.

"Ah," Makoto looked at Shinji, who looked so, so broken and pitiable. He couldn't help but speak-up for him, "Shiori-san, maybe he can um… sing a bar or two? You can throw him out after but um…" he didn't know what else to say.

Shiori stopped and huffed a bit, and turned towards Makoto as the guard moved to drag Shinji away. Panicking Shinji decided to just start singing, "Days of ever free confusions/ come through my heart/ until the moment I look away from them," it appeared to be a sad song, at least that's how it sounded given the melody Shinji was singing it in as he resisted again the guard who was doing his best to drag Shinji away, "A maelstrom not like the usual/ Tormented in inferiority just the way I want it/ The momentary shots of fake scenes/ Will they be watered down?" he continued, "That blinded past/ What was it for me? / They took it away / Without letting me even say goodbye."

Shiori rolled her eyes, "Pathetic and unusable! You have lost your final talent, Shinji! Give it up already."

Shinji did give-up, his body going slack and suddenly the guard finding it easy to drag him towards the door. Makoto felt his heart wench at the sight, "The… the lyrics seems good," he offered sheepishly, "But maybe the melody needs to be different. Perhaps um… a bit more rock? Like," and Makoto proceeded to sing the lyrics, most of which he picked-up even after only hearing it once, in his strong voice to a rock beat.

Shinji gaped, the guard had stopped dragging him away because he had stopped to listen to Makoto and Shiori, Shiori looked angry and annoyed. Because she knew a "side A" song when she heard one and as sung by Makoto, that was a side A song! This had been a problem because the songs Makoto himself had written, were kind of side B songs or second or third release singles from an album. They were NOT strong debut singles. This however… Shiori turned towards Shinji and said, her voice harsh and her face dark, "Shinji, if you give Makoto drugs, even once..." the didn't voice the threat out loud, but it was there, in her looks and in the air.

"I am clean now! I swear!" said Shinji.

"On what Shinji?" wondered Shiori, "You don't have anything you can swear on. No honour, no family and if you ever had a god they surely abandoned you. So save your breath," she turned away, "Come on Makoto, we have dinner waiting. Fuwa-san," Shiori addressed the security guard, "Please let Shinji wait here for a bit. I might have to call him-up later this evening."

Makoto felt a little bad about going to dinner while Shinji stood in a corner and waited but it was Shiori's house and she was allowed to invite or not invite whoever she liked. On the elevator ride up, Makoto offered, "I am not going to take drugs, Shiori-san."

Shiori sighed, "I am sure you think that now but a debut single is just step one. A music contract usually includes a full album and yours certainly will. So you might end-up working with Shinji for weeks, months, putting together songs for the album. During that time you might be stressed or tired or whatever. Shinji's solution to everything is to pop pills and I don't care how clean he claims to be. He's incapable of being clean. Are you sure you'll be able to resist temptation every single time?" she asked.

"Um…" Makoto wasn't sure, "Well um…"

"Once you take it once," said Shiori, "What stops you from taking it a second time? When again you are a stressed or tired or whatever? Third time? Fourth time? Plus if you can't tell by his face, Shinji doesn't exactly quality control his stuff. So far as you can quality control junk like that. A tainted batch is all you need to end-up like Shinji." she sighed, "I am kind of hoping you are too much of an angel to be a corrupted by a deeply flawed and troubled human like Shinji," said Shiori, "Don't prove me wrong Makoto. I really don't want to be visiting hospitals for your sake or worse, attending your funeral."

* * *

Makoto and Shiori's husband, Yoshino, talked about random things during dinner. About school, about Makoto's interests, about his water loving friend Haru and how Makoto wanted to build a house with wall to wall aquariums for himself and Haru to share for the rest of their lives and about Rin and his quest to become an Olympian and be world champion. "Swimming is a big thing for you," noted Yoshino.

"I love it," admitted Makoto, "Not the competitive side of it but more swimming with my friends."

"I signed him up to train with a professional swim club near where he lives," explained Shiori, "I figured it would be best for his modelling brand to keep his swimmers physic and not transition to a generic muscular body like every other muscle bound model. Easier to differentiate."

Yoshino nodded, "Maybe that can be a theme for the debut single too."

"Maybe," said Shiori, she took a deep breath and broke the news of Shinji's potential involvment to Yoshino.

"Living dangerously aren't we," commented Yoshino dryly, "Or maybe just tempting fate. Tachibana-kun is what, 17?" Makoto nodded, "17 year old with the invincibility complex that 17 year old usually have, living away from his family and friends, having to balance school, his career, the fame, fandom and then working closely with an agent of corruption such as Shinji…" he gave Shiori a look.

Shiori sighed, "I know, I know," they both looked at Makoto.

"I'll be fine!" Makoto reassured quickly, "I mean, my friends and family are all supporting me, even though only Rin is here with me. Plus I also want to continue to look my siblings in the eye, so I won't do anything that will set a bad example to them. Plus, plus I am glad to be able to give Shinji-san a chance to turn his life around again. I am sure he won't do anything to ruin his chances."

Yoshino snorted, "I don't know whether to call you innocent or naive. Doesn't matter, if Shinji's face doesn't deter you from taking from him whatever he might end-up offering you, nothing will save you."

After dinner Yoshino had Makoto sing the songs he had written and agreed with Shiori that they were good but not debut singles. He then had Makoto sing the few verses of Shinji's song and proceeded to grudgingly call Shinji up. Shinji at this point had been waiting for two hours but he didn't complain and proceeded to give Makoto the full lyrics.

"This is kind of depressing," Makoto commented.

"It's about me losing everything," said Shinji.

"Well Tachibana-kun hasn't lost anything," Yoshino pointed out, "In fact his life is just starting. So, Tachibana-kun, what would you change to make the song more about you?"

Makoto read the lyrics once, twice and randomly thought about Rin and all the rage he had bottled-up inside of him rooted in his feelings of inadequacy and frustration, because he couldn't be what he wanted to be. The depressing lyrics of the song, especially about looking at the past when Rin had felt like he could do everything and anything he wanted sort of fit with the depressing lyrics already written.

Then Makoto thought of Haru and how Haru was always a shining light that light that had attracted them all. Haru's light had helped Rin find his way, had been a guiding beacon all of Makoto's life, attracted Rei and was what Nagisa chased so he could bask in it. It wasn't about him per say but that is what Makoto wanted to sing about, he wanted to sing about his friends about seeing sights they had never seen before.

"Rage on until the moment / when you'll sharply look away from the dazzling light / The sun is blazing on my flavor / I'm lost with nowhere else to be / What I want, what was it I was after? / To find delight in this silence / Flying toward the future I'm searching for / Chasing after the birds / The hand I outstretched connected / To a scenery I've never seen before," offered Makoto, "That can go after the first few verses. But maybe we can add another verse after the first too," suggested, "So that the hopefulness doesn't come as a surprise, at least that's what I think."

Yoshino turned to Shiori, "Sure we want to risk Tachibana-kun with Shinji?"

"I am not going to do anything to him!" Shinji protested.

"Make sure you don't," warned Shiori. The night ended with Yoshino agreeing to give a recording contract to Makoto. Shinji would write some songs for Makoto, they would work on the songs together and of course, Makoto himself was to write a bunch of songs himself and they would record what he had already written and decide on what goes in and what doesn't at the appropriate time.

"For an album," Yoshino explained, "You usually record double the number of songs that are actually included and then you pick and choose to create a them. For you, let's go with youth, friendship and coming from a coastal town and loving to swim. Not all the songs have to be happy. In fact I would prefer a variety. Coastal towns do have their share of tragedies," Makoto nodded, so Yoshino stopped and gave him an opening.

Taking the hint Makoto explained, "When I was young there was a big Typhoon that claimed the lives of many fishermen. An old man I befriended died, my friend Rin's father died and I… I sort of became afraid of the water, of the Ocean because I could not comprehend how they could die just 3 km off the coast. For a long time, I swam in a fashion where I was trying to run away from the water. But I have," Makoto smiled, "I have since gotten better."

"Maybe a song about that might be interesting," commented Yoshino, "But its late, so enough discussion about that. Shiori will no doubt fill you in as the contracts become fixed and Shinji," now Yoshino was giving Shinji a warning glance, "Is not a novice at recording albums. Just don't take everything he says in face value."

"I am not going to do anything to him," Shinji protested again, again his protests fell on deaf ears.

* * *

Makoto barely made the last train and stumbled into his six tatami apartment pretty late. Two futons had already been laid and he could see Rin's sleeping for in one. Rin was using the futon Makoto had bought for Haru, when he came to stay with Makoto, but Rin had personalised it with his own pillow. Makoto smiled and carefully went to kitchen to get himself some ice tea from the fridge.

As he half expected, the fridge, which had been empty that morning, was filled with groceries. Usually if Rin was coming over to have dinner at Makoto's apartment and stay the night, he and Makoto met at the train station and they went together to the supermarket near the station to do Makoto's weekly grocery shopping and buy extra food for dinner. Rin had started to eat the herculean quantities of food needed by a professional athlete and so they had to buy extra otherwise Makoto would have to go shopping mid week. Without fail they fought over the payment at the cashier. Makoto insisted on paying for everything while Rin complaining that it was because of him that Makoto had to buy extra food so he should at least get to pay for that. Makoto usually won that argument, pointing out that Rin would be the one cooking.

Which is what usually happened the weekends they stayed in. Makoto was a pretty basic cook. Through out the week he ate brown or white rice, steamed vegetable with chicken or pork lightly fried or curried using store bought curry powder. Makoto also batch baked the dried fruit and nut bars he snacked on, on sunday night and those were about the most complex things he made.

Rin on the other hand was a fan of a show called "Master Chef" while living in Australia and took home economics while in Australia just to have access to a proper kitchen so he could try and cook the dishes he saw on the show. He also cooked when he came to visit him mother and Gou but Samezuka hadn't had a kitchen where Rin could cook and neither did the Tokyo dorm he now lived in. So instead, Rin indulged in his love of cooking in Makoto's kitchen. Cooking-up elaborate dishes whenever they stayed-in for dinner.

Makoto thought Rin cooking all those delicious dishes for him to enjoy more than made-up for Makoto always being the one to pay for groceries and usually being the one to pay for dinner when they went out but every now and again, like today, Rin stocked Makoto's fridge when he knew Makoto wouldn't have time to go shopping on saturday afternoon as he normally did. The simple gesture make Makoto very happy although Makoto was not sure why. He supposed it was nice to know Rin was thinking about him.

Makoto stood in the kitchen drinking his tea, when from the main area drifts in Rin's sleepy voice, "How did it go?" he wondered.

"Sorry, for waking you," Makoto replied, "I think it went well. I have a music contract now."

"Congratulations," Rin mumbled sleepily, sitting-up, "I knew you would get it. Damn you and your talented voice!"

"You never heard me sing!" Makoto pointed out, coming to sit near Rin.

"I don't have to," replied Rin, "If you weren't talented, Yamagami wouldn't be trying to push you into becoming a music star," he rubbed his eyes sleepily.

The only source of light in the room was a night light near the entrance but it was enough to show that Rin was still wearing his street clothes and Makoto's nose told him Rin hadn't bathed yet. "Were you trying to stay awake and wait for me?"

Rin blushed and hoped the room was too dark for Makoto to notice, "You had a big meeting. I wanted to hear all about it. But ah…" Rin turned away.

"Go have your bath, Rin," said Makoto, a little amused, "You must have been training all day and then hauled my grocery all by yourself. You must be exhausted. I am glad you body knows what's good for it, even if you don't."

Rin glared, "How do you know I didn't bathe before I came?"

"I know what you smell like when you have bathed before coming," Makoto replied with a smile, "Old Spice, that's your brand isn't it?" Rin blushed more and hoped that night light would go out because he really didn't want Makoto to notice how red his face was, "I always wondered about that. Old Spice is a bit umm… old fashioned for people our age isn't it?" Makoto finished a little sheepishly.

There was a pause before Rin said simply, "It was my father's brand," Makoto blinked and immediately felt awful for bringing it up but Rin continued, "I mean, at least I think it was his brand. Not that I remember what he smelt like. Well I remember he smelt like fish when he came home but I don't remember him always smelling like fish. After he died, I found bottles of old spice in what used to be my parents room in my grandmother's house. The room was locked-up after my father died and my mom moved us to Sano prefecture because of her job. So I assumed the bottles belonged to my dad. I liked the scent, so when I grew old enough to buy stuff for myself, I started wearing it. Kind of lame if you think about it."

"Of course not!" Makoto quickly said, "You are trying to be close to your father in the only ways you can and that's… romantic," even as he said that Makoto knew he had the title for the song he was supposed to write about the summer Typhoon tragedy in Iwatobi - Old Spice.

"Can you really use the word romantic like that?" wondered Rin, his tone teasing.

Makoto laughed, "I don't know, it's late!"

"Go have your bath first, I had…" Makoto's phone vibrated, since he started receiving calls Shiori and other people at his agency and not just calls from his family and Haru, he had started to keep his phone on vibrate all the time. But in the small room, the phones vibrations could be clearly heard by Rin and not just felt by Makoto.

"It's Haru," said Makoto, his face lighting-up like it tended to do when Haru was involved.

Rin stifled a sigh, "I'll have my bath first I guess," he said as he headed to the bathroom. Rin doubted Makoto heard him because Makoto's full attention was arrested by Haru the moment his name popped-up on Makoto's cellphone.

* * *

**Author's Note:** I… have no idea why I just gave Rin cooking as a hobby. Also, yes this part is different from how Makoto is usually portrayed in fanfiction because people seem to assume Makoto makes Haru bentos and stuff like that but both in the Drama CD and FrFr short its made clear the Makoto doesn't actually do much, if any, cooking. His mother cooks all his meals and Haru usually makes his own bento, unless he is sleeping over at Makoto's house in which case Makoto's mother makes him a bento. Makoto did offer Haru squid he got from a neighbour in episode 1 because Haru didn't have a bento but that's about it. I am pretty sure when it comes to food, its actually Haru who probably ends up making Makoto bento and cooking his meals if Makoto's mother isn't around. Makoto is just not nearly as domesticated as people think he is.

Just in case you guys didn't figure it out, the lyrics are from Rage On but i did leave lines and stuff out as at this point the song is not what we know and love. That will happen later as Shinji and Makoto work on it together.


	18. Chapter 18

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Makoto: When is the prefectural tournament? It's been moved-up hasn't it.

Haru: You can't come.

Makoto: But I want to see Haru swim!

Haru: You can't come.

Makoto: But why not?

Makoto: Haru?

Makoto: Why not?

Makoto: Haru!

Haru: I miss you.

Makoto: Haru…

Haru: I don't want to see you just for a few hours.

Makoto: I would be there for a few days.

Haru: Or a few days.

Makoto: I think I understand. But I am thinking of coming down to see my family for a week or so during summer. I hope you won't avoid me then.

Haru: I'll avoid you.

Makoto: Eh!

Haru: This is not a joke Makoto. It really hurts not having you with me.

Makoto: I am sorry Haru. But it'll be worth it in the end! Well, I hope so anyway. I am working hard on my debut single. Its a good song and I always think of you and Rin when I work on it.

Haru: Me and Rin?

Makoto: Yep. The chorus is "Rage on until the moment when you'll sharply look away from the dazzling light". You're the light Haru and Rin was raging not because of you but because he couldn't be the light or so I felt. That's why I think of you guys when I sing.

Haru: Makoto you scare me sometimes.

Makoto: Scare you?

Haru: My dreams have always been very... domestic, I guess is the word. Unlike Rin who dreams of the world. I kind of feel as if you are becoming like Rin, dreaming so big that I… can't keep-up.

Makoto: Don't worry Haru. I am not dreaming of the world. I am just dreaming of a house filled with fish and water that I can share with Haru forever.

Haru: Makoto, don't say things like that when I can't see you face. I might get the wrong idea.

Makoto: Huh? Um… okay. Sorry, Haru-chan.

Haru: Drop the chan.

Makoto: ^.^

Haru put away his phone and curled-up into a tight little ball. It was all getting a bit too much. The absence of Makoto, the random statements from Makoto that sounded like confessions but were not, each news of Makoto's progressing career that filled him with fear when he should be being a good friend and wishing Makoto well in the very least, and Rin was not helping matter.

Haru did not for a minute believe Rin was falling for Makoto. How could he? Rin didn't see Makoto. Makoto was just one of "the guys" to Rin. Isn't that how Rin always lumps Makoto, Nagisa and Rei together when they run into each other? Even at the crab festival it was "Hey, Haru," followed by, "The rest of you guys are here, too." No, to Rin Makoto was just a background character not worth his notice. Sure they were hanging out now but it was probably because Rin was bored and being Rin, had no issues using Makoto alleviate his boredom. Rin would probably lose all interest in Makoto once Haru got to Tokyo. However, that didn't mean Haru wasn't jealous of the time Rin got to spend with Makoto. Time Makoto would be spending with Haru if they were back to living in the same city.

Haru sighed, and rolled over. At least he was not helplessly waiting. He had things he could do that would return him to his rightful place by Makoto's side. First up, next weeks prefecture tournament. Haru would win all his events. Place in the top 8 for 50m, 100m and 200m. Then he would with the regionals and the nationals. So he could move to Tokyo and be with Makoto. That's all he wanted right now. To be back besides Makoto.

* * *

"Yamagami, I need bodies! Who do you have free?" one of Shiori's colleagues demanded over the phone, sounding somewhat panicked.

"Male/female? What age? Any physical characteristics?" asked Shiori calmly.

"Young males and buff, that's why I am calling you!" her colleague responded irritably. Shiori resisted the urge to point out that two of her five clients were female of the waif physical variety. Her colleague continued, "It's that damn 'Warrior: Hundred Blades' production, the director just mass fired a bunch of the bit part actors and extras in a fit of rage. It's a disaster! We now need to quickly find about ten samurai retainers. Who do you have who could pass for a samurai?"

"Tachibana and Toko, would hit the part and are free," Shiori thought, "But Tachibana is currently auditioning for a commercial job, it should be a formality and I don't know when they are going to schedule that shoot," it was for a new deviation of the "Seduction for Him" perfume that Makoto had already advertised.

It was called "Aqua Seduction" and creative director for the perfume got really excited when he found out about Makoto's freediving work for Dubai Tourism and his experience with swimming in general. They came-up with a concept with Makoto in mind. Makoto would have to screw-up badly not get the job. Afterall, there weren't too many other models who could potentially put-on a mer-tail and swim in a shark tank.

"Shouldn't clash," replied her colleague, "It's only a week job. Less if the director keeps changing his mind and demanding script changes. Feh, at this rate the movie might get the plug pulled on it. Anyway, I am forwarding you the details and forwarding their name to the assistant director. Make sure both Tachibana and Toko bring their A-game when they get called-up. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to rangle-up a few more bodies."

* * *

"I'll be in your care then," said Makoto with a bow as he finished meeting with the "Aqua Seduction" advertising creative team. He was all smiles on the surface but his stomach had more butterflies than Rei's pajamas. Why did they always put him in water? Stupid question, they were marketing him as the "swimmer model" and so obviously he was going to get all the jobs involving water, the kind of jobs professional swimmers with sponsors wouldn't normally take. Although a professional swimmer wouldn't usually advertise a perfume unless it was a perfume they were credited as helping create. Something like Michael Phelps's Aqua Seduction and Michael Phelps was probably the only swimmer big enough to justify such a thing. Makoto wasn't sure there were any swimmer in Japan big enough to have that kind of draw.

"Maybe one day Rin will be that big," thought Makoto, "I wonder what kind of scent he would lend his name to… he likes Old Spice, but they can't just clone Old Spice," randomly Makoto remembered Rin's desire from elementary school of wanting to swim in a pool full of cherry blossoms and found himself smiling, imagining Rin advertising Matsuoka Rin's Aqua Cherry perfume in a commercial where he swam in a pool full of cherry blossoms. Makoto kind of really wanted to see that.

Makoto's day dreaming was cut short when he received a phone call from Shiori to fill him in on the movie job, "It's a total waste of time," she was saying, "Movies have huge lag time. Assuming this bloody movie ever wraps-up, it'll still be in post-production for months, if not a full year. The release date will be sometime next year and even then, I doubt it'll be anything other than something to keep your fans talking. But it is a favour and in showbiz, people owing you favours is a big deal."

"It sounds fun at any rate," commented Makoto, "I am looking forward to it."

"I am glad," Shiori hung-up, having already learnt from Makoto the mere formality of the audition had gone well and mostly consisted of him wearing a rough fitting spandex mer-tail and swimming a bit in a public pool.

It hadn't been easy for Makoto but he probably had an advantage in that he had watched Haru move underwater all his life. So Makoto could close his eyes and picture Haru gliding underwater, his legs locked as if they were stuffed inside a mer-tail and swimming while barely moving his arms. It was very different from Makoto's own swimming style and Makoto had felt he had been rough and ungainly. He would need to practice more, which is why they gave him the spandex tail to keep, but the client was generally satisfied.

The proper made to order silicon tail was being made by the Mertailor, who had already been commissioned and was just waiting on Makoto's measurements to complete it. It would be here in about two weeks. Makoto hoped the real tail would fit better because the spandex tail was a bit tight. But he had a lot of work to do beforehand and of course, he now had this movie thing to worry about. Makoto sighed, he might not be able to go home for summer afterall. He hoped Ren and Ran wouldn't be too angry with him. At least they had stopped crying over skype these days.

* * *

It was generally impractical for Makoto and Rin to make any firm plans to meet during the week. But every now and again Makoto's work brought him close to Rin's training centre of his dorm and they met-up for food or a movie and on the odd occasion a trip to the public bath.

Today, however, Rin had specifically called Makoto up and asked him to go to a bath with him and have dinner after. Rin was tense and quiet. Makoto could see the tension oozing off, of him. Finally he asked, "What's up?"

Rin sighed, "I wondered why no one had brought-up our relay from the regional tournaments during my interview for the training program. Today I found out why."

Makoto pulled a face, he didn't have any regrets letting Rin swim in the relay with them. Well he regretted that Rei and Rin couldn't both swim the butterfly leg but that was about it. The fact that Iwatobi High Swim Club had been suspended from the remaining tournaments for the rest of the school year, their principal had reprimanded them and cut their club budget to the bare minimum were things he had been willing to endure to see Rin smile again.

However, friendship is magic didn't really wash with FINA or Japan National Team. So Makoto had wondered why neither Rin nor Haru had been grilled about the incident at the regional tournament during their interviews. Makoto remained silent though, and only encouraged Rin to continue with his eyes. He didn't want to push if Rin didn't want to talk.

"Firstly, Coach Sasabe wrote letters to the appropriate authorities explain our history and how we didn't mean any disrespect but how Haru and you guys were just trying to save me from depression or worse," said Rin, "I didn't know he had done that," Makoto knew, it was how they had avoid the summary closure of the swim club, "Captain Mikoshiba also wrote a letter and um…" Rin looked away.

"He um… googled my old school out of curiosity and found out about Anne," Rin went on after a moment, "Well not that she was my girlfriend or anything but how she had killed herself while I was there and how her death had sparked the investigation that led to the discovery of a decade long sexual abuse of swim team students by the breaststroke coach," Rin pursed his lips, "With his letter he included news articles about the scandal and made the case for leniency for me because I was clearly messed-up and maybe even suicidal and whatever else…" Rin huffed, "I was never suicidal. Depressed as hell but never suicidal. I wouldn't do that to Gou or my mom." Rin fell silent.

"Japan does have an abnormally high youth suicide rate," offered Makoto, "It's an obvious thing to worry about. Rei thought Haru might harm himself following his loss to you last year."

"Huh!" exclaimed Rin, "Haru?! He's not that weak of a person!"

"I know that, you know that, but Rei didn't," said Makoto gently.

Rin huffed again and again fell into silence. Makoto waited patiently. Finally Rin started talking again, "I don't know how the contents of my private file became locker room knowledge but it did. Today I wasn't just taunted with accusations of being an honourless traitor or a blind moron who couldn't tell which team I was on but asked if I had been touched in Australia," Makoto's mouth tightened and his face lost all gentleness. At that moment he did resemble a dangerous killer whale.

"I didn't care about that but then someone brought-up Anne. It was totally a random shot in the dark, had to be, how could they know? You are literally the only one in Japan who knows about Anne. Even my mom and Gou don't know the whole story. All they know is that I had a cute blond girlfriend in 7th grade. they haven't mentioned her since I told them we broke-up sometime in 8th grade. But…"

"But?" prompted Makoto gently.

"I lost it," said Rin, "I turned on the guy for suggesting Anne might have liked it, that her lips might have said no but maybe her body said yes. He wondered out loud how loose she was and if I had, had a taste of her charms and I lost it!" Rin covered his face, he could feel tears start of form in his eyes so he sunk down into the bath until he was submerged.

Makoto looked around but the bath was still empty. The one two salarymen who had been in the other end of the bath when they first came in were long gone. So when Rin surfaced, Makoto didn't hesitate to pull him in for a hug. They were completely naked but Makoto didn't care, Rin had always been more of a physical person so Makoto figured he wanted, no needed, the physical contact. Makoto was right because Rin buried his face in the crook of Makoto's neck and let the tears flow freely.

"Mikoshiba pulled me off him," said Rin, "Then I was dragged away to face management. They suspended me, Makoto! All that work and they suspended me…" Rin sobbed, "It's over! I have a disciplinary hearing next week but its over! My record is against me. I am an inconsistent performer who embarrassed his school at regional tournaments. I was on thin ice to begin with and now it's over! Management basically told me that they only overlooked the regional incident because of Coach Sasabe's and Mikoshiba's letter and told me that I should perform a dogeza to them both to ask their forgiveness for messing-up the chance their words that brought me. It's over! I failed."

For a long time Makoto just hugged Rin and let him cry, rubbing his back in soothing patterns, similar to what he would do with Ren or Ran. Finally when Rin had calmed a bit, "Don't give-up yet," whispered Makoto, "It's too early to give-up. I know its hard but I think the best thing you can do, including to the memory of Anne, is to open-up at the disciplinary hearing. Explain… everything," Makoto gently suggested.

"I mean, I am not saying you were right to lash out but that guy shouldn't have been taunting you. Especially not by suggesting a poor girl who was raped and committed suicide somehow asked for all those horrible things to happen to her," Makoto continued, "I mean, he didn't know how important she was to you but the point is that she is important to you. Plus you need to know how the whole locker room found out about your past. Was the content of your private file leaked? I don't think Mikoshiba told anyone and I don't think you have been advertise what school you used to go to. But they found out somehow and you deserve to know how. You're a victim here too Rin. So don't give-up."

Rin didn't answer, only burrowed himself deeper into Makoto's arm. Only barely remembered to keep their lower regions at a respectable distance because this was really not the time for that kind of thing. Finally after he had calmed a little, he pulled back, "Thanks Makoto, I am glad you are here with me," he said, managing a faint smile.

Makoto smiled back reassuringly, abruptly remembering Haru's words from the night before the regionals but opted not to bring Haru up. Makoto didn't know why but he felt that Rin might be hurt if Haru was brought-up. "Come stay with me," Makoto suddenly offered, "You have been suspended right? So you don't have swim practice. The dorm might be uncomfortable for you until your disciplinary hearing. So come stay with me until then."

"You… you don't mind?" asked Rin.

"Of course not! I only hope it won't be too cramped for you to stay for longer than a night. It is a pretty small apartment," said Makoto sheepishly.

"Don't worry about that," replied Rin, "I am used to cramped dorms afterall," shortly after they left the bath house and headed to Rin's dorm so he could pack-up what little he had.

As soon as Rin entered the dorm building he was glad that he only had to grab his things and leave. The hostile stares of people who had never been all that friendly followed him every step of the way. So he quickened his step and just thought of Makoto waiting for him outside and how it was only going to be a little time before he would be free from all the hostility. But as soon as he entered his dorm room he realised that he had one unavoidable confrontation before he could escape into the little bubble of warmth and happiness he had found in Makoto's company. Mikoshiba was waiting for him in his room.

He looked angry? Disappointed? Rin couldn't tell, "Why?" he asked Rin simply.

Why? That short question had such a long answer. So Rin decided to try and buy himself some time, "How did they know about my old school?" Rin wondered.

"I didn't tell them if that's what you are asking," snapped Mikoshiba.

"I know you wouldn't, captain," replied Rin.

"I am not your captain any more," said Mikoshiba dismissively, "As for how they knew, an old… acquaintance of yours from Australia is an exchange student at the same university Kuza attends. I am not sure how you came-up in conversation but you did and apparently this acquaintance of yours basically called you a whore and then went into detail about all the girls and boys you banged while in Australia. He was the one who told Kuza about the sex scandal at your old school and talked about how he wondered if you had been touched and the hyper sexual activity on your part was… compensating for the abuse you suffered."

Rin pulled a face, this was too much. He hadn't slept with that many people. Certainly by his old school's standards he was a veritable prude. But this wasn't the time to think about his sexual record. He looked at Mikoshiba and felt that he did owe him an explanation, not only because of what he had done and put-up with in the past but also because of what he was doing now. Kuza couldn't have just volunteered the information to Mikoshiba.

Rin sighed, "I wasn't touched or anything like that," said Rin, "But that girl who died was my girlfriend. My first love, first kiss, first… a lot of things. We broke-up because I didn't have time for her. Because swimming was more important. Sometime after, she started getting abused. I didn't notice," Rin looked away as Mikoshiba's eyes widen in surprise, "I did sleep around a bit. But I wasn't compensating for anything except loneliness," he kept his eyes averted because he didn't want to know the face Mikoshiba was making at that moment.

"Anyway, that's not important. Point is that after Anne died I found out that the school used my... sexual misadventures over her to keep her silent. She still cared about me, like I still cared about her and she didn't want to see me get expelled. She was…" Rin sighed, "Protecting me. So her death…" Rin paused, before continuing, "Kuza could have called me a whore or worse and I wouldn't have cared but he didn't have any right to taunt her. He especially didn't have a right to suggest she somehow had what happened to her coming. She didn't. Even if I didn't love her I would have still found what he said disgusting."

"You might get expelled over this," Mikoshiba pointed out, but there was no heat in his voice.

Rin sighed, "You should stop trying to protect me, captain," he said, "Nothing good seems to happen to people who try to protect me or help me," abruptly he thought of Makoto but he pushed that thought aside. He didn't want to think about some harm coming to Makoto because of him. Right now, Makoto's warmth was the only thing keeping him together.

This time Mikoshiba did not bother correcting Rin, instead he said, "Don't worry about it. I mean, you are going to be my brother-in-law in the future, so of course I am going to protect you," he said with a grin.

This at once sent Rin in a protective rage over Gou but he checked himself and decided instead to reverse the situation and say, "Huh! I didn't know you were keen to unload your little sister on me! Is she pretty? I only go for cute girl you know."

Mikoshiba laughed his full rich laugh, "Nice try but Nitori has already recruited me on to the MakoRin ship. I am cheering you on, Matsuoka!"

Rin was caught so off-guard that all he could do was blush and blush deeply. This prompted Mikoshiba to laugh some more before he sobered and said, "Good luck with the disciplinary hearing," and left.

Rin quietly packed-up his belonging and only stopped to let the dorm manager know he wouldn't be back for the foreseeable future before meeting-up with Makoto outside. That night as Rin went to sleep in Makoto's tiny six tatami apartment, he wished for a lot of things. But mostly he wished he could crawl into Makoto's futon and pull Makoto on top of him and let him kiss away all his myriad of worries.

* * *

**Author's Note:** So the bit at the start of the chapter about the crab festival is from the drama CD. I noticed that Rin has a tendency to just acknowledge Haru and not really the others., including Makoto. Doesn't mean he doesn't care but if I were Haru, it would be one of the things that mislead me into thinking that Rin could never fall for Makoto. Indeed, why Makoto himself might not realise that Rin had fallen for him. So I wanted to bring that aspect of canon interaction in to justify why both Haru and Makoto might miss some rather obvious clues Rin is dropping.

Also yes, the Mertailor is a real thing. You can google The Mertailor and buy mer-tail for yourself from him. The spandex tail also comes from him FYI. He does take 5-10 weeks to make the silicon tails and 4-6 weeks to make the spandex tails but I for this fic I assumed that perfume company put in a rushed order for a not very detailed/for training spandex tail roughly in Makoto's size that they got ASAP and told him to get working on the proper tail while they finalised the deal with Makoto… i.e. I cheated with the timeline.

Lastly, I am one of the people who LOATHED episode 12 and I was going to type-up a whole rant about how crap it was. But then I thought, why waste time typing a rant when I could just use the time to type this fic and show that the consequences of a move like that couldn't be dismissed simply as "boys will be boys" as Amakata did. Add in the dead girlfriend I gave Rin as a backstory for this fic and I get to torture Rin! I am sorry, I'll go sit in the corner now.

Anyway, thank you to everyone who has struck with this story for 18 chapters. I hope you are still enjoying it. Next chapter, Haru makes his dramatic return and for better or for worse, puts an end to all MakoRin fluff!


	19. Chapter 19

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

There was no Rin when Makoto awoke in the morning. Indeed, int the first groggy moments, Makoto nearly forgot that anything had changed as Rin had neatly put away the futon he had used after he had gotten up. It was only the sight of Rin's bags that brought the night before back to Makoto's mind and he wondered where Rin could be this early in the morning.

He checked his phone and looked around for a note. There was nothing. Makoto decided it was too early to worry and got-up to wash-up and get breakfast started. He wondered what Rin would like. Pancakes probably but Makoto didn't think he had any pancake mix. Omelette maybe? With cheese and mushrooms? Rin burnt through a lot of calories so he could pretty much each anything he wanted as long as it wasn't empty calories. "Ah but he wasn't going to be training until the disciplinary hearing", Makoto remembered.

The thought actually got Makoto seriously worried and about more than just breakfast choice. What was Rin going to do if he didn't have training to fill his time? Makoto knew that if left to idle, Rin might well think the worst thoughts and get himself down. Although he could appreciate Rin's current predicament taking up a lot of his thought process and so he probably couldn't do much but doing nothing was probably a very bad idea.

Makoto started frying the omelette, a large one with four eggs, as he gave some thought to how he could maybe distract his friend without annoying him. He had just plated-up the omelette when Rin returned. From his get-up it was clear he had been jogging.

"Hey," said Makoto cheerfully, "I made breakfast," offering Rin the omelette. Rin looked at the single plate of omelette and raised his eyebrows questioningly, "I am going to have some cereal," explained Makoto smiling.

"I could have just had cereal too," said Rin, a little put out by the extra trouble he caused Makoto.

"Nay, I know you like a more substantial breakfast," replied Makoto, "Sorry its not as good as your cooking."

"Idiot, don't apologize," said Rin, taking the plate, "It's bad enough that you got-up and cooked. Thanks for the food."

"I hope you enjoy it," said Makot simply and got his own bowl of cereal.

They ate in silence as Makoto thought more on how he could distract Rin without imposing on him too much. Wait, maybe imposing on Rin might be what he needed to do. "Hey Rin, what are you up to today?" he wondered.

Rin shrugged, "Suspension from training means my day is pretty free. Why?"

"Want to help me train to be a merman this evening?" Makoto asked.

"Huh?"

Makoto explained his next job and finished with, "Thursdays is when I go train with my swim team anyway. Well mornings and afternoon I'll be at my school. Today is the one day of face to face contact I have. Afterwards I go train at the swim club. Normally, 5 to 7 is when I train with the coach. Well mostly I follow the training regime and the coach observes me to make sure I am not picking up any bad habits or letting my form slack. Nothing more serious than that." Makoto explained, "But today I was only going to train for an hour before starting my merman training. I booked out two lanes for that starting at 6. Would be nice to have someone there just observing me and you know, seeing if I am being mermaidy enough."

"Heh, Makoto the merman, I like it!" said Rin, "I am in!"

"Great!" replied Makoto, slightly relieved but there was still the matter of what Rin would be doing while Makoto was at school.

Either Rin sensed Makoto's concern or was simply thinking out loud but he addressed Makoto's unspoken question by explaining, "I should probably get upto date with my school work too. I really need to keep my grades up now that the whole swimming things looks like its going to fall through."

"You should keep your grades up anyway," said Makoto, "I mean, swimming isn't really a lifetime career unless you become a coach after you stop competing."

"Hey, not to brag or anything, I am in the top ten in all my subjects!" Rin protested, "But honestly, I never really gave much thought to what I might do at university or anything like that. Probably about time I started."

"I know what you mean," said Makoto, "I need to start thinking about that too."

"So you want to go to university?" asked Rin.

"Well I might not be able to if my career really takes off," said Makoto, "But when I was still hauling fish I was thinking of a few career paths. Nothing concrete, just random ideas," admitted Makoto, "I guess a lot of it depended on Haru because I sort of wanted to go to the same university as him. But," Makoto sighed, "Other times I thought it might be nice for us both if we had some distance between us. Just, just because I didn't want to be suffocating Haru."

"What about Haru suffocating you?" Rin wanted to ask but he didn't really want to hear a long explanation on how Haru couldn't possible suffocate Makoto. It would piss him off too much. He was kind of tempted to suggest that maybe this separation had done them some good but he swallowed that too. Instead he went back to eating.

* * *

After Makoto left, Rin did his best to get some study done but his mind wouldn't settle for long on his school work. He kept thinking about what he would tell his mom and Gou. How was he going to face them after all the sacrifices they had made? He never even had the guts to tell them he wanted to quit swimming in Middle School. Instead, he had gone back to Australia and kept mindlessly training. He just didn't compete more than he absolutely had to. He probably wouldn't have returned if his mother hadn't pulled him out after the sex abuse scandal broke.

Giving-up on his studies, Rin lay back on the floor and just let his mind drift for a bit. Unfortunately it kept drifting into territory he did not want it drifting to. Then he remembered Makoto's request. "Merman ha?"

Rin got-up and retrieved his tablet from his bag and started by visiting the website of the Mertailor who Makoto had told him was making his fins. Rin quickly discovered that the Mertailor was a man who, as far as Rin could tell, was also the world's best known "real life merman". He had a selection of Youtube videos up showing how he swam while wearing the fin.

Rin highly technical mind quickly started trying to adapt what the "merman" was doing to how he knew Makoto swam and realised he needed to make a lot of modification to get the swimming suited to Makoto's much bulkier frame. Plus there was something in the merman's swimming that irritated the hell out of Rin. So he started looking at the some other videos, these of mermaid performers and quickly picked-up on a potential problem.

All the mermaids and mermen tended to be filmed or viewed from above the waterline while they themselves were at least partially submerged but according to Makoto, he was going to be swimming in a simulated coral reef environment at the Tokyo aquarium and would be filmed with underwater cameras while he was fully submerged. I.e. he and the photographic equipment would both be underwater. Makoto's movements needed to be a lot smoother or else he wouldn't be able to be a convincing merman.

Getting one of his rough work notebooks out, Rin started sketching out forms and planning limb movement. He even tried on Makoto's spandex tail, which Makoto had left for him to have a look at and bring with him later. Rin felt ridiculous wearing the tail and wondered at the psychology of people who sincerely wanted to be merpeople.

"Haru might understand," Rin thought absently as his slipped out of the tail, "I wonder if he would ever give-up his legs for mer-tail if a reverse Ariel offer was made to him." Rin honestly didn't know but amused himself imagining Haru taking a job as a merman performer and working at a resort somewhere entertaining children and their families as he got back to thinking-up how Makoto could pull off a convincing merman.

* * *

By the end of the day Rin was pretty excited over the whole thing and ended-up coming at 5 PM to the aquatic centre. He had checked the aquatic centres website and found that it had a number of pools. One was reserved for training by national team swimmers who were NOT part of the national team training program and instead had personal coaches. The other was used by for training by semi-professional team and that was the team Makoto trained with.

Those were the Olympic size pools but then the facility had a couple of small pools open to the general public and a gym. Both of which could be accessed by non-members for a fee. Rin figured he might as well train with some weights while he waited for Makoto. He had second thoughts when in the lobby he ran into an official from the national swimming training program who shot Rin an intimidating stare. But the moment passed and after a polite nod of greeting and acknowledgement, Rin pressed on to the receptionist. There was, afterall, no reason Rin couldn't use the facilities at this aquatic center.

Working out always calmed Rin, so he pretty much forgot about the lobby encounter and was in as good a mood as he could be when he finally met-up with Makoto.

"Thanks for bringing my tail," said Makoto.

Rin shrugged, "What's the plan?" he asked, now that he was here, Rin felt shy about disclosing just how much thought he had given the whole thing. Afterall, Makoto had only asked him to observe a bit and see if he was being mermaidy enough. He hadn't asked him to conduct extensive research on merpeople performers and develop special strokes and techniques for him.

"Ah, help me take the lane divider off first," said Makoto, "Then I'll put on the tail and swim a bit and you can umm… comment," he finished lamely.

"Sure, whatever," said Rin.

They had one of the end lanes and lane adjacent to that and after they were done taking the lane divider off, Makoto struggled into a tail a little bit too comically before sort of rolling into the pool. Rin had the grace to hide his smile behind his hand. Makoto than swam like he had been practicing for a bit before surfacing and asking, "How was that?"

"Are you trying to mimic Haru?" exclaimed Rin in disbelief.

"Well…"

"Makoto, you are NOT Haru," Rin pointed out, exasperated, "You are bulkier and don't have the same smooth movement."

"I know that!" protested Makoto.

Rin sighed, "Be glad I am here," he sat down on the pool edge dangling his feet into the water and beckoned Makoto to come to him, "I think I have a good idea for how to turn your assets, your strenght and power, into a swim style befitting a merman. One line summary, infrequent but powerful tale movements!"

"Um… okay," said Makoto, which was the last time he spoke for a long time as Rin started explaining all the things he had thought-up.

* * *

"You would make a great coach one day," Makoto commented as they neared the end of the time they had the lanes to themselves.

Rin snorted. "I am serious!" declared Makoto, "You are such a technical swimmer," Makoto pointed out, "I mean, I just tried to copy Haru because that's all I could think of. But you, you researched mermaid performers, thought of my build, my current strokes," Makoto smiled, "Remembered my strokes in the first place and then came-up with a swim style just for me. All in a day! That's really impressive."

"It wasn't that big of a deal," said Rin, blushing a bit at the compliment, "I mean, it's not like I came-up with a whole new stroke like the guy who invented the butterfly stroke!" Makoto just smiled.

"Let's put the lane divider back," suggested Makoto, "It's almost time and it'll take me a bit to get out of the tail."

They put the lane divider back with couple of minutes to spare but the pool was pretty quiet so it wasn't like anyone was going to rush to share their lanes and no one was going to kicked them out. So Rin suggested, "Let's race."

"Eh?"

"Let's race Breast like we used to," Rin elaborated, "It should be fair. You race Back now and I race Free and Butterfly," Rin pointed out and then smiled, "I just got a bit nostalgic for the day of our youth when you and I used to compete against each other in breaststroke."

"Rin, we are 17," Makoto pointed out with a laugh, "I am pretty sure that's too young to be talking about the days of our youth!"

"Just indulge me already!" complained Rin.

"Fine, fine but if I recall, you used to beat me a lot," said Makoto indulgently.

"That's not what I remember," said Rin, "I remember eating your wake, a lot!"

"Only in the hundred meters," Makoto pointed out, "And only if they had a long course."

"Ha! So you do remember soundly handing my ass to me on more than one occasion," teased Rin, "So its time for my long overdue revenge in the 100m Breast! Prepare yourself Tachibana, to taste defeat!"

"Fine, fine," said Makoto, "But we don't have anyone to give the start signal."

"We'll just ask someone," they ended-up asking a pool attendant who was loitering nearby.

It wasn't a particularly fast pace as they were both rather rusty when it came to the breaststroke. Nagisa would have beaten them both with relative ease. In the end Rin won but not by much, "Congratulations," said Makoto honestly with a wide smile

"And that's why we were never rivals," said Rin with a sigh.

"Eh? You mean because I am not nearly as good as you and Haru and never will be no matter how hard I try?" asked Makoto, just an honest straightforward question.

"No you self-deprecating dumbass," declared Rin a little annoyed, "You're too nice! For all Haru's declarations of not caring about winning or losing, he honestly does hate having someone ahead of him. If he didn't, I would never have been able to get under his skin would I?" reasoned Rin, "You on the other hand really honestly don't care. All you really care about is doing your best. As long as you think you have done your best. You are happy with the result. You can't develop a rivalry with a guy like that."

"I don't know," replied Makoto, still smiling, "I mean, I was pretty upset when I lost my individual event in the prefectural tournament last year."

"I bet for all of 2 seconds," said Rin dismissively. Makoto only smiled.

"Why did you only race Breast," asked Rin suddenly, "As a kid I mean."

"Well I never really tried Back properly until I had to swim Back in the relay by default," explained Makoto, "I was never any good in Butterfly, a little too technical for me," said Makoto a little sheepishly, "That only left freestyle front crawl but if I raced that, I would have to race against Haru. I didn't want to be against Haru in anything so…" Makoto grinned.

Rin sighed, "Why am I not surprised," he muttered.

Further conversation between the two were interrupted when the National Team official Rin had earlier seen the lobby came striding towards them looking grim, "Out of the pool, Matsuoka," he ordered, "And report to the locker area A for testing."

Rin blinked, "Testing?"

"Dope testing," said the official looking irritated, "You left the dorm without telling anyone where you were going. So you missed a test when the officials went there to test everyone. You are lucky I saw you come in and could inform them you were here when they came to test some of the athletes training here. Otherwise you would have registered a miss and right now, you really can't afford any black marks against your record."

Rin couldn't really argue with that and got out of the pool. "I'll wait for you in the lobby," said Makoto. Rin just nodded.

* * *

Something was wrong, something was very, very wrong. Rin had been part of the anti-doping program for a very long time. The Australians had no tolerance for performance enhancing drugs. If only because they liked having the moral high ground on the issue and they couldn't if their athletes were caught cheating. So Rin knew what a routine testing was supposed to be like, this was not a routine test. Everybody was too tense.

"Where have you been?" demanded one of the officials, "You are supposed to inform us of your whereabouts."

Rin took a moment to curb his temper, "I was with a friend. His address is on your systems since I stay with him pretty regularly. I just decided to stay at his place last night."

"The dorm didn't know where you had gone," said the still irate official, "Nor did the program officials. You need to better inform people."

Rin simply nodded and held his tongue. His blood was taken and he was handed a urine cup. Per protocol, he had to pee in front of the official so that it was clear he didn't tamper with the sample in some way. "At least if I get kicked out," thought Rin, "I won't have to put-up with this shit anymore," he sighed, "We done?" he asked the official after handing back the sample. The official nodded and after giving him another lecture about keeping the right authorities updated of his whereabouts, told him he could go.

In the hallway outside the changing area he ran back into the National Team official who glared at Rin and demanded, "Why the hell did you have to punch Kuza," he sighed but before Rin could answer he added, "This scandal is on your head Matsuoka. Remember that when you get back to training," with that he left.

Get back to training? What was he on about? Rin had a disciplinary hearing on monday and that's when his fate would be decided right? Rin dismissed the man's comment as random nothing and headed to the locker room, locker room B, where he had stored his gear. He was pretty hungry and just wanted to go somewhere with Makoto and eat.

* * *

Friday found them both at home and so they decided to study together. "You can help me with English," declared Makoto, "It's one of my worst subjects."

"How?" wondered Rin, "I have heard you speak english. You are quite fluent."

"Speaking is not the problem," replied Makoto, "I also understand it pretty well when I read it or hear it, well as long as the speaker isn't speaking too quickly," he amended.

"Then what's the issue?" wondered Rin. Makoto handed him a piece of his english writing. Rin's eyes went wide at the terrible spelling, "What the hell, Makoto! Are you spelling these phonetically?"

"Well…"

Rin groaned, then grinned, "Well fine! You can help me with Japanese and I'll see what I can do about your atrocious spelling."

Makoto smiled, "Deal!"

They were so absorbed in their studies, which did frequently degenerated into Rin laughing at Makoto over his difficulties in English and Makoto trying not to make fun of Rin for being so weak in Japanese language that Rin didn't notice he had two rather important emails waiting for him until late in the afternoon.

The first email was from the national swimming program management informing him that his disciplinary hearing had been cancelled. They were not interested in hearing his side of the story and were making their decision based on the fact that Rin had punched a teammate. He was suspended until monday after next. After that he was to resume training per normal. He should consider this his first warning. One more and he was out. He could appeal if he wanted and get a hearing.

If Rin had, had a clean past, he would have appealed. But his actions in the Regional tournaments were already hanging over him and besides, he didn't really want to discuss Anne with officials who were probably not unlike those whose refusal to believe Anne contributed to her death. Yet the sudden decision just made Rin think something was seriously wrong.

The second email was from Mikoshiba and that clarified everything, "Well you just punched open a can of worms," Mikoshiba opened jovially, "If you'll recall, Kuza got a nosebleed from your punch and they took him to the hospital. His nose wouldn't stop bleeding. They got worried and ran a few tests but couldn't figure out what was going on. They asked him if he was on any medication but he said he just took some WADA approved health supplements. The doctor treating him wanted to see them so he got his girlfriend to run them over from his apartment."

Rin could almost see Mikoshiba grinning as he read the next part, "She got the WADA approved health supplements. But, bless the ditzy, she also got the pills, and I am quoting one of my senpai's from Samezuka who, being a current classmate of Kuza went with him to the hospital, 'also the pills hidden in the secret compartment under the bed'. Not sure who called the anti-doping agency but they were called and now we are all being blanket tested. Especially since its a new drug they hadn't known about before. They can't have a hearing for you any more because they are trying to bury the Kuza story. The anti-doping agency is co-operating. This is Japan afterall, no one likes losing face. Do yourself a favour and don't make any noises."

Rin translated the last statement as, accept whatever punishment they hand you short of expulsion and don't appeal. Good thing he wasn't going to appeal in the first place, otherwise he might have gotten pissed at Mikoshiba's suggestion that he just lay there and take whatever they threw at him.

Rin filled Makoto in, "That's great news! I mean," he quickly added, "The drug scandal isn't good…" Makoto's phone vibrated, it was Shiori.

"You were born under a lucky star," Shiori declared.

"I was?"

"Don't spread it around, but there was some sort of dust-up in the national swimming program locker room. A swimmer go punched into a locker and one thing lead to another, he was caught as a drug cheat," explained Shiori.

"Ah yeah… I kind of knew all that," replied Makoto sheepishly.

"Really? Ah but of course, your friend Matsuoka… don't tell me, he was involved in the dust-up!" exclaimed Shiori.

"Well…"

Shiori laughed out loud, "Maybe you just have good friends then," she replied, "Because we just got handed an amazing cross-over concept for your debut."

"We did?"

"The current anticipated damage is rather high in terms of sheer number of swimmers they might lose," said Shiori, "I suspect junior members will quietly be dropped from the program while any senior members will suddenly declare their retirement. As long as none of their medal winners from the last Olympics, Asian games or World championships are caught in the scandal, they shouldn't have any issues burying the story. However, they will be open to positive distraction involving their swimmers."

"Okay," said Makoto, still not getting it.

"Yoshino is already in discussions with them to do a show in mid to late July," said Shiori, "Just imagine, a stage in the middle of a pool. First a lone swimmer enters the pool area, you, gets in the backstroke start position and is given his signal. You swim to the centre stage and start singing Rage On. As the song nears the end we bring in one swimmer of each type, new swimmers from this years program to watch in the upcoming Asian games. The song ends they dive in! It's perfect!" declared Shiori, "Which reminds me, find a way to include the whole ready-set-go thing as the last line of Rage On."

"Ah okay," said Makoto, "We'll do our best."

"No, just do it!" ordered Shiori, "Anyway, we'll give each of the swimmer their own personal intro after you song ends. We'll get you to do one or two more songs, between or during which we'll find a way to include more of the swim team stars, present stars that is. Swim Team gets some positive chatter, fans will hopefully get pumped and go out and get your debut single, the creative team putting this together get a demo to put forward as part of their portfolio for Tokyo opening ceremony participations… everybody wins!"

"That's great!"

"Of course it is! Now get that song finished and recorded. But," added Shiori, "Just don't take anything from Shinji to 'help you along'. Knowing Shinji he's going to relapse, if he hasn't already. He can't handle pressure at all. So he's pockets will sooner or later be filled with pills," she said distastefully, "Just don't take any of it."

"I already said I won't," replied Makoto, exasperated. Why didn't anyone trust him?

"Just reminding you," said Shiori before hanging-up.

"Well?" asked Rin after Makoto put the phone away. Makoto explained what Shiori had told him. Rin laughed, "I guess I better make sure I am the butterfly swimmer included in your show. I would be really jealous otherwise."

Makoto smiled, "I would really like that."

* * *

Dear Nanase-san,

We know our initial condition for your entry into the national training program was that you win your designated events at that national level. However, we have altered our position. We would like you to come next week for a time trial. Depending on the times you post and provided you return clean results from our drug test, we'll be happy to offer you a position in the national swim training program.

Sincerely,

The Head of the Training Program.

Haru read and re-read the official letter to convince himself he was not dreaming. He didn't know what had happened in Tokyo but clearly something had happened. But honestly, Haru didn't care. All he cared was that he was going to see Makoto again and much sooner than expected. Because there was just no way Haru was not going to post the best times of his life.

* * *

**Author's note:** Well this chapter ran away from me… *sigh* WADA is the World Anti-Doping Agency. Each country has their own branch, as far as I know. I am assuming the Japanese branch of WADA wouldn't be prone to call a press conference unless they absolutely had to or they were made to by their higher-ups.

Recent character profile stuff said Makoto's worst subjects in school were English and Art while his best was Japanese language. Rin's worst subjects is Japanese language and classical literature while his best are English and Math. Now best and worst and relative. It just means their ranking in those subjects is lower than their ranking in their other subjects. Doesn't actually mean they are bad in the subjects. But I found the fact that Makoto's best subject is Rin's worst and vice versa funny and so got them to study together. ^.^


	20. Chapter 20

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

Haru wanted to surprise Makoto. So he decided not to call him to let him know that he was coming to Tokyo. Haru's time trial was scheduled for the following Friday. Haru decided to stay at a cheap hotel near the training centre on thursday night ahead of his time trials. Then once he had passed his time trials and got into the national swimming program, he would surprise Makoto at his apartment and they would have the weekend all to themselves.

Well, Rin did usually spend the weekend with Makoto but he would understand Haru's desire to have Makoto all to himself for sometime. Besides, Haru was still convinced Rin would lose all interest in Makoto and focus wholly on competing with Haru once Haru had settled into the national training program. If anything, Rin would probably spend that weekend training fiercely so that he could race Haru at peak condition come monday. Whichever way, Haru was certain he and Makoto would have plenty of time to just chill-out and get back in the grove of always finding each other when they reached out.

* * *

Even though Rin's swimming future was no longer uncertain, Makoto could not help but worry about him. What was Rin going to do starting Monday for the week he was still suspended? Was it okay for him to just sit in Makoto's six tatami apartment where there was nothing much to do? Makoto had internet and Rin access to Makoto's laptop and Rin's own tablet and laptop but that's about it. That could not be enough distraction for someone like Rin. Makoto stifled a sigh so as to not alert Rin to his gloomy thoughts as he watched him cook while humming softly.

"You really love cooking don't you?" asked Makoto with smile.

"Too much Master Chef," replied Rin, "Not that I think I could ever be a chef myself. I don't like cooking fast and I don't think I could deal with the whining customers and stuff," Rin went on, "But I did think about maybe studying culinary arts in a technical school along with swimming training after high school and doing recipe development and testing. Maybe eventually write a cookbook or something."

"I would buy your cookbook," declared Makoto.

Rin turned around and grinned, "And be one of those people that never cook a single recipe from it!"

Makoto pouted, "I would try and cook at least one!" he protested, "If there was mackerel recipe, I would try cooking it for me and Haru."

"I wouldn't have mackerels," replied Rin turning back to his cooking, his mood dropping a bit, "Just good ol' meat and vegetables!"

"Eh? No seafood?" asked Makoto.

"Seafood makes you sad," Rin pointed out.

"Only because I am away from Haru, I would be okay if I am with Haru," said Makoto.

This line of conversation wasn't exactly making Rin happy, so he decided to change the subject, "Maybe I'll look into the whole culinary school think while I am still suspended. Not like I have anything better to do and it is probably high time I think about my future."

"You could also help me keep training to be a merman," suggested Makoto, "The shoot is next Friday. So I have lanes bookings all week for training."

"I would like that," admitted Rin, "Besides, I should keep training on my own and so I'll probably end-up spending a lot of time at that sports center anyway."

Makoto grinned, everything seemed in control, "Great!"

"What about you?" asked Rin, "What do you have going next week apart from merman training and the merman shoot?"

Makoto sighed, "Doing a bit part in a movie," he said, "Or maybe I am an extra, I am not sure."

"What's the difference?" wondered Rin.

"The way Shiori-san described it is that in a convenience store scene, extras are all the other customers in the background who don't have any lines or interaction with actors on whom the camera is focused but there simply to make the store feel busy or just well attended. While the bit part is the check-out clerk who interacts with one of the stars or at least supporting actors and might even have a line or two," Makoto explained, "I am supposed to be a samurai retainer but I think I am sort of just in the scene and don't have any lines. But I am not exactly in the background. Probably a bit of a grey area, I think."

"You sighed before," Rin pointed out, "Not looking forward to it."

"The production is supposed to be troubled and so everything is a bit confusing. All I know is that I am on the call sheet for monday and that's it. I understand this is pretty normal and that when I get to set I'll see the continuity sheet and know which scenes are being shot and what I have to do," explained Makoto, unconsciously slipping in movie production terminology but Rin could follow without difficulty.

"I am used to not finding out what the concept is or what I have to do exactly until I turn-up at the shoot but I would like to know a bit more about the movie. But it doesn't seem like anybody knows what the movie is about any more," Makoto sighed before continuing on with his explanation, "It started off as a straight samurai period piece but then they decided it was too boring as a straightforward historical drama. So they decided it would be an alternate reality and so no one has to have topknots and can speak with more modern dialect," Makoto went on, "But apparently that's all there is to the alternate reality. So Shiori-san thinks that one of the stars decided that he didn't look good in a topknot and used his star power to have the script changed. But others are saying that there is magic and steampunk in the story now and the director is very demanding and wouldn't let any stars steamroll him. It's all very confusing."

"Sounds like it," said Rin, "But as long as you get paid right!" Makoto agreed and since food was done, they sat down to eat.

* * *

"You can come too if you like," Shiori told Rin when she came to pick-up Makoto on Monday, "They are still desperate for bodies and I am sure they can stick you in a role that won't require you to return."

Rin thought for a moment. He should really start training again but then again, "Why not," said Rin, "I'll be a movie star for the day!"

Rin piled into the backseat of Shiori's car with Shiori's other charge, Toko Retsu, who was also going to be part of the shoot. Makoto took the front passenger seat at Shiori's request. Toko shot Makoto a dirty look but kept his mouth shut. But the look didn't escape Rin.

Shiori spent much of the car ride talking to Makoto about his debut single and album. Including the number of songs recorded, which songs Shinji wrote, which songs Makoto wrote and about the other songs that had been forwarded to him from various sources. "The latest song I got was Splash Free," said Makoto, "It was written for a group but Shinji thinks it can be modified so that it won't sound totally terrible sung solo."

"Well don't just waste time recording things for the sake of recording," said Shiori, "The cost of the studio time is being added to your account you know."

"I know," replied Makoto with a smile, he was back up to his eyeballs in debt again. Not that it could be helped but it did depress Makoto to think how true the old saying of "you must spend money to make money was".

Rin was paying close attention to Makoto and Shiori's conversation as Makoto wasn't one to talk about himself and generally didn't volunteer information about his work unless, like the merman thing, he had to. Rin generally had to ask and even then Makoto didn't elaborate as much as Rin would like. So it was all new and interesting to Rin. Still, Rin didn't fail to notice that Toko's mood was getting darker and darker at the conversation between Makoto and Shiori went on. But then again, he was thoroughly ignored, so Rin figured it was just that and put it out of his mind.

They arrived at the movie set and Shiroi took them to the casting manager to sort out paperworks, especially for Rin who quickly got cast as one of the random village thugs who would get killed of in the very scene they are introduced. Rin was a little annoyed at how quickly he got cast as a thug and whispered to Makoto, "It's the teeth isn't it?"

Makoto smiled and replied, "Nay, its your muscles. With a body like that you can't exactly pass for a farmer."

"You're always so positive," mused Rin, "Just be my boyfriend already," wait, did he just say that out loud!

Rin started to blush, to get nervous, to say something more but, Makoto laughed, "I am not that positive," he replied, "Plus your criteria for a boyfriend should really include more things than 'is positive'."

Of course Makoto thought he was joking, Rin started to feel unreasonably irritated but what was he expecting given where they were and how casually his tongue slipped out words he's often been thinking. He sighed, "Being positive is an important quality," he said simply, "I mean, I can be pretty gloomy and negative so really, I should totally be with someone positive."

"Good point," agreed Makoto. Further conversation was halted when they were met by an assistant producer, who despite their fancy sounding titles were basically the odd-jobbers of the set, with continuity sheets and instructions as to where to go and what to do.

"I am sure you have all heard bad things about the production, well I am here to let you know its all lies!" said the young girl, told not only Makoto, Rin and Toko but a few other people who were extras and bit part actors, "It's just that the director demands heart! We have a script, a perfectly good script but he's okay with you going off script! He wants you to really get into the characters head and be the character!"

"He wants us to improvise?" asked Toko.

"No, well yes, I mean, don't just make random stuff-up!" she told them, "Be… the characters."

"She's full of shit," Rin concluded but didn't voice his thoughts aloud. But he was beginning to think why everybody considered this a waste of time and a movie that wasn't going to go any where.

Still, Rin was determined to play nice, if only for Makoto's sake. As for Makoto, he had a serious look on his face as he studied his continuity sheet carefully and the backgrounds of the characters they were supposed to be playing. For Rin, the background information consisted of two lines "Local thug, born and grew-up in village. In justified conflict with new samurai lord."

"Justified conflict was better than unjustified conflict so that was something," thought Rin. Rin didn't have any dialogues for the two scenes he was going to be in. In one scene he and the other thugs were in a tavern drinking-up and listening to their leader mouth-off against the new samurai lord. Next scene happens after they leave the tavern when they are accosted by some of the samurai lord's retainers for mouthing off against their lord, a fight ensures. Fist vs swords and of course swords win. Done dusted and Rin's 20,000 Yen richer.

Rin just had to make sure his fist didn't actually connect with anyone. There was an art to stage fighting and that's why before costume and makeup, he had to attend a crash course in fight choreography. Makoto would also be getting instruction on fight choreography but since he was fighting with swords, he would be in a different group to Rin. So they separated and didn't meet back-up until well after lunch.

By the time they did, they were both in full costume and makeup. "You look hot!" said Rin honestly, "Don't tell me, the Tachibana family used to be samurai."

Makoto laughed sheepishly and changed the subject, "You look great too," and Rin did, especially when he smirked. Rin was wearing a stylised grey hakama that left his arms bare, showing off his impressive muscles. They had tied his hair up into a ponytail and gave him a cross shaped scar that reminded Makoto of Kenshin from Rurouni Kenshin. The overall effect wasn't really a thug who looked like a no goodnick but a cool guy who didn't live by society's rules.

Makoto supposed that's what they were going for as the hero of the film was the thug leader and Rin was going to be in the pivotal scene when the leader, played by an up and coming young actor, goes from direction less agitating to focused rebellion. The change is prompted by the death of his men, of whom Rin was going to be one, at the hands of a samurai retainers, of whom Makoto was one. So even though Makoto was the samurai and Rin was the thug, it was Makoto who was the villains of the film or so Makoto gathered.

Makoto himself was dressed in an all black hakama with gold embroidered lettering. With his height and build, Makoto couldn't help but cut a dashing figure. Especially since Makoto had perfect posture and carried his sword like he was born with it. Rin mentally resigned himself to Makoto getting even more fangirls, assuming this movie ever saw the light of day that is.

"Okay, thugs and samurai report to set 43 for scene 115!" said the assistant producer from before.

That was the scene outside the tavern when Rin gets killed off. They were going to shoot scene 115 before scene 113, which was inside the tavern. Everybody had strict instructions not to get injured as that would mess with continuity. They were joined by Toko on their way to the set, he too was a samurai.

"Try not to hog the spotlight again, Tachibana," Toko taunted, "We don't want a repeat of the angel and devils show."

Rin found himself glaring at Toko but Makoto just smiled good naturedly and said simply, "Good luck to you too Toko-senpai."

Toko gave Makoto a look of loathing before moving on. "What the hell Makoto!"

Makoto laughed, "I have been very lucky," said Makoto softly, "Even when I mess-up, like during the devil and angel show, I manage to avoid consequences. So, its only natural that some of my senpais who have been in the industry for years would be upset," Makoto was all sincerity, "Plus Shiori-san seems to work extra hard for me."

"Makoto, you didn't do anything wrong in that show," Rin pointed out, "You did you job and you did your job well. It wasn't your fault how things went down."

"Still, I shouldn't have drawn that much attention to myself," replied Makoto.

Rin reached out and flicked Makoto's ears, "Ouch! What was that for?"

"For you being an idiot," replied Rin, "Do you ever listen to yourself, Makoto? You are in an industry where you are supposed to standout. You not standing out is like me not swimming fast because I might hurt my senpais feelings!" scoffed Rin.

"You have a point," agreed Makoto, "But of course it's not that simple. I can't just stand out for the sake of standing out and I can't stand out in a way that's bad for the job. Besides, I have been very lucky and luck is a big factor in this industry. At least that's what I found."

That Rin couldn't argue with. But it was the first time it occurred to Rin that Makoto had been keeping a lot to himself. Did Makoto too have issues with the other 'talents' at his agency that were similar to what Rin had been experiencing in the locker rooms? Is that why Makoto had no social life outside of Rin? But then again, Makoto wasn't really the 'hitting the town' type of person. Still, surely mingling was part of his job description. Rin decided he needed to pay closer attention to Makoto. Because the last thing he wanted, was for their relationship to deteriorate into a one-sided affair where Makoto did all the supporting and Rin all the clinging. No, what Rin wanted was a situation where they could both lift each other up, while pursuing their own individual hopes and dreams.

* * *

The director must have be very good because Makoto just couldn't see how someone this… plain spoken could keep working in Japan. "Like I told the previous set of so called actors," he was saying, "I want you to be the characters and react naturally. That's why I had the script writer concentrate one coming-up with backgrounds," Well Makoto did have a lot of information on his character. "So show me what you got! Places!"

Makoto scrambled to fall in line with the other samurai retainers who were going to be following their leader, one of the supporting actors, down the path to about the middle of the set, where they would face the group of thugs, including their leader, the star of the movie and an argument would ensure and a fight would break out.

"And action," declared the director and that was his job done. Now it was all upto the actors and the stage manager.

Makoto started walking with due determination… but no, that wasn't right. Why would he be determine to go confront a group of unarmed "thugs" when they weren't thugs so much as people who opposed the eccentricities of the new samurai lord. Surely his character, someone who lived and grew-up in this village would be reluctant. Especially since the new samurai lord was… crazy. It wasn't that he set high taxes and cracked down on the villagers when they couldn't pay. No, economically, he was great.

However, he was a pervert who took to bed anyone and anything that caught his fancy. Who ordered his random shops ransacked and burnt because of such petty reasons like the tea wasn't good enough. Not to mention farms torn down, fields of crops ploughed into the ground because he didn't like the look of the rice etc, etc. The economics stayed fine because his dutiful wife, the one the current Samurai lord had married to gain control of these lands, made sure shopkeepers, farmers and whoever else were compensated. But there was no compensation for dignity.

Surely the Samurai retainer that Makoto was playing would understand that. Would he really be okay to just follow his leader, a leader who had come with his new lord and thus had no connection to the local land. Would an honorable samurai really just go along with the flow? That didn't really make sense right?

Makoto was still thinking these things when the scene moved on and the fight started. All the samurai joined the melee, except for Makoto. Who stood there frozen. Until one of the leader of the samurai retainers went to deliver the first killing blow. Makoto just moved found a way to wedge his still sheathed sword between the unarmed thug and the samurai, who turned out to be Toko.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?" Toko demanded.

"I…" well the director hadn't called cut yet so Makoto decided to just reply in character, "This isn't honorable. They are unarmed!"

Toko just looked confused but the leader of the thugs and the samurai retainer were veteran actors who too noticed that the director hadn't called cut despite the unexpected development. So they ran with it. The thug leader, who as on the ground, rolled away from the samurai retainer leader and gaining his feet, glared back at the leader and bite out, "That's right! You call yourself samurai? What kind of samurai attacks unarmed folk!"

"The kind that knows how to honour their master," replied the leader as he turned on Makoto, "You are the one without honour!"

"I don't agree," replied Makoto, "I mean, look at us! We are grappling in the streets like a bunch of thugs! With…" well they were samurai and they wouldn't think very highly of non-samurai, "With a bunch of thugs! Sullying our swords like this. This is the height of dishonour!"

The leader of the retainers smirked, he was supposed to be a sadist, "Fine, we'll do it your way," he told Makoto.

"My… my way," shuttered Makoto.

"You have a problem with our lord," the retainer leader said, "Then come with me peacefully. I'll take you to him and you can tell him your grievances in person!"

"It's a trap!" Rin cried because, well why the hell not!

"It's not," the retainer leader assured everybody, "I will guarantee that no samurai will sully their blades with your blood! In fact, there will be no blood shed. Not the single drop…"

"Cut!" the director cried, and turning to the haggard looking screenwriter ordered, "You saw what happened. Redo scene 120. Instead of the samurai lord just finding out about the brawl, he gets to hear the grievances and the promise made and then orders the thugs buried alive or some other cruel death that won't result in bloodshed."

The screenwriter nodded and asked, "What about the samurai who spoke out of turn?" he said looking at Makoto, "He would be punished too."

"No, not yet," said the director, "At least not in scene 120. The lord is eccentric. Let's make him be eccentric and then have him die a gruesome bloody death that will leave the audience angry with us for killing the only samurai who seems to have any honour. It'll be brilliant!"

Makoto gulped. Why did he have to improvise? Because it was beginning to sound as if he was getting a bigger role in this movie. Other people seemed to also come to that conclusion because the assistant producer from before was whispering frantically to the director.

"Well make sure we get to keep him for more then the next three days!" the director yelled at the poor assistant producer, "I mean, all I have been getting are brainless sheeps! First sign of a brain and you are telling me I only have him until thursday! Well no! I don't agree! Go find his bloody manager and make sure I get to keep him until I am satisfied! Now go and make it happen or you're fired!"

The poor assistant producer ran towards the room Makoto knew Shiori was using as an onsite office with some of the other managers as the director order the scene to be retaken because not everybody had been able to adjust quickly enough.

As the actors pulled each other up and dusted each other off, which make-up artists rushing in to apply touch-ups, Rin found himself close enough to Makoto and Toko to overhear the seething Toko say to Makoto, "Fuck you Tachibana, fuck you to hell! I hope Shinji gets you addicted to something nasty!" before stalking off. Makoto just sighed and turned his mind to the job at hand.

Rin on the other hand was torn between telling Toko off, marvelling at Makoto's professionalism and wondering if he should be concerned about Shinji. Afterall, Rin knew Makoto and Shinji were working closely and Shinji was being something of a mentor to Makoto. Could Shinji really get Makoto addicted to something nasty? Surely Makoto wouldn't ever taking drugs. Even just out of curiosity. But then Rin remembered Kuza. Surely Kuza never set out to take performance enhancing drugs. Surely Kuza had wanted to achieve his dreams on his own power, with hard work and playing within the rules. Then something happened and he turned to performance enhancing drugs. What was the saying, drop by drop a water pot is filled and so little by little we can all turn to things we never thought would touch us. So even Makoto could fall into darkness if he was not careful...

* * *

The car ride back also consisted of Shiori and Makoto talking only of Makoto's schedule, "I can arrange the recording sessions to fit around the movie shoots," said Shiori, "But you'll have to be super organised not to fall sick and be on top of your homework. I mean, you don't want to drop out of high school right."

"I would set a bad example for Ren and Ran," said Makoto, "Plus I like school."

"Well then get ready to not sleep much," said Shiori, "And eat ready made meals because I don't see you having enough time to cook."

"Don't worry," Rin pipped in, "I'll feed him proper food!"

"You are such a nice not-boyfriend," said Shiori, "Because you know…"

"Yeah, yeah, Makoto can't date so that fangirl hearts remain intact," said Rin, by now knowing where the conversation was headed. Makoto just buried his face in his hands, why must he be teased to mercilessly?

* * *

After Shiori dropped them off at home, Makoto went to bathe first while Rin got dinner started. When Makoto got out, he found Rin staring at Haru's drawings of the aquarium filled home that had been inspired by Makoto and Haru's stay at the Underwater hotel in Dubai. Makoto had made frames out of cardboards for them. Nothing too fancy, just a cardboard for the backing and a cardboard with an appropriate size hole cutout to frame the picture, with everything stuck together with glue.

Makoto smiled as he said, "Bath's free!"

"Makoto," Rin started, his back to Makoto, still facing the pictures, "There are two things I would really like you to promise me."

"Sure thing," Makoto said readily.

Rin turned around a bit annoyed, "Don't just agree without hearing what I want first!"

"Well if its important enough for you to ask, I am sure I won't say no," countered Makoto.

Rin sighed and just decided to press on, "Firstly, I don't ever want you to…" there really was no better word so Rin just went with the word that had first occurred to him, "Prostitute yourself for me."

"Huh!"

"I mean," he gestured towards Haru's drawing, "Don't take extra jobs or do favours for people to get something for me. Whatever it is, I don't want it if it means you have to…" this was difficult to explain, "Do something… more..." he finished lamely.

Makoto blinked a bit. He got what Rin was saying but he wasn't entirely sure about Rin's choice of words. But he decided to not get hung-up on semantics. "But I like," Makoto started.

"No."

"But…"

"No!"

Makoto sighed, "Fine! But I did really want to see Rin swim in a pool full of cherry blossoms," he said with a pout.

Rin visibly started, "What…"

"Ah well, movie magic," Makoto said with a grin.

"Fuck Makoto! Don't tell me you took on that movie job to get me in a pool full of cherry blossoms because I once made an idle comment about how I wanted to do that?" asked Rin.

"No!" said Makoto, "I was… look don't worry about it. I wasn't going to do something extra."

"Makoto…"

"Seriously! Don't worry about it!"

Rin glared. Makoto sighed and decided to attempt to deflect the subject, "And the other thing?" he prompted..

This bit was even harder. Rin took a deep breath and said, "I am not Haru."

"No you are Rin," Makoto teased.

Rin choose to ignore him and go on, "I don't know you inside out and conversely, you can't read my mind. So, so let's promise to… to always be honest and speak our mind when… when we are here. In this apartment," Makoto blinked, Rin decided to speak on, even if he was rambling, "I mean, its not like I don't hide things. Gou would say I am never honest about my feelings and I wouldn't exactly disagree with her. Look what a mess of things I made last year!" he pointed out, "But I want to…" he trailed off, "I am scared of being honest with my feelings and I am sure you have reasons to never talk about yourself. Especially when you are troubled. But if you don't share, I won't be able to tell. Just like if I don't share my feeling, you won't know what's going on in my head. Because I am not…" Rin sighed, "Haru. So… so let's be honest with each other when we are alone, here in this six tatami apartment," Rin looked at Makoto expectantly.

Makoto was silent for awhile but then he smiled and said, "Sure, I promise."

"Great," said Rin with a smile, but then his face hardened, "You can start by telling me what you have been planning with the whole cherry blossom thing!"

"What's for dinner, I am starving!" Makoto said as he headed for the kitchen.

"Makoto!"

* * *

Tuesday saw Makoto start juggling movies shoots, recording session, merman training, any modelling photo shoots and not to mention his school work. While Rin started his routine for the rest of his suspension - training on his own at the aquatic centre, studying to get ahead of his school work and thinking of what else he wanted to do besides swimming.

It was a strange week. Sometimes the time passed quickly, other times the time just dragged. It kind of reminded Rin of the long nights in his dorm the summer before when he would just be lying in his bunk waiting for the sun to rise, remembering in vivid details the winter of their last year of elementary school. It wasn't always pleasant and by the time Friday rolled around, Rin was more than ready to start training again.

Friday morning Makoto handed Rin a pass for the aquarium for when his merman video and photo shoot was going to happen. "Come see me if you can," he told him before rushing out the door, having inhaled his breakfast.

Rin sighed, as much as he enjoying training Makoto to be a merman, Rin was glad that after today the merman training would not be necessary and Makoto would have one less thing to juggle and worry about.

He spent the day per normal. At first he thought to go straight to the aquarium from the aquatic center but then decided to come home, strange to think of Makoto's apartment as home, first and cook. Rin figured by the time Makoto got back, it would be late and they would probably end-up getting take-out or convenience store food if nothing was cooked and waiting. Rin was half tempted to break his no seafood rule but decided to go with good ol' lamb instead.

Unfortunately, he miscalculated and by the time he was done, he was running seriously late. Indeed, Makoto's shoot would have well and truly started by the time he got there. Nevermind, Makoto was likely to be there for a few hours. So it was all good.

Just as he put the keys in his pocket, there was a knock on the door. "Oh what now!" he thought, not expecting anyone, he opened the door without thinking and was confronted with, "Haru!"

* * *

Makoto wondered where Rin was but figured that either Rin was running late or decided not to come. Right about now Makoto wished he had decided not to come too because those sharks looked really scary.

"They are just reef sharks," one of the aquarium employees who was attending to the shoot told him, "Besides all sharks have a bad rap. Unless you provoke them, they are unlikely to hurt you."

"I'll do my best to keep out of their way," said Makoto with a smile.

"Also try not to damage the corals," the attendant told him, "I understand the director wants you to swim very close to the corals."

"Through that hoop like shape the corals have made," Makoto said pointing to a structure about 10 meters from the edge of the tank.

The attendant did not look pleased but only said, "Watch your tail." Makoto nodded.

He was given the order to dive in, taking a deep breath Makoto did. He swam about a bit, like he and Rin and been practicing. Gliding through the coral loop and even managing a full body twist. He surfaced about ten minutes later to murmurs of astonishment and praise. The observers were really impressed with his movements. Makoto was once again glad that Rin was a such a technical genius when it came to all things swimming.

Makoto was told to dive again and this time hold certain poses. To aid in that, he would use weights to keep himself weighted down and steady. It was a little unnerving but Makoto managed somehow. They then mixed it up and had him swimming around a bit for some video shots. Then they set up another set of photoshoots with the weights, as Makoto had a little break.

"You are doing great," said one of the production assistants, "You really swim like a merman."

"Thanks, I had help from a great trainer," replied Makoto.

"We are ready for you," said another assistant.

"Right," and Makoto dived-in and got in position.

"Get the glow sticks ready and cut the lights," said the second assistant.

"Oh shit!" cried the first assistant, "I forgot to tell him we were going to do that!"

Makoto wasn't sure what was happening but just as he had hooked himself into the weights that were sitting at the bottom of the shark tank, everything went dark. Makoto full on panicked and started to fumble with the weight, trying to get himself free. Confused and panic, Makoto wasn't controlling his breath properly exhaling too quickly.

"Haru!" he found himself mentally calling, "Haru!" the name was like a mantra and it calmed him enough to somehow undo the weights. He headed for the surface but it was too dark and he ran into something. Something soft… no! A shark! Did he just provoke a shark? He tried to swim away but then his tail bumped into something and was snagged!

"Haru!" Makoto was now screaming in his head as panic totally and utterly gripped him, "Haru!" and suddenly Haru was there. Haru was there!

Makoto didn't know how or why but Haru was there, holding something that illuminated the darkness around him, around them. Haru touched his face and that was all it took to start calm Makoto down. Makoto was still out of breath but Haru seemed to know that. Without hesitation, Haru sealed his lips around Makoto's and shared some of his breath with him. There was another calming touch before Haru let go of Makoto and dived down to unsnag his tail from the coral, freeing him and they headed to the surface together...

* * *

**Author's notes:** Sorry about the longish wait between this chapter and the last. RL got in the way :( Anyway, hopefully people are still reading this and finding it not boring! Thanks in advance for any reviews, comments or kudos!


	21. Chapter 21

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

"Haru!" cried Rin, stunned to see his friend and rival here in Tokyo, standing in front of him, wasn't he supposed to be in Iwatobi?

"Rin!" Haru was equally surprised, what was Rin doing here on friday evening? Didn't Rin and Makoto meet-up during weekends only? Being a straightforward person, Haru simply asked, "What are you doing here?"

"I am staying here for the time being," said Rin, after taking a deep breath to calm himself.

"Why?" demanded Haru.

"Does it matter?" asked Rin irritated, "What are you doing here?"

Haru glared at him and roughly pushed him aside to enter the apartment and drop his bag. That was when Rin noticed Haru had a rather large and heavy looking bag and clearly looked like he was here for a long stay. Rin's heart dropped. It was over, his time with Makoto was over because when Haru was around, everybody paled into insignificance and Makoto only had eyes for Haru.

"Where's Makoto?" demanded Haru.

"He's at his photoshoot at the aquarium," said Rin, "You know the merman shoot."

"Merman shoot?" wondered Haru.

"Ah… didn't he tell you?" asked Rin surprised.

"No…" Haru felt panic rise within him, just how dangerous was his photoshoot. Suddenly he was running out the door.

"Haru!" Rin called, confused and a bit annoyed. Really, Haru could be such a handful. He barely remembered to lock the door behind him as he chased after Haru.

He didn't have to run too far however, as reason dawned on Haru soon and he stopped to wait for Rin. Tokyo afterall had four aquariums with two others located in nearby Yokohama and Enoshima respectively. Plus he probably would need some sort of special credentials to get in to see Makoto and he needed to see Makoto. See his smile, he just had to.

* * *

Makoto's shoot was in Sunshine Aquarium in Ikebukuro, which was some distance away. The train ride there was a frigid affair. Rin had forgotten what it was like to be on the wrong side of Haru. It's was the same as when he first ran him to Haru and the others back in the old swim club. It was more what it had been like when they were in the sixth grade and Haru had been utterly unsociable with him. Haru had changed since then and he no longer treated other people as coldly or brashly, letting some of the warmth that had always been inside seep out. But right now, right now Haru was back to the cold child who was trying to drive Rin away before Rin even made any attempts to get close. Rin didn't really want to deal with that Haru again.

For his part, Haru was just mad at Makoto. He was angry that none of the texts Makoto sent him recently mention Rin was staying with him for longer than a night. He was angry that Makoto hadn't mentioned this merman shoot. Actually, now that he thought about it, Makoto hadn't chatted with him for long in the last week or so. Haru now guessed it was because Rin was around and Makoto didn't feel right being on chat with Haru for too long with Rin hovering about. Haru had simply assumed Makoto had been busy and was tired.

As the train ride went on, Haru started to calm down and reason started to rear its head. Makoto must not have mentioned Rin was staying with him because Haru's response to the statement "hey, Rin is staying with me" would have been "why?" and Haru guessed Makoto did not want to share the "why" with Haru. Probably it was something personal for Rin and so Makoto felt uncomfortable sharing it.

As for the merman thing… Haru didn't have the faintest clue why Makoto had chosen to keep that from him. Haru suspected some measure of freediving would be involved but given Makoto was at an indoor aquarium, it meant that the open sea was not involved in any way shape or form. So why didn't Makoto just tell him.

Haru tried to think back to his last trip to the Sunshine Aquarium. It had been a few years since his parents had taken him there but it couldn't have changed that much. Come of think of it. Weren't most of the tanks at the Sunshine Aquarium small window type tanks that only had a few select variety of fish. Indeed the only really large tanks at the Aquarium were the shark tanks… No!

Haru was so agitated that he couldn't sit still. He started fidgeting, he stood-up but then sat down again. Why was this train not moving faster! "What the hell is wrong with you?" demanded Rin, losing patience.

Haru glared at him, "Did you know Makoto was swimming in a shark tank?"

"Huh?" Rin was surprised.

"I have been to all the aquariums in Tokyo," replied Haru, Rin wouldn't be surprised if Haru had been to every aquarium in Japan at least once, "The only tanks big enough for Makoto to swim in at the Sunshine Aquarium are the shark tanks!"

Now Rin looked worried, "I didn't know," he confessed, "He didn't tell me, damn it!" Didn't they just promised to be honest with each other.

Although Rin was sure in Makoto's mind it was all in keeping with his promise to Rin or maybe since Makoto had already shared what he wanted to about the shoot with Rin before the promise, he didn't feel like offering-up additional details after the promise was made. Rin tried to think back to what Makoto had said about the shoot but couldn't recall sharks being mentioned. He just mentioned that he would be in a tank with an artificial reef because that was the prettiest setting. Rin had never visited any of the aquariums in Tokyo and so even if he wasn't stressed and pre-occupied with his own crap, he wouldn't have been able to pick-up on the fact that the reef tank Makoto mentioned contained sharks. Given how little information Haru needed to deduce that Makoto was swimming in a shark tank was a good indication that Haru would have known and so Makoto had simply omitted the whole shoot.

He had also not mentioned Rin's prolonged stay but Rin could guess why Makoto hadn't. "I got suspended from the swim program," Rin blurted out, he was sick of secrets. Haru's eyes widened in surprised as Rin pressed on, "I punched a teammate for… dredging up some painful things from Australia," Rin was not going to get into Anne and he knew Haru wouldn't dig or simply assume it was swimming related, "Makoto kindly offered to let me stay with him as things would be awkward for me at the dorm and because at first it was looking like I would be kicked off the program entirely. But," Rin explained, "When the guy I punched was taken to the hospital, they found out he was a drug cheat. So they are letting me off the hook with a week suspension and a warning because they just want to bury the story now."

"Oh," so that explained why the program management wanted him to come to tryout again out of the blue, thought Haru, "The program coordinators contacted me last week and told me to come for a time trial for today," Haru explained, "I didn't tell Makoto because I wanted to surprise him. I guess a number of swimmers are going to be kicked-out, suspended or otherwise dropped from the team and they are shot swimmers."

Rin was surprised, "You passed," it was not a question. Haru didn't bother answering. Well it was well and truly over now, Rin's time with Makoto that is, "I supposed you are going to stay with Makoto."

"I wanted to," admitted Haru, "But they said they aren't approving off-site accommodation for new swimmers. I have to report to the dorm sunday night, ahead of practice starting monday."

"Oh," as all Rin said. He himself was planning to return to the dorms on sunday. But he supposed Haru would prefer Rin return sooner rather then later. Rin sighed. Haru's only got here and he was already feeling like an unwanted third wheel. The rest of the trip was spent in somewhat uncomfortable silence.

* * *

Showing the pass that Makoto had left for Rin got them escorted to the viewing area of the shark tank. But they seemed to have arrived at a lull point in the shooting because while there were plenty of sharks, there was no Makoto to be seen in the tank. There were few of production crew members on laptops checking shots and videos as they were relayed from the camera's inside the tanks but nothing more.

Haru guessed correctly that the bulk of the action and Makoto, was in the area above the tanks. So, in typical Haruka fashion he simply located the nearest "employees only" door that had been jammed open so the production crew could enter and exit freely and simply walked in. "Haru!" Rin called, "You can't…"

"I want to see Makoto," Haru replied simply but determinedly.

For a moment Rin had an insight into what Haru must have been like as a toddler. He could just imagine Haru throwing tantrums until his favourite plaything was returned to him. Rin bet Makoto as a sweet child who just let Haru do whatever he wanted to him. Rin sighed and followed.

They got to the tank opening to find a scene of frantic activity. Couple of assistants had a pile of what looked like glow sticks near them and a few in each hand, it looked like they were going to throw them into the tank. Just as Rin had deduced this much, he heard someone say, "Get the glow sticks ready and cut the lights."

"Oh shit!" cried some else, "I forgot to tell him we were going to do that!"

Before Rin had time to even process what he just heard the room went dark save for the glow sticks and some emergency lights too faint to illuminate much. Rin was disorientated and blinked rapidly to adjust to the reduced illumination. Next to him he heard the chink of Haru's belt buckle hit the floor. He turned just in time to see Haru take-off in a run, pausing only to grab a glow stick before diving in.

"Turn the lights on!" someone screamed. But the lights didn't seem to come on as fast as they went off.

By the time they did, Haru had already brought Makoto to the surface. A pale scared Makoto who had Haru's hand in a vice grip, "Haru," he kept repeating, "Haru," like a mantra. Haru said nothing. Simply held on to Makoto's hand.

Rin got to the tank edge bodily pulled Makoto out, "The fuck Makoto," he was trying very hard not to yell, "You never told me you were going to be in a shark tank!" He helped Makoto settle on the floor since Makoto's legs were useless inside the fin and tail.

Makoto was breathing hard but was calming down. He finally settled when Haru climbed out of the tank and sat down next to him, "Sorry," he said forcing a grin, "Didn't want to worry you."

Haru didn't say a word but he didn't have to. Makoto didn't need words to understand Haru. "I am sorry Haru," he said sincerely, "I knew you would remember that the only reef display big enough for me to swim in was in the reef shark tank reef. So I didn't mention it. I didn't want you to worry either. Especially since I thought you would be in Iwatobi."

"You can thank Rin's hot temper," Haru said dryly after a moment. Makoto got it was meant to be a joke but he didn't really get it. Rin seemed to though and was glaring at Haru.

About then the assistant who had forgotten to tell Makoto what they were planning ran to him and started apologising. Makoto, predictably, just smiled and trying to reassure and calm her. It was not their place to say something. So both Haru and Rin held their tongue. But the look on their face was told a wholly different story.

"Are you alright?" asked the production director, coming-up to Makoto, "Was the tail damaged? Can you go again? We still need more shots."

Rin was about ready to punch someone because Makoto still looked so very pale. "Makoto," whispered Haru.

Makoto just turned and smiled at Haru, "It's fine, Haru," he said, "I am okay now. Especially since you are here," turning back to the director he replied, "I am fine and can go again but I haven't check the tail yet."

The tail was dutifully checked by the prop department. It was damaged but nothing that would mar the photos or video in a way that couldn't be corrected in post-production. After a short recovery, Makoto was made to dive again but in a small blessing, they had to abandon the glow sticks thing they were trying. Not because of Makoto but because no one had cleared it with aquarium staff and when they realised they were planning on toss glow sticks into the shark tank, they put their foot down.

"They don't care," it suddenly hit Rin, "Maybe if Makoto was a bigger star who couldn't be easily replaced or whose name carried weight, it would be different. But then again, I am the same. We both need to make it big before we are more than replaceable cogs," but even then, they were only irreplaceable while they were at their peak. Past their peaks... Rin shrugged the thought off. It was too early to be thinking of past their peak. What they needed to do now was to make sure their peaks were so lofty and high that people had to crane their heads really back to see it.

* * *

"Ah! I wish you could stay with me!" said Makoto, they were back at his apartment and having a very late meal since the shoot hadn't finished until 9 and even though Makoto had been offered and accepted a taxi by the production management, they still hadn't gotten in until very close to 10 PM. Rin was very glad he had cooked before leaving, if only because Makoto seemed to be really enjoying the food, "I wish you could both stay with me," he said.

"I didn't realise you enjoyed my cooking so much," Rin joked.

"Well I do love your cooking but that's not all," protested Makoto, "I like your company more than your cooking and your cooking is great!" he said. Rin blushed and couldn't help but chance a glance at Haru.

Haru wasn't really paying attention to the conversation. He was alternating between staring at his food and look at the wall where his sketches hung. He didn't say anything but Makoto smiled as he followed his gaze and said, "Tomorrow we'll go shopping for mackerels. I have some time before I have to go to the movie set and thanks for the sketches Haru-chan, they really help me."

Haru was surprised, "Help you, how?"

"They always fill me with energy and help me focus when I am feeling exhausted, homesick and stuff like that," Makoto answered readily. Haru smiled, Rin lost his appetite.

"I'll return to the dorm tomorrow," he said suddenly.

"Huh, why?" wondered Makoto.

"Your place is too small for all three of us, plus you only have two futons," Rin pointed out, suddenly wondering what the sleeping arrangement tonight was going to be.

"That's not a problem," replied Makoto, "Haru and I have shared futons before. We'll do that tonight and tomorrow we'll buy another futon while getting mackerels and anything else Haru needs," he said, "So you know, if you guys both decide to sleepover from time to time, I'll have enough bedding."

"Or we can just keep sharing," suggest Haru deadpan.

"Ah, won't you be uncomfortable?" wondered Makoto, "I mean, I sleep on my back and kind of take-up a lot of space."

"Doesn't bother me," said Haru.

"Okay then," said Makoto with a bright smile, "We'll share."

"Maybe I should return tonight or at least find a hotel and let you two have the room to 'catch-up'," suggested Rin, in a grouchy put-off tone.

"Huh?" Makoto was confused, "You mean catch-up on news or just talk more about how we have been keeping?" he asked innocently, "I don't think we'll be talking much. I mean, I am beat and Haru's probably tired from the time trials and everything else. I am pretty sure I am just going to be sleeping like a log."

Both Rin and Haru shot Makoto a look, "What?" wondered Makoto confused.

They gave-up and changed the subject, "Why don't you have mackerel?" wondered Haru.

"I am not going to cook fucking mackerel!" declared Rin, "I mean, forget mackerel, even tuna makes him sad!" said Rin, point towards Makoto.

Makoto smiled sheepishly. But Haru smiled brightly and said, "You missed me," it was obvious, something Haru wouldn't normally waste words saying but it refused to stay in, Makoto just smiled in reply, "Well I am here now, so we'll have mackerels everyday."

"Well maybe not everyday," said Makoto a little nervously, "Variety is good and Rin cooks delicious lamb."

"Who said I would be cooking again?" wondered Rin feeling unreasonably annoyed.

"Eh, but I would miss Rin's cooking," said Makoto simply, looking a bit sad. Haru kept poking at his food and frowning before resuming eating.

Rin gave-up, it was hopeless. He was hopelessly in love with Makoto and that was all there was to it. But, Rin realised, Haru wasn't hope less. In fact, it was the opposite. Haru was so confident in his bond with Makoto that Rin, or more accurately, Makoto's behaviour towards Rin didn't even register.

Further musing on Rin's part and all their meal was interrupted when someone banged loudly on the door, "Open-up Tachibana," came a voice neither Rin nor Haru recognised, but Makoto certainly did.

* * *

**Author's note:** sorry about the lame chapter.


	22. Chapter 22

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

"Open-up Tachibana," came a voice as someone banged on the door.

"Who the hell…" started Rin.

"Did you forget to pay rent?" wondered Haru stoically but Makoto smiled, knowing Haru was joking since Haru knew better than anyone that Makoto was too responsible to forget rent.

"It's Shinji-san," explained Makoto was he got up and opened the door, "Shinji-san is everything alright?" Makoto asked, "It's late."

"Is it?" wondered Shinji, somewhat glassy eyed and looking slightly out of it. Shinji looked around and noted the deep dark, "Ah nevermind that, I have been busy writing and you got to hear my new song!" with that he made a motion to enter. Makoto let him, if only because he could tell Shinji wasn't about to leave without an argument.

"Can't this wait until…" Makoto was about to say tomorrow but suddenly realised he hadn't seen Shinji all week and wouldn't see him until later next week.

Makoto was grateful for his increased role in the movie, if only because of the money. He wasn't getting paid for music recording sessions per say. He had a small stipend to cover living expense under the music recording contract but that's about it. At least his modelling jobs, while few, because Shiori insisted on not diluting his brand with catalogue jobs or magazines that were deemed not important enough, were now both high profile and relatively highly paid. However, the increased role meant he had less time with Shinji and had to rely on him more and more to come-up with the songs. Though Makoto himself had been working on a song that he had tentatively titled Ever Blue.

"It can't wait," said Shinji, noting and ignoring Haru and Rin, "Inspiration has a time limit you know," Shinji looked at the food, braised lamb and fragrant jasmine rice with sauteed vegetable, all courtesy of Rin. "Do you have any cookies?" he wondered, "I am kind of hungry."

"Cookies?" wondered Makoto, "I don't really have snacks except for the dried fruit and nut bars," it was a conscious decision since Makoto knew he was fully capable of living on junk food and thus doing serious damage to both his health and body and he actually had a weight clause in his contract that included fat to muscle ratio.

"That'll do," said Shinji cheerfully, "Anyway, so there I was…" he started a story about how he was in a huge slump and totally going nowhere with new songs and being grateful for the break in recording. "But of course Shiori is a bitch who just doesn't understand the creative process but fortunately I have been in this business long enough to know how to get around a writers block or maybe it should be a composers block," Shinji started laughing at his own joke.

"Dude are you high?" wondered Rin. As Makoto looked disturbed. Haru still wore his usual expression but Makoto knew Haru didn't like the situation.

Shinji ignored Rin's question, "Anyway, I think I have the perfect song! I am calling it 'Walking on' or maybe 'Forward' or something like!" and proceeded to sing… if what Shinji was doing could be considered singing. It just sounded like someone was strangling a cat to Rin and Haru.

"It's good!" protested Makoto, addressing Haru, who was giving him a look, "I mean, maybe the melody is a bit off and maybe the name could be shortened to just 'Walk' but the lyrics are solid."

"What lyrics?" demanded Rin, "All I heard was screeching!"

"Ah well, let me try," and with that Makoto started singing. Rin had never heard Makoto sing. It was amazing! Especially since Makoto rendered that cat strangling into an intelligible and rather awesome rock song.

"Well shit!" cursed Rin, "That was awesome Makoto. I didn't know you could sing like that!"

"I did," said Haru, a little proudly. Makoto smiled at them both.

"Well that's why you sing and I write," said Shinji and brought out from his pocket… a bong?

"O hell no!" said Rin jumping to his feet.

Makoto didn't even bother trying to say something but went straight to physically stopping Shinji by grabbing the hand holding the bong, "Shinji-san no," he used the firm tone he normally only used with his siblings, "I don't want you smoking anything in my house."

Shinji made a disapproving noise, "You are such a freaking saint," managing to make 'saint' sound like the worst thing in the universe, "No wonder all that songs you write are saccharin sweet and fluffy. Like cotton candy. But you know Tachibana," he said, suddenly getting serious, "Cotton candy doesn't fill you up. It's mostly vapid and empty. You'll never get anywhere if that's all you can make. So you know…" he leered.

"I am going to be planting my fist in this moron's face before this is all over, aren't I?" Rin commented to no one in particular. Haru just looked grim.

"Makoto," Haru called, Makoto looked at him for just a moment but a silent conversation took place between them. Rin tried to guess what they said to each other but couldn't begin to fathom what they read in each others eyes.

Makoto turned back to Shinji after a moment and said, "I don't need to do drugs to write… non-fluffy songs," protested Makoto, "And what's wrong with fluff anyway? I don't want to write angst I can't relate to. What do I know about parents who are indifferent or worse or about girlfriends who cheat and… and stuff like that! I'll… I'll write angst from the heart, which is also how I write fluffy stuff."

"Yeah well, that doesn't mean it will be good," countered Shinji.

"No, no it doesn't," agreed Makoto, "But that's besides the point!" he insisted, "Anyway, are we done here?"

"Fine, fine," said Shinji, and headed for the door, then stopped and added as an after though, "Don't tell Shiori. I mean, you wouldn't want me getting fired would you?" before Makoto can answer, "Of your could wouldn't, who is going to write your songs if not me!" with that he left.

There was a long moment of pause as everybody gathered their thoughts together. Rin was the first to break the silence, "You need to get rid of that guy ASAP," in told Makoto.

"Shinji-san is… disturbed but he's…"

"Makoto," Rin interrupted, "Everything that's good about you, is absolutely shithouse when dealing with an addict. You aren't helping that guy but enabling him."

"I am not enabling him!" Makoto protested, "I mean…" his face fell into lines of misery as he reconsidered, "Maybe I am. I don't know anymore. But I know nothing good will come off ratting him out to Shiori-san. All that'll do is putting Shinji-san back on the streets and maybe committing crimes to feed his drug habits. It'll… it'll be bad all around! Because I do need him!"

"No you fucking don't!" declared Rin, "And he knows it too! That's why he's trying to put you down and make you think you need him."

"No that's not right, my songs… are too sweet and only good to be filler material of an album. The tracks that'll be released as singles that stuff, that'll all be what Shinji-san wrote. Even my non-fluffy songs are… not good," explains Makoto.

"I don't believe that for a moment!" said Rin.

"Well you haven't heard my songs!" pointed out Makoto, "Besides, if this is about Shinji-san offering my drugs and making drug related comments, that would happen even if he wasn't there. I mean, he's not the only one to do that and he won't be the only one. Frankly I find…" he paused and glanced at Haru, "Other things more disturbing," he finished lamely.

"What other things?" wondered Rin. Haru for the time being was happy to let Rin do the talking since so far Rin was asking all the questions Haru wanted to ask.

"No… nothing," stammered Makoto.

"Makoto…" said Rin. Makoto averted his gaze.

Haru got-up and stood face to face with Makoto, gently he place his hand on Makoto's shoulder, "Makoto, what other things?" he asked gently.

"People… people keep coming on to!" he declared, comically intensely. Both Rin and Haru couldn't help but snicker. "Don't laugh! It's a serious problem!" said Makoto indignantly, "I mean, its not like I am getting confessed to like in school! I mean there is some of that and turning down those suck as much as it used to in school! But now some people just want to… hook-up or something and it's really uncomfortable when they come on to me really strongly. I mean, one girl started unbuttoning her shirt! Another full on flashed me! Then when I escaped into the men's toilet, one of the guys in there noticed… noticed umm… the state of my pants and offered to help! It was horrible!"

"Well shit," said Rin, "It does sound annoying," admitted Rin, "Although I am glad you are turning them all down. Even the love confessions."

"That's it isn't it," said Makoto, "How can they be in love with me when they don't know anything about me? I mean, I only got one proper love confession and that was from Zaki-chan. Why I accepted it. I don't want a confession based on swallow connections," admitted Makoto.

"I am glad," said Haru with a smile, "Makoto deserves more than that. But you know Makoto, you shouldn't assume your songs aren't good enough. Not until you have sung them for me… for us," Haru rectified, remembering Rin.

Makoto nodded but didn't say anything else. He just felt drained. Perhaps sensing that, Haru suggested, "Let's finish eating and go to bed," to this they all agreed.

* * *

Year of getting-up early for training meant that no matter how exhausted Rin was, his internal body clock would go off at 5:30 AM, just in time for his morning run. Although normally he wasn't greeted with a sight that soured his mood instantly, because just across for him Haru and Makoto were cuddling! Well Haru was cuddling Makoto, Makoto was sleeping on his back like a log and Haru was all over him. Rin was tempted to wake Haru up but didn't.

Instead he started to put his futon away as quietly as he could. But he wasn't quiet enough or rather, didn't realised just how light a sleeper Haru was. Haru carefully got up and asked, "What are you doing?"

"Going for a run," said Rin simply.

"I'll join," said Haru.

"Heh, great! We can race," said Rin, "And I'll show you just how powerful my legs have become."

Haru smirked, "Bring it on!"

By the time Makoto woke-up, both Haru and Rin were gone. Haru left him a text telling him they were going for a run. So Makoto didn't worry and started to get breakfast ready. He was just about done when Rin and Haru returned.

"Tadaima," said Rin, coming in.

Haru didn't like it, "Don't you mean ojama shimasu," he corrected.

Rin glared at Haru. Makoto laughed and replied, "Okaerinasai Haru, Rin," grinning he asked, "Who won?" correctly guessing they had turned their morning run into a match.

"I did," replied Rin proudly.

"But not by much," said Haru, "If you are proud of such small victories, then you have truly become a small man," Rin was livid.

But, "Now, now, let's not have a repeat of the crab festival," said Makoto, smoothly trying to diffuse Rin and Haru's tendency to compete whenever they were near each other, "Besides," he added grinning, "There isn't much for you guys to compete over in my apartment."

"There is food," Rin pointed out and then smirking, "And you!"

"There can be no competition with Makoto, Rin," replied Haru, "Makoto is mine," Haru declared with finality.

Rin narrowed his eyes and would probably have said a few things that none of them were ready to have in the open when Makoto unwittingly interrupted by laughing out loud, "I am glad because having you two compete over me would be too embarrassing!" he said jokingly, "As for food," Makoto thought for a moment, "As long as its not too messy because I absolutely don't have time to clean-up after a food fight!"

Rin let it go, "I am having my shower first," he declared. While in the shower Rin wondered what Makoto meant by his comment but eventually deciding he probably meant nothing in particular by it. More importantly, Rin did NOT want to compete over Makoto. The last thing Rin wanted was reduce Makoto to some sort of prize he and Haru fought over. He liked competing with Haru and probably would compete with him for the rest of his life. Even over stupid stuff like fortunes but Makoto was too important, at least to Rin, for one of their silly competitions.

Rin emerged to find Haru and Makoto fiddling with their phones, "There!" said Makoto, "Now you can see my calendar," Haru nodded, Makoto grinned.

Rin sighed and got Makoto's spare key off his keychains and put it on the table next to Haru, "I supposed you'll want this," he said not looking at anyone.

"Only if you don't want it any more," said Makoto, "I already gave, Haru-chan a key."

Rin blinked, "This apartment had three keys to the front door?"

"Unusual I know," said Makoto, "But the previous tenant was a single mother with two daughters. One in high school and the other in middle, so she needed three keys for all of them."

"This place is a bit small for three people isn't it?" commented Rin as he took the key back, a little too eagerly if the look Haru shot him was any indication.

"I am sure they weren't staying here because they wanted to," replied Makoto, "Not that they were here for long. About a year or so. I met them just as I was moving in," he explained, "They moved down the street to a slightly bigger apartment. The girls at least were excited."

"Are you sure they weren't just excited to see you?" asked Rin. Makoto just laughed.

* * *

Makoto didn't end-up going to the fish market with Haru afterall, realising with the cold light of day that turning-up to a movie set after a visiting a fish market was probably not a good idea. Instead Rin and Haru ended-up going together and ended-up competing over who could haggle the most, who could get the biggest fish for the cheapest (although Haru threw that match when he simply bought the biggest mackerel for as cheap as he could get it, while Rin went for a tuna per kg Rin won by a mile).

They came home and competed over who could cook the most delicious fish dish, to be judged by Makoto once he got home, who could do the dishes fastest and a myriad of other things that only halted when Makoto returned.

For his part, Makoto made sure to eat both the tuna and the mackel in equal proportions and declare them both delicious. "You are so wishy washy!" complained Haru. Makoto just grinned. "Doesn't matter, though," said Haru, "Mackel still wins and I still get to sleep with you," he added with a grin.

"Please don't phrase it like that Haru-chan," complained Makoto blushing, "It makes it sound as if we are about to do something perverted."

"Not with me in the room you are not!" declared Rin.

"We wouldn't do anything even if you weren't here!" Makoto protested.

"Or would we…" Haru pipped in.

"Haru!" came Makoto's exasperated reply. Haru just grinned.

* * *

The next morning Makoto woke-up just as Haru and Rin were getting ready for their run. They invited him to join them. Makoto knew it was a bad idea but agreed to anyway, if only because he wanted to run with them, with Haru, even though he didn't like running much.

It was fine at first but soon, Rin and Haru started to quicken and quicken their pace. Before long Makoto was left far behind but neither noticed as they were caught-up competing with each other. Makoto sighed and dropped his pace, he knew this would happen, but it still kind of hurt to be left behind like that. It was the crab festival all over again. Suddenly Makoto felt really sad, remember the lonely walk he had taken to return home when Haru had ditched not only him but the rest of his friends to compete with Rin in increasingly stupid matches.

For a brief moment Makoto wondered if instead of seeing more of Haru now that Haru was in Tokyo, he would just end-up not seeing much of either of them because they would be too busy competing with each other. The thought made Makoto even sadder. He sighed again and decided to just head back. Maybe stop at the convenience store and pick-up some drinks. Maybe some sports drinks since those two were likely to be thirsty when they got back and he didn't think he had any sports drinks in his fridge. For himself he might grab some oolong tea for now and a maybe a can of coffee for later.

Did he need anything else? He couldn't remember but he probably should go home, take stock and make a shopping list. He hadn't had a chance to go do his weekly grocery shopping and he probably should do it this morning. He had the afternoon off but had to go to the movie set this evening and he wasn't sure when he could go shopping next if he didn't go this morning. Occupying his mind with just domestic concerns, Makoto successfully diverted his mind brooding too much on being forgotten by Rin and Haru.

* * *

**Author's note:** Thanks of reading!


	23. Chapter 23

**Losing Makoto**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing!

* * *

"Where the hell is Makoto?" demanded Rin when the two had reached their limits or at least the point when they knew further running would mean they would have issues even walking back home.

Haru didn't know, he looked around concerned. Cursing himself for not noticing that Makoto was falling behind. He should have stopped and waited for him to catch-up. But surely he couldn't be that far behind? So they waited, as they caught their breath but there was no Makoto in sight.

"He… he ditched us!" Rin concluded after a while. "I can't believe he ditched us!"

Haru didn't answer and instead headed back. Rin followed, simultaneously pulling out his phone as he intended to send a quick message to Makoto. But instead found a short text waiting for him, "Hey, heading back and going grocery shopping. Left sports drink for you guys in the fridge. Depending on how far you guys run, I might be back before you guys get back. (^.^) - Makoto"

"He really did ditch us!" exclaimed Rin.

That didn't make sense to Haru. Makoto would never ditch anyone. But he had turned back… he must have been able to keep-up and instead of calling to Haru and Rin to slow down, he just left. That was so like Makoto that Haru couldn't really argue but what really got to him was how easily Makoto gave-up trying to keep-up with them. Makoto didn't used to be like this… was it just that his life was so busy that he just couldn't be bothered? That filled Haru with dread. He didn't like the idea of Makoto giving-up on him, of being okay without him and he didn't care if the thought was selfish!

"Hey," Rin said after a minute, "Is Makoto angry with us?" he asked, "I mean, why did he ditch us?"

"Makoto doesn't get angry, not for real," said Haru, "He only get annoyed if people are bothering him too much and he didn't 'ditch' us. Makoto doesn't ditch his friends."

"But…"

"Makoto's never been comfortable running," said Haru, "But since middle school, whenever he trains and puts on a lot of muscles really easily. But it's never the lean kind that helps you run well. He also doesn't like running because its hard on his frame," but he didn't mind the beach running during their training camp. Probably because it was easier on his feet. Speaking of that, what was Rei saying about tall people and running… something about shoes?

"Well I feel like a dick now," Rin interjected, "If I knew Makoto was going to have issues keeping-up, I would have ran slower or taken an easier route. Why doesn't he say anything!"

"Makoto wouldn't be Makoto if he whined," Haru said.

Rin glared, "He doesn't have to whine! Just… just share a bit!" Haru didn't reply.

Something about this conversation was making him uneasy. But Haru had no idea why it was making him uneasy. He took a minute to examine his feelings but when he couldn't find anything in the first few probes, he decided to drop it for now and just get back home as soon as he could.

* * *

"I am home!" called Makoto as he entered the flat, laden with groceries, "Something smells nice!"

"Welcome home," replied Haru with a smile, "I made green curry."

"Haru!" said Makoto excitedly, nearly dropping the grocery in the process.

"Oi! Careful," said Rin, coming to help him, "Geez! It's green curry! Mackerel curry too! No need to get so excited! Now the chocolate brownies I am baking, now those are to die for!"

Makoto laughed heartily, "Green curry and chocolate, my favourites! But what's the occassion though?"

"Well today is my last day staying with you," said Rin, "So… thank you?" offered Rin.

"I don't need a reason to cook curry for Makoto," replied Haru proudly.

Makoto just beamed, "Thank you Haru-chan," and turning to Rin, "Thank you Rin."

* * *

Makoto had to go to the movie set straight after lunch. He said his goodbyes because Rin and Haru would be gone by the time he returned. They were both reluctant to leave. Rin could only imagine the storm he was about to walk into. Mikoshiba aside, no one had been very friendly towards him and now, now he was the guy who literally punched open a drug scandal. He didn't want to return to the dorm but he was eager to get back to training.

Haru had a different problem. He was an only child who had been living on his own since second semester of 1st year of high school. He had never lived in a dorm and in fact, didn't like being surrounded by people. He also needed alone time just to recharge but in a dorm, would he even be allowed to soak in a bath by himself? Not to mention he would probably have some obnoxious talkative person for a roommate. Haru sighed again. Praying hard that he would be able to get away to Makoto's apartment a lot. If Makoto wasn't there he could use the space for his alone time. Otherwise, well, he'll be with Makoto!

"You two will be sharing," replied the dorm manager when Rin and Haru got to the dorm.

"Ha?"

"Huh!"

"Due to…" the dorm manager paused to consider his words carefully, "Events in the time you were away Matsuoka-kun, we have had to shuffle people around. We have also had some new entrants into the program, just like Nanase-san, and it was decided to put a new person with someone who had been in the program since the start," the manager explained, "Someone said you two were friends and since almost no one else wanted to share with you," he pointed to a rather long list of people who seemed to have indicated a desire not to share with Rin, "We decided to put you to together. I hope its okay?" he asked turning to Haruka, "If not, you can swap with Mikoshiba-kun. He said he was okay sharing with Matsuoka-kun. Although the you would be paired with another newcomer."

Rin pulled a face but Haru said quickly, "I am happy sharing with Rin."

They got their room number and carried what luggage they had to their new shared dorm room in silence. Once inside, Haru stated the obvious, "They don't seem to like you."

"Fuck them," said Rin, "I don't need them to like me."

"But you can't swim a relay with people you don't like," said Haru.

"One thing I learnt in Australia," said Rin, "Is that you don't always have to like the people you share a lane with. If you want to win and the people in the lane can help you, that's enough. Huh," Rin added almost to himself, "Maybe that's my problem. You guys ruined me for forever with your friendship!" he said jokingly, smiling.

Haru didn't reply. He didn't really know what to think. But then decided he didn't have to. He would just train and swim and leave all the other stuff to people who understood that kind of thing. He was only there to swim freestyle 100m and 200m long course and it was suggested he should consider 400m short course. He didn't have a powerful enough kick for 100m or 200m in the short course. He was seriously considering it as it had been sometime since he had swam short course events.

"Are you only swimming butterfly?" Haru suddenly asked, realising he didn't know what Rin was doing anymore.

"Concentrating on butterfly but I am keeping up my freestyle," Rin replied, "But I doubt I'll be any shape to win a place for the Asian games with my Freestyle. I mean, the trials are on the 1st of August! That's not a lot of time."

"You think you can get in the team?" asked Haru.

"No," replied Rin honestly, "You and me are both here as 'long term' prospects. I mean, you aren't even on the special diet yet," Haru pulled a face at the mention of the stupid high calorie diet. He's been assured he could modify it to include mackerel but it seemed like so much trouble! The things he did for Makoto. "But that's besides the point. I'll still do my best."

"Just don't cry if you lose," said Haru, not really meaning anything.

"You can be such a cruel bastard," said Rin, a bit hurt. Even though he realised Haru didn't mean anything and besides, it was a fact that he still had issue coping with hitting walls and let his emotions affect his performances too much. "I am better now."

"You make it sound like you were sick," replied Haru.

"In a way I was," said Rin, "Thinking back on it, I was lonely. I mean, I only really had one friend and I didn't stay friends with her all throughout. Besides, as wonderful a person as she was, there were just so many things I couldn't discuss with her. I missed having male friends or just other friends besides my girlfriend. You know what I mean."

Haru didn't have a clue what Rin meant and Rin picked-up on that, "Like seriously? You have never been lonely?"

"Makoto was always with me," replied Haru flatly, "I have no memory of a time without Makoto."

"Well what about wanting other friends besides Makoto?" wondered Rin, "Surely there are things you can't discuss with Makoto. I mean, surely you don't tell him everything."

Haru thought about it for a long time before saying, "I didn't tell Makoto about what happened with you but even if I had others with me back then, like Nagisa or Rei, I wouldn't have been able to say anything. If I can't tell Makoto, I can't tell anyone else," even as the words left Haru's lips, he realised that wasn't entirely true. Afterall, he had told Nagisa and Rei why he hadn't confessed to Makoto. So there were things he could talk to other people about but not Makoto. Since he didn't want to lie, Haru added the modifier, "Usually anyway."

Rin either didn't register the nuance or didn't think to question it. He just said, "Well I can't be like that. Maybe I am too just used to having all sorts of different bonds. You know, like with Gou, my friends from Sano elementary and Sano swim club, you guys."

"You didn't exactly stay in touch with us," Haru pointed out.

"I know," said Rin, "I just had these romantic notions in my head that I would come back super strong, having proven myself against some of the best in the world and I don't know, dazzle everybody," he admitted sheepishly, "You know, something like a samurai who leaves his village to learn the way of the sword. No one knows if he is still alive but then he returns and saves his village with his dazzling skills!" Rin grinned.

"Save a village with swimming skill... " Haru found himself giving the notion some serious thought.

Well it couldn't be done in the conventional way. Certainly not in the same way a samurai could save a village with his sword skills. No matter how good a swimmer, if an entire village as drowning, only one or two people would be able to be saved. Unless you taught everybody to swim… or maybe if a swimmer became really famous they could be a tourist attraction and thus help the village economy. Haru would hate that! Even for an entire village, he didn't think he could become a swimming show monkey. But then again, isn't that what the elite swimmers were? Afterall, the spectators did come to be entertained.

Rin put an end of his musing with, "Yeah, it was a stupid dream but it was worse when I couldn't achieve it and became one of those people who leaves their village with dreams of making it big but instead ends-up broken and defeated but with shame preventing their return home," Rin laughed self mockingly, "Sounds like a plot of a cheesy movie doesn't it?"

"It fits you," replied Haru, "You were always… romantic," he said before turning to inspect the bunk bed, "I am taking the bottom bunk."

"I wanted the bottom bunk!" protested Rin.

"No," said Haru firmly.

"Fine! But don't complain if my insomnia disturbs your sleep!" said Rin.

"Insomnia?" asked Haru.

Rin sighed, "Yes, although it hasn't been so bad since I started training here," he explained, "But there are nights that I just can't stop thinking."

"I'll take my chances," said Haru dismissively.

"Suit yourself," replied Rin and so began Haru's life with the National Swim program.

* * *

Haru as on a slightly different training schedule to Rin on account to being under a different assistant coach and because he was only training for freestyle while Rin was training for both butterfly and freestyle. More importantly, Haru didn't have school anymore. Iwatobi High didn't have a distance education program and Haru couldn't be bothered transferring to a Tokyo school or just another school with a distance education program.

He was going to just drop out, being past the compulsory education age, but Amakata-sensei instead arranged for him to sit a special exam. If Haru passed, he would just be given his High School degree. Of course Haru aced the exams and as he got his degree in the mail, wondered why he hadn't done this sooner. Then he remembered that while dragging himself out of his house to go to school was a pain, it was tolerable while Makoto was with him. But he was happy to be done with school now.

His parents were also happy enough to keep giving him an allowance. Haru also had a small stipend from the National Swim program designed to cover costs of basic swim gear. His dorm and food costs at the dorm were covered by the program budget as long as he didn't ask for anything special. Haru was happy to pay extra for mackerels. But between the money his parents sent him and stipend he got through the program, Haru's expenses were more than covered. So he didn't have to work like some of the other members of the program.

What it all meant was that Haru had more free time then he thought he would. He spent most of it at Makoto's apartment, regardless of whether Makoto was there or not. Haru was actually grateful of the alone time he got at Makoto's apartment as it helped him recharge. Not to mention he could take long baths without being inconsiderate. It also gave him an opportunity to look after Makoto and Makoto needed looking after.

Most days Makoto came home too tired to do anything but curl-up in bed, needing a nap before he could even bring himself to eat. Cooking would have been out of the question. Some nights he just didn't come home at all! Either Shinji kept him at the studio overnight or the movie had some odd shooting times that made it more practical for Makoto to stay near the set overnight.

Makoto also had end of semester exams to study for and unlike Haru, Makoto wasn't good enough to get his degree without actually doing the remaining two semesters of 3rd year high school. Haru began to seriously worry about Makoto's health.

Finally, near the end of June, close to Haru's birthday, Makoto was done with the movie job and being summer holidays, no longer had school. Citing his exhaustion, Makoto managed to get a few days off around Haru's birthday. Although Haru himself couldn't get any time off but what it did mean was that once Haru was done training, they do of them could actually do stuff together without Makoto nodding off in the middle of a sentence.

Plus Makoto would actually be able to spend the weekend of 28th and 29th just lazing about with Haru instead of studying or worse, working through the weekend since both movies sets and recording studios were fully capable of going 24/7.

They ended-up renting a TV and game system and gaming for most of the weekend. Although Haru insisted that Makoto go to sleep early. Makoto's handsome features were marred with tell tale signs of sleep deprivation and exhaustion and Haru most certainly did not approve. So he made Makoto drink lots of water and eat food with a lot of moisture in them. Not to mention lots and lots of mackerels. It seemed to have worked because by the time Haru and Rin met-up with Makoto monday afternoon, he was looking as handsome as ever!

"I slept all day," admitted Makoto sheepishly.

"Good," said Haru simply.

"Where are we going?" asked Rin, they were going somewhere to celebrate Haru's birthday. Rin guessed it would be a seafood place of some sort.

Makoto grinned, "Zauo Shinjuku Restaurant!" Haru's eyes lit-up and started to sparkle.

* * *

"Haru-chan!" cried Nagisa as he glomped Haru.

"Happy Birthday, Haruka-senpai!" said Rei, joining them.

"Ri-Rin-senpai, hello and um… happy birthday Nanase-san, sorry for intruding," said Nagisa, also approaching the group.

"What are you all doing here?" wondered Haru.

"Rei-chan and I wanted to help Haru-chan celebrate his birthday," said Nagisa, "One of my sister lives here and Rei-chan's brother also studies in Tokyo. So we thought it would be a good excuse to come visit them and see you!"

"I also wanted to check-out some universities," said Rei, "It'll take some time to carefully research my future choices so I thought I might as well get started."

"I… I tagged along because I wanted to see Matsuoka-senpai," said Nitori, "Nagisa-kun's sister was kind enough to let me stay with her too."

Rin blinked, wondering when those two had gotten that close but before he could say anything, Haru whispered, "Thank you."

"Don't mention it! We miss Haru-chan already and have been missing Makoto-chan for ages!" said Nagisa, "Mako-chan! Why did you have to leave!" he demanded, turning to glomp Makoto.

Makoto laughed good naturedly, "Fame and fortune?" He offered jokingly.

Nagisa pouted but then cheered-up, "Well let's go fishing!" For the Zauo restaurant in Shinjuku was the restaurant where you caught your own fish.

You were made to feel as if you were on a boat and were casting a line over the side to catch your dinner. But essentially, there was a giant aquarium running through the restaurant and you cast your line into it and caught a fish to be prepared as you liked it. It was, Haru realised, the closest he and Makoto had gotten to taking one of their fishing trips in a long time. Hopefully, they would find time to go fishing before long.

There weren't any mackerels in the tank but Haru was still satisfied with the fish he caught. He also caught one for Nitori who was utterly hopeless at catching fish. Makoto and Rin both managed to reel in a big one. While Nagisa, despite being loud and fidgety, somehow managed to not scare all the fish away. Rei had of course memorised all the theory and fortunately, also had practical experience from having gone fishing from time to time with his family.

"Nanase-san is amazing," said Nitori, once the fish Haru had caught for him was brought back in sashimi form, "Thank you for catching the fish for me."

"It wasn't much of a challenge," replied Haruka, "These fish are meant to be caught."

"They do seem stupid," agreed Rin.

The talk soon turned to various different things. Nagisa enthusiastically relayed school gossip, random news out of Iwatobi to both Haru and Makoto, while Rin and Rei ended-up in a deep discussion about swimming theories, or to be more accurate, the technical aspect of swimming strokes and muscle development. Nitori was happy to listen and contribute what he could to either discussion.

The conversation edded and flowed. Nagisa got-up to go to the restroom and in the ensuring void of energy, Nitori quietly asked Makoto, "Um… Tachibana-san um… this might be a strange question but umm… what would you do on a… um… date?"

Rin full on chocked on the piece of fish he was eating as Makoto gave a startled, "Eh?"

"Rin-senpai! Please don't die!" cried Nitori as he started to rub Rin's back to help him get the fish piece out.

"Here, have some water," said Haru because of course the water would solve everything.

"Rin-chan is choking!" declared Nagisa excitedly as he got back to the desk.

"Don't be happy about it!" cried Rei.

When Rin finally stopped choking he demanded, "What brought on that question?"

"Well… well… do you remember last year I asked if you were a girl and you had to date either me or Captain Mikoshiba, who would you pick?" asked Nitori.

"Yes…"

"And you said neither," reminded Nitori.

Rin felt bad remember how he imagined a date with Nitori would go, "I didn't know either of you that well back then and um… might have um… perceive a date would be…" he took a deep breath, "Annoying and awkward."

"Exactly!" agreed Nitori.

"Don't just agree with me!" chastised Rin.

But Nitori pressed on, "But you would definitely go on a date with Tachibana-san! So I was wondering what Tachibana-san would do on a date that would be cool and amazing and would totally win over senpai's heart!"

"Hey! Don't just go putting Mako-chan with Rin-chan you damn MakoRin shipper!" said Nagisa, getting serious, "Haru-chan called dibs!"

"When?" demanded Nitori.

"The moment Mako-chan was born!" declared Nagisa, "And last year! When I asked Haru-chan who he would date from the swim club, Haru-chan picked Mako-chan! I had to bribe him with mackerels to pick me and I am sure Haru-chan only did that because he was mad at Mako-chan for being wishy-washy and saying he couldn't choose between us when he should have just said 'Haru of course!'" said Nagisa sagely.

Nitori pouted, "Well I think Tachibana-san would be better off with senpai! Senpai might be a bit rude and kind of acts like a delinquent, but he's studious and cool-looking and also a nice guy! He's completely perfect!" Nitori declared as Rin turned beet-red.

Haru was torn between finding this amusing, wondering if he should be worried about Nitori being so adamant that Rin get together with Makoto and just enjoying Makoto's perfect WTF-is-happening face. Rei had a look of resigned acceptance that came from associating with Nagisa.

"Well why don't you date Rin-chan," said Nagisa annoyed, "Besides! Haru-chan might act cold and distant but he's brave, caring, pure person and the best friend a person can ever have! Mako-chan deserves the best and Haru-chan is the best!"

"Do… do you have a crush on Nanase-san?" demanded Nitori, mortified.

"Of course I love Haru-chan! He put on a girl's swimsuit for me! I bet Ai-chan won't ever put on a girl's swimsuit for me! Even for sex!" said Nagisa.

"Nagisa-kun we are in a public place!" Rei pointed out in vain.

"Wait a horrified minute!" Rin interjected, "What do you mean Haru put on a girl's swimsuit and why do you want Nitori to put on a girl's swim… fuck no! Tell me you two are not dating!"

"But that would be a lie and you shouldn't lie, Rin-chan!" said Nagisa, perfectly innocently. Nitori just made himself very small as he turned red as a tomato. Rin just gaped opened mouthed.

Silence, awkward silence ensured. It was finally broken with Makoto laughing a little, "Well congratulations Nitori, Nagisa," he said good naturedly, "From what I understand, Rin, on Nagisa's first day at Iwatobi Swim Club, his sisters played a plank on him and slipped in one of their swimsuits in his bag. He was very upset and so to cheer him up, Haru swapped suits with him. It was all perfectly innocent," he assured as Haru nodded.

"Unless you are a pervert," Nagisa added, totally unhelpfully, "Are you a pervert Rin-chan? Mako-chan is totally not allowed to date perverts you know. He's too precious!"

"Fuck you to hell, Nagisa!" said Rin.

"No thank you!" said Nagisa, "I am taken!" he said as he laced his hands with Nitori's, who looked both happy and embarrassed. Rin wondered when the sweet innocent Nagisa was corrupted into whatever this version was.

"Now, now," said Makoto, trying to keep peace, "As for your earlier question, Nitori," said Makoto, "Well let's see… I guess it would depend on whether its a first date or not, and also on how much I knew the person before hand," he explained, "Unless we planned something specific, I would most definitely meet them in a place where there were lots of options. Like Shinagawa, for example. That way we could catch a movie or grab something to eat or just walk around looking at the shops and stuff. I would definitely try and get there a little early so as to not keep them waiting but I wouldn't want to be too early. Especially for a first date because waiting for a long time when you are nervous is the worst! So probably 10 to 15 minute early would be good. Then when they came, I would ask them if they wanted to do something specific. If not, we would decide together."

"But I would definitely have some suggestions ready and if I knew the person, like I know Rin and Haru, I would have suggestions based on what I knew about them," Makoto continued, "For Haru would I suggest we go to the Shinagawa aquarium because I knew he would really like that. I would also look-up nearby places that served mackerels for a meal, maybe after the aquarium," he said, "For Rin I would maybe look-up what movies were playing nearby in English that I knew he would like, summer blockbusters or cute romance flicks…"

"Oi! Don't tell them that!" Rin interjected, horrified that his deep dark secret of liking so called 'chick flick romances' was being exposed.

"Sorry," Makoto apologised with a smile, "But anyway, that's what I would do."

"That's… that's perfect!" said Nitori, "Thank you Tachibana-san, I picked-up some good tips!"

"That's our Mako-chan!" said Nagisa, "But don't worry Ai-chan, as long as you take me to places where I can have sweet stuff, especially strawberry shortcakes, I'll be totally happy and making you happy!"

"Nagisa-kun!" cried Rei as Nitori looked like he was about to have a heart attack.

"Which brings me to my question, how did this horrific and evil pairing happen?" demanded Rin

"Well it all started when Rei-chan got the hots for a girl in our grade. She's really good in her studies and does gymnastics. Rei-chan says she has beautiful form but I just think he likes her knockout knockers!"

"Nagisa-kun that's my girlfriend you are talking about!" an exasperated Rei tried to chastise the indomitable Nagisa.

"It's okay Rei-chan, I am gay!"

"How does you being gay excuse you describing my girlfriends breasts in such lewd terms?" wondered Rei.

"I am only admiringly them aesthetically!" replied Nagisa cheerfully.

"I don't see how that works."

"Details, details," dismissed Nagisa and pressed on with the story, "Rei-chan really had the hots for her and so Gou-chan and I decided we would setup a mixer so Rei-chan could get to know her. But a mixer needs three couples minimum. Gou-chan got her friend Chigusa-chan to be the 3rd girl but we were short a boy. Then I ran into Ai-chan while out shopping for a new swimsuit and asked him to be the 3rd boy. He agreed!"

"I actually said no but Nagisa-kun wouldn't listen," admitted Nitori, "In the end I ended-up coming because I knew Nagisa-kun would be counting on me."

Nagisa smiled sweetly, "It was all going really well!" Nagisa started but was interrupted.

"It was a disaster," corrected Rei, "We were just introducing ourselves when Nagisa-kun felt the need to include 'number one MakoHaru shipper at makochanfanclub' along with 2nd year high school student and swim club member. The girls, apart from Gou, were confused but Nitori-kun jumped on that and asked if he was BigCutePenguin and a real life shipwar started right in the middle of the family restaurant," he said with a sigh.

"Unsurprisingly, Hanamura-san declared she was bored after ten minutes and declared the mixer a failure. She walked out and Gou-san followed to try and placate her. Megumi, that's my girlfriend - Minori Megumi, was in the middle of taking her leave when… I guess she noticed how wrapped-up Nagisa-kun and Nitori-kun where getting with each other. So she stuck around to keep me company," Rei smiled fondly.

"And the rest as they say," interjected Nagisa, "Was history!"

"How?" demanded Rin, "I mean, I can see why Rei is dating this girl but how did you two go from discussing who would be better for Makoto, me or Haru, to dating."

"Well we went back to Ai-chan's dorm room to review fanfics and fanart as a way to determine which ship was better and well, one thing lead to another and we ended-up doing it. Repeatedly."

Rin, Haru and Makoto were collectively stunned and horrified when they realised that Nagisa and Nitori had gotten off on fan made porn, starring them. "That's um… disturbing," said Makoto truthfully.

"Oh no, it wasn't like we got turned on looking at hentai doujins made by Mako-chan fans," said Nagisa.

"Wait, my fans made hentai doujins of me?" asked Makoto, getting a little more disturbed.

"They aren't much to look at," replied Haru of all people, "They always get your proportions wrong."

"Wait, you have been looking at Makoto hentai?" demanded Rin.

"I was curious," said Haru honestly.

"Let's not talk about this any more," suggested a thoroughly embarrassed Makoto.

"Don't worry Makoto," said Haru reassuringly, "They got your body totally wrong."

"I don't think that's the issue here!" said the exasperated Makoto.

"As I was saying," interjected Nagisa, "We ran across a fanfic that described a sexual position that Ai-chan thought couldn't be pleasurable but I thought it seemed interesting but it was complicated and so we couldn't just do it first up and so we start…"

"Enough!" Rin stopped him, "I have heard enough! Any more and my childhood memories of you will be tainted forever! Give me back my cute innocent Nagisa!"

"To think you didn't even know men kept porn under their bed before too long," said Rei wistfully.

"Why would you keep porn under your bed?" wondered Nagisa.

"I keep them in my bed as suggested by Rin-senpai," said Nitori beaming.

Makoto gave-up and turning to Haru said, "Let's go somewhere else for dessert," hoping against hope the change of venue would stop this R-18 thread of discussion. Haru simply nodded.

* * *

Because Nagisa and Nitori couldn't decide what they wanted, the other four boys found themselves sitting and eating while those two were still choosing. Makoto took this opportunity to ask Rei a bit more about his girlfriend.

"She really is a wonderful person," Rei was saying, "Beautiful, studious and is very theoretical in her approach to gymnastic. But at the same time she displays the kind of grace and elegance for which there is no theory. It comes right from the soul, the essence of art you might call it. I really admire her."

Makoto smiled, "I am glad, I would like to meet her."

"I am sure you'll get along really well with her, Makoto-senpai," said Rei, "I mean, I had a crush on her but what pretty much sealed it to like if not love is her kindness. I mean, any other girl would have left when the mixer went so horribly wrong but she stayed. She later told me that she realised that if she left, I would be really lonely," Rei explained.

"She knew Nagisa-kun and I were friend. She figured I couldn't just leave Nagisa-kun but Nagisa-kun was getting totally wrapped-up in his silly shipwar with Nitori-kun. Nagisa-kun was ignoring and neglecting me without meaning to," Rei elaborated.

Rin and Haru stopped in the midst of eating their dessert as Rei's words triggered an epiphany in them both. Was that what they had been doing to Makoto? Had Makoto been feeling ignored and neglected as they got caught-up competing with each other? Rin felt like someone had punched him in the gut, while Haru just sat frozen at the thought that he might have hurt Makoto - no matter how unintentionally. Makoto seemed to pick-up on Haru's distress and shot him a concerned look but the time and place prevented him from asking Haru what was bothering him.

"So she stuck around so that I wouldn't be lonely," Rei was continuing, "I have never had a lot of friends and I can't say that I am not used to being neglected or forgotten by my friends. Although it was never done with malicious intent. There was just someone more interesting in the room. So the fact she picked-up on that and stuck around because of that meant a lot. But once we got talking we had a lot in common and just enough difference to make things interesting and well," Rei grinned.

"Congratulations," Makoto said heartily, "She sounds like a really wonderful person."

"Thank you," replied Rei, "And she is." Nitori and Nagisa joined them having finally made their choice and the conversation topic changed to different forms of desserts. But neither Rin, nor Haru talked much for the remainder of the evening.

* * *

**Author's note:** So a few things about this chapters,

1. Green curry and chocolate are Makoto's favourite food according to the recently released official guide book (or whatever those books are called) for Free!

2. I gave Rin a mild case of insomnia because we saw a couple of scenes of him being awake late at night thinking too much. Of course he obviously had a lot on his mind and so calling it insomnia is stretching it a bit. But I wanted to give a reason for why Rin preferred the bottom bunk (Nitori gives him a choice in Drama CD 2 and Rin picked bottom) and a mild case of insomnia seemed a good enough reason.

3. I have read a few fics where Haru is supposedly a bad student and some people have taken "Haru's worst subject is english" (from one of the official profiles) as Haru's really bad in english. But I found nothing in canon that says Haru is bad at studies. In fact, in High Speed its implied he's just good at everything. We get indirect evidence in that anime that both Makoto and Haru are probably good at academics. This is because they keep getting away with a lot of stuff. Sure they get scolded but that's all that seems to happen. No detention or anything. If they were bad or even average students, I doubt the school would be as lenient with them or so I think.

As for the english thing, well Rin is supposed to be top 10 in all his subjects but even he has "worst subjects". It's a relative thing. So Haru could be top in all his other subjects but maybe just in top 10 in english, i.e. its his worst subject relative to his other subjects but that doesn't mean he's actually bad in the subject. So for this fic, I just decided that Harus' a genius who can take a test to demonstrate he doesn't need to stick around for two more semester and should just be given his degree now.

4. I got a little confused with the summer holidays because according to the drama CDs, Haru spent his birthday (June 30th) at camp and it was in fact the last day of their training camp. They had their training camp during summer holidays so summer holidays in the Free! verse must start mid June at least. But wikipedia said Japan summer holidays usually start late July o.O I think we need to chalk this up to KyoAni taking artistic license and giving the boys a different time frame for their summer holiday and so I decided to take KyoAni's summer holiday time frame and make it so that Makoto was free for Haru's birthday.

5. I honestly don't know if they have TV and game renting services in Japan. I don't even know if they still have them… well anywhere but let's just say they do!

6. My sincere apology to any Rei x Nagisa fans reading this fic. I was just going to leave them alone and let people assume they were together if they were Reigisa fans or not if, like me, they just don't see Rei and Nagisa as anything but friends. But then I saw the FrFr! shorts from the latest DVD volume (watch?v=ezN1LuoqbRo YouTube if you haven't seen it) and I had this weird thought about Nagisa and Nitori getting together and well the crack NagiTori scene above resulted. But Nagisa calling Nitori Ai-chan, its from Drama CD #2.


End file.
